uhnevermind

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Offline (the 04/25/2016 at 7:15pm)

uhnevermind

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 30 April 1987 (29 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1506
  • Number of comments : 110
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

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uhnevermind's page activity

Visits<b>stingray112</b> - the 04/23/2016 at 11:35am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 4:38am<b>Carmel430</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 4:03pm<b>Ladiesman679</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 3:40am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 11:50am<b>DragonDude</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 3:23am<b>NoOneElse999</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 6:01pm<b>FitFriday</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 4:07pm<b>jazmin3012</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 12:24pm<b>AngryRussianGuy</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 1:55pm<b>xReDMemory</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 4:10pm<b>Fidge86</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 4:32pm<b>adam97</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 12:52pm<b>heroeurope</b> - the 10/14/2013 at 3:07am<b>SammyRider</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 8:58pm<b>k_gils</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 6:43pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 7:47am<b>kinsmas</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 11:09pm

Fucked!<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 10:38am<b>FitFriday</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 10:07pm

uhnevermind's FML badges

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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uhnevermind's favorite FMLs

Today, I was working drive thru and took a huge order. When the people pulled around to the window, they handed me a stack of coupons. None of the coupons were even related to what they ordered. They made me change their order to fit the coupons because they couldn't read. FML

by MEW / 09/20/2009 at 8:38pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I took my 5 year-old son to the barber shop. When the man finishes with him, I tell the guy, "while we're here, I might as well get a trim too." My son then exclaims very loudly in front of a very full barber's shop, "Dad! You don't need a haircut, you need hair!" FML

by ben / 09/18/2009 at 2:17am / United States (Utah) / Kids

Today, while talking to my boyfriend, I was frantically searching for my cell phone. He was curious as to what I was doing so I told him. There was long silence followed by laughter. He could hardly breathe as he told me, "Honey you're on your phone talking to me." FML

by hunnydoll / 08/17/2009 at 8:16pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML

by ....... / 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, a telemarketer called for my dad. Jokingly, I said, "I haven't seen him for like five days...I'm starting to get worried," in my best child-like voice. Apparently the telemarketer called Child Protective Services. I'm 20. FML

by Telemistake / 04/30/2009 at 2:03pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was running down the hallway when a door opens and hits me right on the face. I'm sitting there with my nose bleeding and a huge bump forming on my head. The guy who comes out is hugely fat, tries to help me up, trips, and falls on me. I accidentally groped his moobs while trying to push him off. FML

by LizLiao / 04/14/2009 at 3:50am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I got on an elevator with a woman and her child. I was the first one on. When she stepped on, the capacity alarm went off. As she left she told her daughter that's why fat people shouldn't be allowed in public. I'm 145 lbs. She was twice my size. I got called fat by a hippopotamus. FML

by warp_routine / 03/31/2009 at 10:17am / United States (Vermont) / Health

Today, we got our yearbooks for school. I opened to my profile to see that they misspelled my first name which is James. They wrote Lames. FML

by rusty2020 / 03/25/2009 at 12:32pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML

by ScoobieDoo / 03/20/2009 at 12:15am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, my boss forgot her meeting with an official from the military base and called to ask me to handle it. The very cute Marine showed up that afternoon and we talked for an hour. After he left, I realized I had forgotten about the paper mustache I taped to my face for fun that morning. FML

by Jaeda / 03/12/2009 at 4:04pm / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, I was masturbating into a sock when I felt something on my cock. I quickly ripped the sock off and threw it on the floor... and watched a huge spider come scurrying out. I just inadvertently fucked a spider. FML

by SpiderMan / 03/11/2009 at 8:23pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I was writing an email to our entire company regarding a fundraiser we are taking part in for children and adults with disabilities. I was rushing to get the email out and hit send before I realized that instead of "Best Regards" I had typed "Best Retards" as the closing line. FML

by Can't Spell Worth A Damn / 03/06/2009 at 1:53pm / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, I was talking to my mom. During the conversation she asked me, "Does he take his leg off when you guys are having sex?" Referring to the guy I've been seeing who has a prosthetic leg. My dad then asked, "Does he beat you with it too if you've been naughty?" FML

by Girl123999 / 03/04/2009 at 6:07pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, an extremely large lady came into the dry cleaners where I work. She puts what I assume is a blanket on the counter to be dry cleaned. I said, "So just the one blanket then?" She replied, "Those are my pants, not a blanket." She was a size 56. FML

by Kasizzle / 02/26/2009 at 9:13am / United States (Colorado) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.