About whatsupitsbrian : Hey my names Ben and I'm looking for a nice b***ch to get it on with(; hmu. I have some blue eyes, I'm about 3 feet tall on all fours and I weigh almost 50 pounds(; all muscle
whatsupitsbrian's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
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You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
whatsupitsbrian's favorite FMLs
Today, I was reading in my apartment. Due to a heatwave and my lack of AC, I was completely naked. My cat jumped onto my lap, and as her claws dug into my stomach, I recoiled. This caused her to retreat, clawing at my nether regions in the process. My pussy mauled my pussy. FML
by Anonymous / 07/29/2013 at 5:18pm / United States / Animals
by Anonymous / 07/10/2013 at 12:38pm / United States (Ohio) / Kids
by Wtf / 07/10/2013 at 1:24am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by BlueB / 07/06/2013 at 11:42am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my husband was in our newborn's room, holding and talking to him. I guess he forgot the baby monitor, because I overheard him say, "Wanna know a secret? Daddy kills people." I really hope he was just quoting Dexter. FML
by imarriedanaxemurderer / 06/18/2013 at 1:01am / United States (Illinois) / Kids
by young grandpa / 06/17/2013 at 6:49pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids
Today, at my wedding, the minister forgot to skip the "does anyone object?" part. My mother stood up and gave a lengthy reason, which caused my future in-laws to start shouting. It turned into a small riot, and no, we're not married now. FML
by Anonymous / 06/12/2013 at 12:27pm / United States (Washington) / Love
by Anonymous / 06/08/2013 at 4:53pm / United Kingdom (Bromley) / Intimacy
by Kay / 06/02/2013 at 3:00pm / India (Andhra Pradesh) / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend decided to wake me up from a nap by kissing me. I started kissing her back passionately, when she slapped me. Apparently, kissing her back automatically without "confirming her identity" counts as cheating. FML
by Anonymous / 05/26/2013 at 8:21pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
Today, I realized my family is the textbook definition of redneck after listening to my grandpa threaten to smash with an excavator the trailer that my uncle lives in behind our house if he didn't return the set of tires he had stolen and pawned from my grandpa's garage. FML
by redneckfamily / 05/24/2013 at 3:06am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by Screwed Up / 05/09/2013 at 1:30am / United States / Health
by Carrie / 05/08/2013 at 1:41am / United States (California) / Health
by Anonymous / 05/06/2013 at 4:35am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous