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  • Town/Country : Brussels, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 23 March 1984 (32 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1856
  • Number of comments : 352
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About vlalam : Stress and worries solve nothing.. lets lighten the mood, hit me up if u wanna chat..

vlalam's page activity

Visits<b>herecomestheboom</b> - the 09/23/2016 at 4:28am<b>Mons</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 3:39pm<b>ItnHmn</b> - the 08/25/2016 at 10:58pm<b>Tripartita</b> - the 08/19/2016 at 10:48pm<b>js48</b> - the 08/06/2016 at 11:27pm<b>EmZoWe</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 7:57pm<b>TheSiraffe</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 6:58pm<b>crazy_bananas</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 12:34am<b>demix</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 6:10am<b>Soggybuns123</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 6:03am<b>nwwaverider</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 8:12pm<b>andrmac</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 4:35pm<b>phantomxbg</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 9:49am<b>Celion91</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 7:30pm<b>LiveLaughLeah</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 8:58pm<b>AyeJay101</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 5:45pm<b>stewdogg40</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 6:57am<b>Brian2911</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 10:30pm

Fucked!<b>Celion91</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 1:31am<b>stewdogg40</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 11:57am<b>Hop6e</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 2:16am<b>AHzulu</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 5:15am<b>jayennachristine</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 5:55am<b>keiNan</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 4:29am<b>littleking94</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 9:59pm<b>StayFaithful</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 9:58am<b>Gabygonzalez9211</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 9:03pm<b>cedrayer</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 9:34pm<b>BananaCoconutty</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 3:14am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 11:42am<b>david99021</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 9:54pm<b>_mittlieder_</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 5:28am<b>UserNamePending</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 8:18am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 5:43pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 5:10am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 4:31am

vlalam's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of vlalam's badges

vlalam's favorite FMLs

Today, I went out to dinner for my mom's birthday. I'd planned for a nice restaurant which is always packed, so I'd called for a reservation. When we got there, the hostess tried to turn us down because no one ever takes their mother out to dinner anymore, and that I was a fraud. FML

by jesterinperil / 02/16/2015 at 5:38pm / United States / Money

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my phone rang just seconds after I left a conference meeting to go use the restroom. It wouldn't have been a problem, except it seems one of my friends thought it would be funny to change my ringtone to a woman having an orgasm. FML

by King_of_hearts / 04/04/2014 at 7:46pm / United States (Indiana) / Work

Today, my girlfriend decided to let me know that she almost left me for another guy not so long ago, because he was more handsome and talented than me. The reason she didn't leave: "He's out of my league; you're not." FML

by Anonymous / 07/12/2013 at 12:53pm / United States / Love

Today, my daughter had ice cream while I was napping. She didn't want me to know so she put the bowl in the trashcan and put the spoon in the garbage disposal and turned it on, because she thought it would make the spoon disappear. FML

by cherbear1000 / 06/17/2013 at 12:33am / United States (Maryland) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend asked if I could grow out my pubic hair since I usually wax it. He said his mom has a full bush and he always thought it looks better that way. FML

by notyourmom / 06/11/2013 at 8:00am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

Today, my wife uttered the soul-crushing words, "But we're married now, why would we have sex?" FML

by ._. / 06/04/2013 at 8:08pm / United Kingdom (Bedfordshire) / Intimacy

Today, I finally got the courage to make a move on the guy I've been crushing on. I asked him if he would like to go see a movie with me. He answered, "Sorry, I've already seen it." I didn't even mention any particular movie. FML

by Anonymous / 05/09/2013 at 3:01am / United States / Love

Today, I was eating out with a group of friends and my boyfriend. During the meal, I accidentally took a sip from my male friend's glass. My boyfriend pointed and said, "Babe, you took his drink." My friend responded by putting his arm round me and saying, "Whatever, I took her virginity." FML

by everyoneheard / 03/28/2013 at 11:11am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

Today, I saw my reflection in the computer screen and I thought I looked quite nice. I tried to take a screenshot. FML

by Mikaela / 05/31/2012 at 11:25pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom left for a business trip. Thinking it was a good time to throw a party, I mass messaged everyone on my contact list. I thought it was going to be a success. The problem with this? My mom is on my contacts list. She replied "I'll be home in an hour. You're grounded." FML

by mass message / 10/15/2011 at 8:47pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After several minutes of me freaking out and him explaining how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was the best thus far. FML

by youreajoker / 11/10/2010 at 5:28am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, I couldn't fall asleep till 3am and was woken approximately every hour or so. Why? I found out my new upstairs neighbors have a very active love life. She's a screamer. FML

by SleeplessInSoCal / 08/09/2010 at 2:18am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was texting my crush. I tried to say, "I need a nap," but my iPhone changed it to "I need anal." I sent it. FML

by Allie / 06/03/2010 at 2:58pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I finally told my parents I would be changing bedrooms because I could no longer stand hearing them having sex, which is awkward and disturbing. Later, my dad came and asked me quietly if I thought my mom sounded "satisfied." FML

by fmjob / 07/21/2009 at 12:39am / Canada (New Brunswick) / Intimacy