Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11104
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

woofer's page activity

Visits<b>jasonm27</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 2:11am<b>KingOfMexico</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 6:55pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 9:11am<b>kzarecor2019</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 7:15pm<b>kieman</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 2:33pm<b>PinkPoshling111</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 6:29pm<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 11:03pm<b>simplyblades</b> - the 06/23/2013 at 8:51pm<b>yer_maw</b> - the 05/11/2009 at 1:04pm<b>lizwriteslove</b> - the 04/28/2009 at 9:19pm<b>sammhasBADluck</b> - the 03/29/2009 at 8:29pm<b>Fabulousmeangirl</b> - the 03/29/2009 at 8:17pm<b>hellobirdie</b> - the 03/25/2009 at 3:20am<b>whitey</b> - the 03/24/2009 at 10:29pm<b>jesslackszazz</b> - the 03/24/2009 at 8:06pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 3:10pm

woofer's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

woofer's favorite FMLs

Today, at 4 AM, I locked myself out of my apartment. After calling friends in vain, I decided to just sit on the doorstep and wait for someone to come in. I sat for 10 minutes before a homeless man insisted threateningly that I move. I was kicked off my own front doorstep by a homeless man. FML

Today, I was walking through the park eating fries. There was an old woman feeding a few pigeons. They didn't seem too interested, so I threw some fries down as I walked by to try and help her out. About 2 minutes later, I heard screaming. A huge group of pigeons were attacking the old woman. FML


I agree, your life sucks (55241) - you deserved it (19284)

On 04/14/2009 at 10:07am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me over the phone. He said there was someone else, and that he has been in love with her for a while. Turns out, the new girl was his online video game character. I got dumped for a video game. FML


I agree, your life sucks (96935) - you deserved it (9076)

On 03/27/2009 at 1:12am - love - by w00tz (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML


I agree, your life sucks (264912) - you deserved it (35178)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I drunk dialed my mom and told her I was so high and drunk that I thought the KGB was coming after me. When I woke up this morning, my mom told me that she's no longer paying for college. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19285) - you deserved it (120929)

On 02/20/2009 at 6:42pm - money - by Noname (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, in the forest, I hit my foot against a half-buried metal thing. I dug into the ground, and found a beautiful box, heavy enough to not be empty. I imagined myself with gold coins. Inside was the corpse of a cat. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28811) - you deserved it (6346)

On 01/20/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by mainche - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out my boyfriend's mom tried to bribe him with an iPhone to dump me. He accepted. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33973) - you deserved it (2230)

On 01/19/2009 at 6:12am - love - by f'ed_over - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a co-worker asked me if I had a comb he could borrow. I'm bald. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24422) - you deserved it (2614)

On 01/14/2009 at 10:32am - love - by poisonhand - United States (Michigan)

Mselle Risa's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • FML Pics : The top 4 pics
  • They say that a picture is worth a boring bunch of words thrown at you by a corporate robot. That's true. Corporate robots are the worst. Anyway, the FML Pics app is still being downloaded all over the…

Tuesday 24 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: