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xx_serenity

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xx_serenity

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 12 June 1992 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 489
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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xx_serenity's page activity

Visits<b>snsdGG</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 5:36pm<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 1:01pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 11:46am<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 12:38am<b>ProudDaddy</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 2:46am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 4:49am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 5:44pm<b>ann98darne</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 3:31am<b>PainStressLife</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 12:15am<b>rabidraccoon</b> - the 06/09/2013 at 12:52am<b>TheLazyStoner</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 12:21am

Fucked!<b>dakatabg</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 5:46pm

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xx_serenity's favorite FMLs

Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML

#20805312
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58928) - you deserved it (9693)

On 07/26/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by turning red - United States

Today, I heard my mom sobbing in the bathroom. Concerned, I went in to see what was wrong. I found her sitting on the toilet, pants down and a cigarette between her fingers. When I asked what was going on, she looked up at me and slurred that we'd run out of "shit-wipes." FML

#20804901
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44617) - you deserved it (3539)

On 07/26/2013 at 3:55pm - misc - by trailertrashyanditsucks (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while waxing my bikini line, my husband thought it would be funny to scare me which caused me to close my legs. I am now sitting in the sink with my best friend pouring hot water "down there" trying to remove the wax. FML

#20784225
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48862) - you deserved it (4407)

On 07/15/2013 at 1:25pm - misc - by helpme - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML

#20769088
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55220) - you deserved it (9460)

On 07/07/2013 at 5:57pm - kids - by nosestealer (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my parents spent all of the money in my college fund to pay for my cat to be flown to LA and audition for a movie. FML

#20764588
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64797) - you deserved it (3768)

On 07/05/2013 at 2:11am - money - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, I had a job interview. All was going well until the interviewer asked me, "So, why should we hire you?" Without thinking, I blurted out, "Because, I'm awesome!" Don't think I'll be getting that one. FML

Today, I went to the doctor to have my annual check-up. After the doctor made me waddle across the room towards him, hop on one foot for thirty seconds, and then lay on my stomach and do the worm, he finally said, "OK, that wasn't really part of the check-up. You're large on the hips. Lay off the Cheetos." FML

#20760331
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45513) - you deserved it (12028)

On 07/02/2013 at 7:16pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, while feeding my neighbour's cats, I mistakenly switched up their foods. One has medicated food that causes drowsiness. The healthy cat got knocked out like a log. I panicked, laid him out by the bed, and spilled milk around his head to make it look "natural." I think I'm going to hell. FML

#20697165
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31641) - you deserved it (34948)

On 05/31/2013 at 10:59am - animals - by fuckshitcockwaffle (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I have an upset stomach. Every other minute, it sounds like Chewbacca is screaming to get out. FML

#20675696
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37446) - you deserved it (4650)

On 05/20/2013 at 4:14pm - health - by pixkalexi - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my father gave me his blessing to be married on one condition: that I keep my maiden name when I marry. My fiancé thought it would be "epic". My last name will be hyphenated to Cobb-Webb. FML

#20509329
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33027) - you deserved it (5569)

On 02/16/2013 at 10:27am - love - by MsCobb - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to buy a birthday present for my boyfriend. While buying him a sweater, the cashier tried to up-sale me by asking if my boyfriend wore briefs or boxers, because both were on sale. Not thinking, I blurted out, "I don't know, they just come off." FML

#20477493
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26979) - you deserved it (12734)

On 01/25/2013 at 12:31am - misc - by awkwardturtle (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband and I found out that our dog was pregnant. He now refuses to have kids with me for at least two years, because he wants to raise the puppies without any "distractions". FML

#20140254
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26072) - you deserved it (3745)

On 10/30/2012 at 2:45pm - animals - by Lilly - United States

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he pulls out during doggy-style and rubs my clit with the tip of his penis, he will be rewarded with a queef. He found it hilarious and tested it out 5 more times. FML

#20105380
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32190) - you deserved it (6618)

On 10/07/2012 at 6:25am - intimacy - by SoSexy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my book bag was so heavy that it set off my car's passenger detection system in the front seat. I had to buckle in my textbooks. FML

#20068805
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25467) - you deserved it (3519)

On 09/12/2012 at 12:05pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, the office I work at put up a "No Masturbating at Desks" sign. I'm disappointed by this, not because I usually whack off at my desk, but because enough people do that there needs to be a sign against it. FML

#20043181
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28264) - you deserved it (3769)

On 08/26/2012 at 7:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)



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