About wiseKat99 : Haii I'm Kat!!! umm I am an animal person but I also like snakes and tarantulas. So I think I'd describe myself as right in between girly and tomboyish. I love four wheelers and dirt bikes and motorcycles!!!! Ok umm I love Chik-Fil-A. Not kidding. My favorite thing to eat is probably chicken. Umm I love shopping with my friends, it's always a good time! Message me if you wanna know more!!!
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wiseKat99's favorite FMLs
Today, I had to take an urgent dump at work. I noticed too late there was no toilet paper left, so I had to risk doing a quick "pants around the knees" shuffle to the next stall. I locked eyes with the window cleaner at the same time I heard someone enter from behind me. FML
by caught out / 04/26/2014 at 7:29pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Work
Today, I found out that my father faked his whole "mid-life crisis", just so he could gain my trust and get me to admit that I smoke weed, and to tell him who I buy it from. Hello year-long grounding. FML
by say no to dick / 04/18/2014 at 6:56pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by Someone / 04/15/2014 at 8:20pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
Today, my boyfriend stayed over at my place for the first time. I left him in the bedroom for a couple of minutes while I used the toilet, and when I came back, he was holding my vibrator. He angrily asked me, "What the hell is this? You know this is cheating, right?" FML
by Anonymous / 04/15/2014 at 12:37pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
Today, after a dental appointment, my lips were numb. On the bus on my way back home, the cutest girl smiled at me. In attempt to smile back, I forgot my lips were numb and ended up spitting my chewing gum at her. I had to switch buses. FML
by Anonymous / 04/14/2014 at 6:12am / Malta / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to work at the restaurant instead of going to the prom, which nobody asked me out to. For five hours, I got to shamefully greet and seat people on their way home from the prom, all of whom knew I was too lame to get asked out. FML
by annoyed teen / 04/12/2014 at 11:01pm / United States (Idaho) / Work
Today, I was on a date with my boyfriend. As we walked back home from the cinema, he was checking his phone, when suddenly someone grabbed it and ran off. I had to be the one to go run after the thug because my 23-year-old boyfriend froze on the spot, crying. FML
by Ieri / 04/12/2014 at 5:56pm / Albania / Love
by princess / 04/12/2014 at 5:01pm / United States (California) / Love
by BeatByA9yrold / 04/12/2014 at 3:59pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
by onlychild / 04/12/2014 at 2:22am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/12/2014 at 1:24am / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/11/2014 at 7:49pm / United Kingdom (Bristol, City of) / Kids
by babylove / 04/11/2014 at 5:58pm / South Africa / Kids
Today, my father took me out for some driving lessons. Out of nowhere, a huge, apparently suicidal bird dove into the windshield, putting a crack in it. My father yelled at me as if it was my fault, and is demanding I pay for the repairs. FML
by Anonymous / 04/11/2014 at 4:07pm / Switzerland / Money
Today, my dad hit his mid-life crisis. When I came home and said hi, he told me to shut up, then went to the living room. He then lit up a cigarette and started muttering about having to put up with me, then went into a coughing fit, because he's never smoked before in his life. FML
by Cuntlette / 04/11/2014 at 12:38pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right…