underguarded

Search for a member

Offline (the 12/03/2014 at 12:17am)

underguarded

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3235
  • Number of comments : 504
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About underguarded : I like to ask, 'is that popcorn ?' After I silently let out a fart.

underguarded's page activity

Visits<b>EwahWeeWah</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 10:10am<b>plastix</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 2:18am<b>n_a_v_y</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 4:29am<b>LowExpectations</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 7:48pm<b>WhiteCrimson</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 9:24am<b>FerrisFailsLife</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 11:00am<b>Kitty1811</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 3:11pm<b>mcronin</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 1:32pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 7:52am<b>StiffPvtParts</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 6:16pm<b>adamant84</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 9:06pm<b>C7</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 6:56pm<b>Caro97songs</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 5:44pm<b>facelick</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 10:57pm<b>Angsty_Armadillo</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 2:47am<b>dmcintosh</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 1:15pm<b>emobitch1022</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 1:35pm<b>gdeekay</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 1:33pm

Fucked!<b>Mukuro</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 12:56am

underguarded's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

See all of underguarded's badges

underguarded's favorite FMLs

Today, I was woken up at 6am to the sound of my mother on the back deck of the house hooting like an owl. FML

by tireedddddd / 11/25/2011 at 11:24am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, like every day, I used my phone while taking a dump. As I reached for some toilet paper to wipe myself, my sister pounded on the door for me to hurry up. I yelled "Fine," and without realizing it, wiped myself with my phone. FML

by shootme / 11/13/2011 at 5:46pm / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, I was hurriedly doing laundry. I threw a second load in the dryer and slammed the door shut. All of a sudden, I heard scratching and whining coming from the dryer. My cat probably hates me now. FML

by benji / 11/01/2011 at 3:02pm / United States (Michigan) / Animals

Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML

by lolilovemyboyfriend / 10/19/2011 at 10:37am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML

by adieuvelib / 10/14/2011 at 9:53pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I met an old friend, with whom I have a complicated history and we hooked up. He came before we even started. In his sleep, he pushed me out of the bed. When I woke up, he had peed himself in his sleep. Glad I let that ship sail. FML

by CC / 10/11/2011 at 10:51am / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Intimacy

Today, while taking a stroll in the park, a kid walked up to me and asked, "Do you believe in unicorns?" I answered, "No." He dunked his ice cream cone on my head, laughed hysterically, and ran off screaming, "BELIEVE!" FML

by unicorn / 09/13/2011 at 5:21pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally got intimate with the girl I like. As I started lifting her shirt, she stuck her hand down my pants and grabbed my junk. She immediately stopped what she was doing, snickered, and calmly said, "Take me home." FML

by Anonymous / 09/04/2011 at 12:21pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, at my job as a lifeguard, the kids in the pool decided to start a new game. The game involved spreading out to different parts of the pool and pretending to be drowning at the same time. Whoever was "saved" first, won. FML

by zain / 06/04/2011 at 2:15am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, at my job as a lifeguard, the kids in the pool decided to start a new game. The game involved spreading out to different parts of the pool and pretending to be drowning at the same time. Whoever was "saved" first, won. FML

by zain / 06/04/2011 at 2:15am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, my sister and I were eating at Wendy's. On the way out, I thought it would be funny to kick the door open and yell, "This is Sparta!" I lost my balance and fell flat on my butt. FML

by taydean / 05/26/2011 at 5:31pm / United States (Colorado) / Health

Today, I went into the women's bathroom and was warmly greeted by a man masturbating on one of the sinks. FML

by Jill / 04/09/2011 at 6:00pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I finally confessed my feelings to my long time crush. He was the only one I've been able to muster up the courage to open up to. He replied "lmao" and hasn't texted back since. FML

by notfunny / 04/08/2011 at 9:39pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I was startled awake at 4am by a loud and awful sound. Completely serious, I asked my fiancé if he had just shit his pants. His response: giggles followed by a softly whispered "maybe". FML

by Anonymous / 02/01/2011 at 8:43am / United States / Love

Today, I was naked on top of my boyfriend looking lovingly into his eyes. He then started to use my boobs as punching bags while singing "Eye of the Tiger". FML

by nemo518 / 12/23/2010 at 1:36am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy