woofer

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woofer

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11203
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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woofer's page activity

Visits<b>jasonm27</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 2:11am<b>KingOfMexico</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 6:55pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 9:11am<b>kzarecor2019</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 7:15pm<b>kieman</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 2:33pm<b>PinkPoshling111</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 6:29pm<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 11:03pm<b>simplyblades</b> - the 06/23/2013 at 8:51pm<b>yer_maw</b> - the 05/11/2009 at 1:04pm<b>lizwriteslove</b> - the 04/28/2009 at 9:19pm<b>sammhasBADluck</b> - the 03/29/2009 at 8:29pm<b>Fabulousmeangirl</b> - the 03/29/2009 at 8:17pm<b>hellobirdie</b> - the 03/25/2009 at 3:20am<b>whitey</b> - the 03/24/2009 at 10:29pm<b>jesslackszazz</b> - the 03/24/2009 at 8:06pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 3:10pm

woofer's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

woofer's favorite FMLs

Today, my family threw me a surprise party. I was so surprised I punched my mom in the face when she screamed SURPRISE! FML

by Em / 04/30/2009 at 12:45pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, at 4 AM, I locked myself out of my apartment. After calling friends in vain, I decided to just sit on the doorstep and wait for someone to come in. I sat for 10 minutes before a homeless man insisted threateningly that I move. I was kicked off my own front doorstep by a homeless man. FML

Today, I was walking through the park eating fries. There was an old woman feeding a few pigeons. They didn't seem too interested, so I threw some fries down as I walked by to try and help her out. About 2 minutes later, I heard screaming. A huge group of pigeons were attacking the old woman. FML

by Anonymous / 04/14/2009 at 10:07am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was volunteering at a school. There's this really bratty boy there and he was being rude, so I joked, "How are you ever gonna get a girlfriend when you're so mean?" He responds, "I think the better question is how are you ever gonna get a boyfriend when you're so ugly." He's 7. FML

by ugly / 04/07/2009 at 7:34pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me over the phone. He said there was someone else, and that he has been in love with her for a while. Turns out, the new girl was his online video game character. I got dumped for a video game. FML

by w00tz / 03/27/2009 at 1:12am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

by konens_dick / 03/22/2009 at 6:38am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I drunk dialed my mom and told her I was so high and drunk that I thought the KGB was coming after me. When I woke up this morning, my mom told me that she's no longer paying for college. FML

by Noname / 02/20/2009 at 6:42pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Money

Today, in the forest, I hit my foot against a half-buried metal thing. I dug into the ground, and found a beautiful box, heavy enough to not be empty. I imagined myself with gold coins. Inside was the corpse of a cat. FML

by mainche / 01/20/2009 at 2:13am / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my boyfriend's mom tried to bribe him with an iPhone to dump me. He accepted. FML

by f'ed_over / 01/19/2009 at 6:12am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, a co-worker asked me if I had a comb he could borrow. I'm bald. FML

by poisonhand / 01/14/2009 at 10:32am / United States (Michigan) / Love