xxsakuraxx

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xxsakuraxx

15Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 July 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6415
  • Number of comments : 215
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 38 posted

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xxsakuraxx's page activity

Visits<b>tin_cup</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 11:36pm<b>AXel2169</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 3:39pm<b>piker117</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 5:27pm<b>Swizzles</b> - the 06/28/2016 at 1:24am<b>LycanGod</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 10:58pm<b>AyeTee77</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 2:15pm<b>ShaneBarnes</b> - the 05/18/2016 at 2:11pm<b>pks2014</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 5:53pm<b>deathrise007</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 1:38pm<b>Mons</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 2:42am<b>DerrickJames</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 4:12pm<b>thomas5915</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 9:51pm<b>Rozza17</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 5:26am<b>Tripartita</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 4:47pm<b>Khaleesi_26</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 3:56pm<b>george_s_4</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 7:00am<b>writergirl1029</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 4:17am<b>sinverguenza</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 9:02pm

Fucked!<b>deathrise007</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 7:38pm<b>taybug1216</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 2:32pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 6:18pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 4:39am<b>Tenker</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 6:05am<b>NozomiTojo</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 11:08pm<b>interesting33</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 5:34pm<b>RealSuperSand</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 5:10pm<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 8:05pm<b>DoomSkuller</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 7:08am<b>pl0xs3rver</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 11:21pm<b>gopi</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 2:36pm<b>im_a_black_guy</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 9:59pm<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 9:10am

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xxsakuraxx's favorite FMLs

Today, my father decided it would be a good idea to give me the sex talk, at Target, at the top of his lungs. FML

by tobuscus9412 / 03/21/2015 at 9:04pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to bail my drunk dad out of jail after he beat the shit out of a mime artist. All he had to say on the matter was "Fucking bastard was playing mind games." and that he'd beat him up again if he could. FML

by ~__~ / 03/20/2015 at 5:23pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the grocery store with my four-year-old. She has some issues with wetting the bed, so I told her that if she wasn't sure if she was dreaming about "going", she should pinch herself to make sure she's awake. In the produce section, she pinched herself, smiled proudly, and peed. FML

by Anonymous / 03/15/2015 at 12:23am / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, I went to get a physical, forgetting I'd shaved my pubes the day before and still had bad razor burn. My doctor told me I had "dicken pox" and was prescribing me with shaving cream. FML

by parkoursam / 03/10/2015 at 12:45pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, at a big family dinner, my dad said, "Pfff, gays don't have it hard at all. The things a guy has to do for sex with a girl? Crazy. All a gay guy has to do for sex is become an altar boy!" My husband's side of the family is very religious, and all hell quickly broke loose. FML

by killme / 03/07/2015 at 1:42pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother walked in on me watching porn. As punishment, she sat down and made me watch the rest of it with her as she gave play-by-play commentary. FML

by Anonymous / 03/05/2015 at 10:19pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the doctor, because I've been having stomach pains and nausea for weeks. He ended up gravely telling me I'm pregnant. I freaked out and panicked about what my parents would say. Then his laughter reminded me that I'm a guy. A really stupid one. FML

by actually just constipated.. and stupid / 03/04/2015 at 10:03am / Tunisia / Health

Today, while cleaning my son's room, I found an envelope labelled "PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL" under his bed. I opened it, only to find it was a glitter bomb. I couldn't get it all cleaned off myself before he got home. He just said "HAH! Serves you right!" and went to his room smirking. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2015 at 1:11pm / United States (Oregon) / Kids

Today, my girlfriend said she was going to start appreciating the little things in life. She's starting with my penis. FML

by FreshDonuts / 02/28/2015 at 12:03am / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, I was doing laundry, so I decided to wash my cat's blanket. He chased me down the stairs into the basement, and I slightly closed the door behind me so he wouldn't follow me. He pushed the door shut, which automatically locks. I was trapped down there for 3 hours until my mom came home. FML

by jynxisadouchebag / 02/26/2015 at 7:08pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I am still finding glitter in my ass crack after a concert last night that had a confetti cannon. Thanks Marilyn Manson, I feel so metal now. FML

by frediqqq / 02/25/2015 at 11:21pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend managed to orgasm by humping my leg. I'm beginning to think I am dating a puppy. FML

by failuretolaunch2 / 02/25/2015 at 10:31pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my mother-in-law sent me a pedometer for my birthday. I've been confined to a wheelchair for most of my life. FML

by Anonymous / 02/22/2015 at 11:09am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, my husband again lost his keys. It's a daily struggle to find them. This time they were in an ice cube, literally. He said he must have accidentally put them in there when making ice. He's going to be the father of my future children. FML

by wife / 02/21/2015 at 10:47pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my youngest daughter finally started using the toilet on her own. That is, until her older sister showed her the South Park episode where someone gets their intestines sucked out by flushing the toilet. Now she won't go anywhere near the bathroom. FML

by Investing in Toilet Seatbelts / 02/14/2015 at 4:46am / United States (Nevada) / Kids