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xXkiller_hushXx

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xXkiller_hushXx
  • Town/Country : Bowling green, United states
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 154
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About xXkiller_hushXx : I am the most awesome person anyone will ever meet. Just ask your mom.

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xXkiller_hushXx's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend finally succeeded in unhooking my bra with one hand, excitedly exclaiming, "Boobies be free!" FML

#21043704
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40420) - you deserved it (10143)

On 01/29/2014 at 12:13am - love - by freed - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up after a night out partying only to find I'd wet the bed. I was so ashamed that I rolled my girlfriend into it to avoid taking the blame. FML

#21042040
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20516) - you deserved it (54276)

On 01/27/2014 at 5:31pm - misc - by :( (man) - Algeria

Today, a man started a deep conversation with me at the bus stop about life, death, and the miracles of things we take for granted every day. I was really enjoying it until he looked at his watch and said, "Oh shit, mushrooms make me lose track of time!" and ran off into the night. FML

#20998821
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37077) - you deserved it (3873)

On 12/20/2013 at 3:45am - misc - by whatjusthappened (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was yelled at once again for being in the school gym without a coach present. I am the coach. FML

Today, I announced my engagement. My mother's response was to freak out and demand that I postpone my wedding indefinitely. Why? My younger sister caught the bouquet at a wedding last year, so "she has to get married first!" My sister has been single for 3 years and showers once a week. FML

#20858539
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46469) - you deserved it (2410)

On 08/28/2013 at 10:21pm - love - by marryinghimanyway (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my 13-year-old daughter and I went to a tropical themed restaurant. She wanted a strawberry Daiquiri, so I asked the waitress for a virgin strawberry Daiquiri. My daughter then said, "But dad, I'm not a virgin." FML

#20775827
334 comments

I agree, your life sucks (92444) - you deserved it (10330)

On 07/11/2013 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I poured my heart out to my now ex-girlfriend over the recent passing away of my grandmother. Her eyes glazed over multiple times, and when I said that I don't know how to cope with everything, her advice was simply, "Shotgun. Mouth. Blam." FML

#20766944
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47060) - you deserved it (4390)

On 07/06/2013 at 12:13pm - love - by Anonymous - Lithuania (Vilniaus Apskritis)

Today, I went over my girlfriend of 3 months' house for the first time. As we walked through the door, I was greeted by a little girl whose first words to me were, "Are you my daddy?" FML

#20766295
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50485) - you deserved it (4315)

On 07/06/2013 at 12:17am - love - by walker - United States

Today, I got home from work early and discovered why my 17-year-old daughter's sprained elbow isn't getting any better after weeks of treatment. She can't stop giving handjobs. FML

#20764944
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62392) - you deserved it (7358)

On 07/05/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I discovered that when my husband agreed to donate sperm so an infertile friend and his wife could have children, there was nothing "artificial" about the insemination. FML

#20762781
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57579) - you deserved it (4206)

On 07/04/2013 at 12:41am - intimacy - by OnPlanetVenus (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I found out I'm actually the uncle of my children. All four of them. FML

#20662485
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (91747) - you deserved it (5471)

On 05/14/2013 at 3:13am - kids - by Liferuinedforever (man) - Pakistan (Sindh)

Today, I received a notice that if I don't move the abandoned vehicle from outside my house it will be repossessed at my expense. My car isn't abandoned. FML

#20662395
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35110) - you deserved it (3282)

On 05/14/2013 at 1:29am - misc - by CrappyCar (woman) - United States

Today, my little brothers wouldn't stop teasing me over the fact that I'm a virgin and they are not. They are 13 and 16, I'm 22. What's worse? My dad quickly joined them. FML

#20657675
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54407) - you deserved it (6713)

On 05/12/2013 at 12:35am - misc - by lamsolonely - United States

Today, my boyfriend woke me up the same way he always does, by pulling on my hair. Just to be playful, I pulled him down on top of me and kissed him. Turns out his brother thought it would be funny to wake people up the same way. FML

#20656960
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50753) - you deserved it (8649)

On 05/11/2013 at 7:04pm - love - by wrongguy - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my stalker ex girlfriend turned up at my wedding, uninvited, wearing a wedding dress. FML

#20655660
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78889) - you deserved it (4368)

On 05/11/2013 at 2:25am - love - by tdrtnlz - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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