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whatsupitsbrian

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whatsupitsbrian
  • Town/Country : California , USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 231
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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whatsupitsbrian's favorite FMLs

Today, in a drunken state, I decided that it would be a good idea to shave with a pizza cutter. FML

#19748828
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4365) - you deserved it (21438)

On 06/07/2012 at 8:10am - health - by Darwin_Award_Winner (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me in a restaurant in front of a lot of people. Once I said yes, some guy yelled out, "SEX. SEX. SEX." My boyfriend yelled back, "LATER!" FML

#19734660
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24667) - you deserved it (5489)

On 06/04/2012 at 7:50pm - intimacy - by BooBabe (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend and I were acting out a kinky scenario at home, where we'd met in a club and were having a one night stand. We ended up getting into a real argument about an imaginary girl in the club. I didn't have sex and we haven't spoken since. FML

#19687901
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10073) - you deserved it (29448)

On 05/27/2012 at 10:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was at a restaurant with my kids. I told my 13 year old about how the very first time she said she loved me. She was 2 and it was at this very restaurant. I told her the details and even started tearing up a little. She didn't even look up from her cell phone and said, "That's fab, ma." FML

#19603153
309 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25080) - you deserved it (7540)

On 05/10/2012 at 4:33pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I saw my boyfriend spitting the mouthwash back into the bottle, because, "this stuff is really expensive." FML

#19567272
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25239) - you deserved it (2050) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/03/2012 at 3:55am - misc - by Laura (woman) - France

Today, I told my fiancé I wanted to hear something romantic. He said, "My dick loves your mouth." I guess that's as good as it's going to get. FML

#19231360
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22334) - you deserved it (5638)

On 03/07/2012 at 1:16am - intimacy - by Sharibabi65 (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through a text message. In retaliation, I started typing a long list of everything I hate about her. Just as I pressed the send button, she text me again saying "Just joking. You know I'd never leave you. Love you babe :)" FML

#19211804
320 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35891) - you deserved it (24928)

On 03/04/2012 at 12:02am - love - by Autocorrected (man) - Philippines (Bulacan)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because, I "always wear that stupid little hat." I'm Jewish. FML

#19062488
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31804) - you deserved it (7559)

On 02/13/2012 at 1:00am - love - by Kevin (man) - United States

Today, I was texting the guy I like. He's really smart, funny, athletic, and cute. This all changed when he told me he was jacking off. FML

#18956321
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22975) - you deserved it (7772)

On 01/30/2012 at 9:50pm - intimacy - by idrathernotgiveoutmyname (woman) - Canada

Today, I was singing the National Anthem at a school game and totally forgot the words. So I kept singing the same two lines over and over. FML

#18788734
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13222) - you deserved it (28025)

On 01/12/2012 at 8:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while working at a pizza place with my girlfriend, I called my boss to tell him we were short on sausage. Under her breath I heard my girlfriend say, "sounds like somebody I know." FML

#18778131
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30756) - you deserved it (3861)

On 01/11/2012 at 7:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

#18733573
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19012) - you deserved it (37896)

On 01/07/2012 at 5:27am - intimacy - by Danny - Australia

Today, I went to a great concert. Against all odds, I got to meet the band. All I had for them to autograph was a flyer protesting their concert that was given to me on the way in. FML

#18732471
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22494) - you deserved it (4769)

On 01/07/2012 at 1:48am - misc - by elijahrobrt - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I texted my boyfriend on the way to the hospital to tell him I needed stitches, after my brother's dog bit me on the breast. His response? "Pics or it didn't happen." FML

#18643236
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26668) - you deserved it (4835)

On 12/29/2011 at 10:48am - health - by OH COME ON (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my parents gave me an iPhone. They then checked my grades online, and promptly took it away. FML

#18613210
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10950) - you deserved it (44123)

On 12/26/2011 at 1:35am - misc - by Paige - United States (California)



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