Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (the 06/13/2014 at 6:29am) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 256
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About ukeandfoodislife : I like FML and have had the app since 2011(:
just got an account tho... So hi:)

I remember when Enslaved, Perdix, and Docbastard literally ruled FML.

If you're here, it's probably for one of 2 reasons.

One, I wrote a really lame comment and you want to further gawk at my low IQ, or two, I wrote a kick-ass comment and you would like to learn more about me. I'd rather not write a lot here, so message me if you wanna learn more(:

Anyways, hey! Have a wonderful day(:

ukeandfoodislife's page activity

Visits<b>XQuartzX</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 4:20pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 3:05pm<b>lilviking</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 6:19am<b>Nordrag</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 2:22am<b>sherbear78</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 2:53pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 9:38pm<b>gumglue</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 4:41pm<b>moonriseriver</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 6:15am<b>schwaka</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 12:32pm<b>Bloink</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 8:18pm<b>iireenee</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 5:12pm<b>andy594328</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 2:43pm<b>MRP360</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 2:52am<b>miianah1</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 1:33am<b>Mexico_WC2018</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 10:08pm<b>zingline89</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 7:13pm<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 6:47pm<b>lannisters</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 6:34pm

ukeandfoodislife's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.


You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of ukeandfoodislife's badges

ukeandfoodislife's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home from vacation, only to find my neighbours relaxing on my patio, and their kids swimming in my pool. FML


I agree, your life sucks (50804) - you deserved it (4372)

On 07/03/2014 at 12:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, it's my birthday. My next-door neighbours gave me a stool and some rope. FML


I agree, your life sucks (56400) - you deserved it (5219) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/01/2014 at 12:55am - love - by NosChersVoisins - France (Aquitaine)

Today, my sweet 7-month-old puppy ran up to a big fat dog at the park and did what she always does: roll over on her back to start to play. The big fat dog lifted his leg and peed all over my puppy's belly. After the shock, my soaking wet puppy jumped on me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47879) - you deserved it (5385)

On 06/26/2014 at 12:57am - animals - by Pisser (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, after 2 weeks of not having sex, my pregnant girlfriend and I finally fooled around. This was immediately followed by her bursting into tears and begging me to make her a ham steak. FML


I agree, your life sucks (40004) - you deserved it (9227)

On 02/02/2013 at 9:41am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

FML's blog

  • Angie's illustrated FML
  • Here we go again. This week I'm talking to you live from the Paris Japan Expo. I'm dressed up as Bernard from the Sailor Moon series, and I almost got kicked out because my katana wasn't the…

Friday 3 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: