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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2707
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About xzanex : I'm a typical college student who just never outgrew reading FMLs.

xzanex's page activity

Visits<b>samrompain</b> - yesterday at 7:27pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 10:18pm<b>Beardy1111</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 1:58pm<b>cadyshaw17</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 10:25am<b>dansco</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 7:51pm<b>hardcorefan16</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 12:02am<b>MDoremis</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 8:28pm<b>blondbombshell13</b> - the 09/13/2015 at 6:47pm<b>Chairez6164</b> - the 09/13/2015 at 5:50am<b>SuperDani</b> - the 09/12/2015 at 7:35pm<b>MrsPegg</b> - the 09/12/2015 at 6:10pm<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 8:54pm<b>Mons</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 4:58pm<b>sevenwondersx</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 9:01am<b>yosico22</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 7:50pm<b>potionowl</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 12:53am<b>asdfghjklmoo</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 10:15pm<b>Angel1999</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 9:07pm

Fucked!<b>dansco</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 1:51am<b>blondbombshell13</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 5:01am<b>Mons</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 1:43pm<b>potionowl</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 6:54am<b>Pandacupcakelove</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 7:41pm

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The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

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You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

See all of xzanex's badges

xzanex's favorite FMLs

Today, while looking through my son's browser history, I found a Google search for "stop looking in my history u nosey cunt". I swore last week that I don't invade his privacy, so I can't even punish him for the bad language without looking like a lying bastard. FML


I agree, your life sucks (9219) - you deserved it (33237)

On 10/11/2015 at 7:45am - kids - by Hank-T4 (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while walking home after a night of partying, I saw a thin, bald person in a suit looking at me from across the street. I got flashbacks to the Slender Man, screamed like a little bitch and ran. Then I realized I'd just humiliated myself in front of some random guy waiting for a bus. FML


I agree, your life sucks (13315) - you deserved it (15816)

On 10/08/2015 at 12:04pm - work - by shitbucketsfilledwithshit (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend fed a "random mushroom from the woods" to my rabbit. It then had a violent seizure and died. He claims it must have been from "natural causes". FML

Today, at the swimming pool, I thought it'd be funny to sneak up on my 5-year-old daughter underwater and surprise her. I grabbed her by the sides, and she shrieked. A moment later, a brown cloud erupted from her swimsuit. Cue screaming and a mass panic from the other kids. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21091) - you deserved it (10689)

On 10/03/2015 at 3:00am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, a guy threatened to sue me for fraud because I informed him that he had to start paying back his student loans. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21321) - you deserved it (1562)

On 10/02/2015 at 8:25am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my dad introduced me as his pet orangutan. I'm a redhead. FML

Today, I got an angry call from my 7-year-old son's school. It turned out that while doing a "what I want to be when I'm older" assignment, he wrote that he wants to be an internet troll so he can make people mad and make them kill themselves. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23975) - you deserved it (3655)

On 09/23/2015 at 11:48am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my daughter's 14-year-old boyfriend confessed, in front of her, that he only went out with her so he might have a chance to date me. My daughter isn't speaking to me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24539) - you deserved it (1630)

On 09/22/2015 at 5:54pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Cardiff)

Today, my dad was telling me some childhood stories. He mentioned I once started sucking on a cow's udder when I was 2, and I asked why didn't he stop me. His response: "You were an accident and I wasn't good at the parenting thing". FML


I agree, your life sucks (24282) - you deserved it (1659)

On 09/22/2015 at 9:41am - misc - by gotmilk? - United States (Florida)

Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28216) - you deserved it (2856)

On 09/21/2015 at 10:45am - misc - by Gassy - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I let my 9-year-old daughter use my tablet while I made her dinner. A few minutes later, she let out a blood-curdling scream. Turned out she'd searched for My Little Pony pictures and stumbled upon a drawing of Rainbow Dash giving another pony a blowjob. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25855) - you deserved it (4493)

On 09/02/2015 at 11:26am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my husband and I locked our keys in the car. Our only spare is in the drawer with all our sex toys. So we either had to get our oldest go in the drawer and get them to bring to us or walk the 12 miles home. My feet will never recover from that walk. FML


I agree, your life sucks (16846) - you deserved it (22848)

On 08/24/2015 at 12:25am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, the professor I've had a crush on informed me that there's only one way left I could still pass his course. Thinking this was an attempt to flirt with me, I told him I'd do anything he could imagine. He then looked confused when he asked me to write an essay. FML


I agree, your life sucks (10357) - you deserved it (30587)

On 08/21/2015 at 3:43pm - misc - by notwhatithought (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I had to fire an employee due to his staggering incompetence. The moment I said the F-word, he started fake-coughing, then loudly humming, then went to his desk and pretended not to hear anything I was saying. It took 3 of us to drag him out of the building kicking and screaming. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24469) - you deserved it (1780)

On 08/15/2015 at 11:47am - work - by bruised - United States (Florida)

Scarlatine's illustrated FML

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  • Are your abs well-toned and look like you’re made of metal? Feel like a machine ready to take whatever the crossfit fad can throw at you? Do you scream, ”Bro, do you Even lift?" at people during…

Monday 5 October 2015

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