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vespergreen

Offline (the 11/04/2014 at 1:58am) | Search for a member

vespergreen

11Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3951
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About vespergreen : I got to stay high all my life to forget I'm missing you.

vespergreen's page activity

Visits<b>NikhilBajaj</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 2:15pm<b>elusiveshame</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 2:37pm<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 3:24am<b>pickles1994</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 10:42pm<b>Zach_attack_</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 1:16am<b>Toughsky</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 3:27pm<b>Rebekahxxx</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 5:55pm<b>karaanne21</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 9:00pm<b>christian1509</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 3:43pm<b>robsmit98</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 6:01pm<b>parkerhicks__</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 9:24pm<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 4:33pm<b>allybae_aye</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 10:15pm<b>Journiexo</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 10:14pm<b>Naaaah</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 4:15pm<b>Paultheouctopus</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 3:32am<b>travisrwr</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 10:34pm<b>thepurplewalrus</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 5:03pm

Fucked!<b>elusiveshame</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 8:37pm<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 8:24am<b>pickles1994</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 3:42am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 5:24am<b>christian1509</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 11:12pm<b>minutepoet</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 5:44am<b>hobosapien081</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 11:45pm<b>IspSG</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 11:39pm<b>isorang</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 4:22pm<b>alitaba21fx</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 12:42pm<b>vanessa_tranz</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 5:16am

vespergreen's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of vespergreen's badges

vespergreen's favorite FMLs

Today, my store manager thought that it would improve morale to talk in hashtags. FML

#21072669
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36427) - you deserved it (3297)

On 02/26/2014 at 10:28pm - work - by Lori_ftw - United States (California)

Today, I was babysitting an 8-year-old boy. He was playing with play-doh and made a sculpture that resembled a penis. I tried to cover up and asked if it was an action figure. He looked at me like I was an idiot and said, "It's a DICK." FML

#21069587
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44129) - you deserved it (5607)

On 02/23/2014 at 5:27pm - kids - by hot sweet.... not (woman) - United Kingdom (Renfrewshire)

Today, I was chilling out with my friend in a parking lot, when a police officer came up to the vehicle and suspiciously asked what we were up to. My friend sarcastically said, "Uh, doing drugs? Planning a drive-by? Haha!" We soon found ourselves in the back of a cop car. FML

#21067749
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36827) - you deserved it (17208)

On 02/21/2014 at 4:37pm - misc - by Cuntface McGee (man) - Romania (Cluj)

Today, I was beating the hell out of one of the most useless employees ever. I mean really laying into him, all while telling him for the umpteenth time how to do his job right. Then my husband informed me I was hitting him in my sleep. FML

#21066977
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35947) - you deserved it (6885)

On 02/20/2014 at 9:31pm - work - by management - United States

Today, during an important exam, I had a huge panic attack and had to run out of the exam hall. Everyone saw me, and now everywhere I go, people keep pretending to have a panic attack and run away from me. I have to spend two more years with these assholes. FML

Today, while playing a big basketball game, I had to run urgently to the bathroom because of a really hard diarrhea. I took the ball. FML

#21055217
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39064) - you deserved it (7507)

On 02/09/2014 at 9:36am - misc - by took it - United States (New York)

Today, while at a funeral for a distant family member, I was giving my condolences to the family. When one of them asked how I was doing, I replied with, "I'm still alive!", which is one of my standard responses due to being a cashier and being asked that question a hundred times a day. FML

Today, I was singing in the shower but couldn't hit the higher notes. My wife complained and 2 minutes later she ran a tap causing my shower to go freezing. I shrieked. My wife said my pitch was still wrong. FML

#21048056
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39669) - you deserved it (8070)

On 02/02/2014 at 11:53am - misc - by deargodthepain (man) - United States

Today, I finally finished making my daughter's wedding cake. When I checked on it later, I found a large slice had been cut out. I soon found out that my husband had instagrammed himself eating it, with the caption "#guiltypleasures". FML

#21046154
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47279) - you deserved it (4022)

On 01/31/2014 at 11:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I have the flu. I woke up to my son leaning over me, inches from my face, breathing in deeply. Apparently, he was trying to get sick so he could stay home from school. He's 15. FML

#21034785
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47927) - you deserved it (5195)

On 01/21/2014 at 6:07am - kids - by sickmom (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was in a market in France, and went to ask the seller for some potatoes. I speak fluent French, but I got flustered and instead of saying "pomme de terre", which is the French for potato, I said "pomme de merde". I literally asked for an "apple of shit". FML

Today, there was a forest fire in my town. I was still forced to go to school, as it was safer. A lot of people decided not to go, and we ended up doing nothing but watching the news reports. There, I got to see my house burning on live TV. FML

#21030359
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67798) - you deserved it (4155)

On 01/16/2014 at 10:42pm - misc - by Fire sucks. (man) - United States

Today, I found out that whenever my ex-wife is late getting the kids to school, she tells them to tell their teachers they were with me, and forges my name on the sign-in sheet. Missing homework? Dad's house. Forgot to bring something important? Ditto. The school thinks I'm a horrible parent. FML

Today, and every other night since my new neighbors moved in two weeks ago, their cat has been standing outside my house meowing constantly up at my window, where my cat keeps standing and meowing back. It's like a feline version of Romeo and Juliet, and I can't sleep. FML

#21024543
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45962) - you deserved it (4944)

On 01/11/2014 at 1:52pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional)



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