tyMate

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Offline (the 09/15/2016 at 11:25pm)

tyMate

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 708
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About tyMate : Hi! :)

tyMate's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 2:52pm<b>Anno007</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 9:29am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 9:32pm<b>colton_colton</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 1:55am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 4:35pm<b>austinssquidgy</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 10:28pm<b>dreamtime1</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 7:56pm<b>JessieMae1990</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 9:32pm<b>JoshArson</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 9:03am<b>Dantheman9002</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 2:45pm<b>blueman_17</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 11:25am<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 7:42am<b>shady_fox77</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 12:31am<b>Deadpool47</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 10:31pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 4:50pm<b>CUrraNT</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 4:04am<b>EverestMelting</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 11:12pm<b>sixwaystilsunday</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 4:07pm

tyMate's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of tyMate's badges

tyMate's favorite FMLs

Today, I was taking a piss, when a mosquito came out of nowhere and headed straight for my dick. In my startled attempt to ward it away, I pissed all over everything, including myself. FML

by pissed off / 05/16/2014 at 8:33pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom stopped playing badminton with me because she claimed I was too aggressive. Apparently winning, playing by the rules, and smashing is considered aggressive. FML

by moms a baby / 03/30/2014 at 10:44pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was texting an artist friend telling her I wanted to buy her paintings; going on and on about how much I wanted it and loved the way they looked and couldn't wait to have them. I realized my phone had corrected paintings to panties. FML

by BigBlue / 03/19/2014 at 7:19pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, in the middle of a Spanish oral exam, I start to panic. My teacher suggests I say whatever pops into my head. I blurt out, "Heeey Macarena!" FML

by LeChameauTrisomique / 03/14/2014 at 12:33am / France (Centre) / Work

Today, I was at the library, working with some classmates on our major semester project. I accidentally killed power to the row of computers by me. I've never had so many enraged faces looking at me before. FML

by AnonymousQuagga / 02/06/2014 at 10:07pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I was walking down the street and saw a man trip over a sign. He then grabbed his cane, started screaming, and began beating the sign. Apparently that didn't release his anger, so he began to beat the nearest car. I thought it was hilarious, until I noticed it was my car. FML

by mylifesucks / 07/10/2013 at 4:10pm / United States (Georgia) / Transportation

Today, my girlfriend asked me if she looked fat in her new pair of jeans. Knowing I was probably about two seconds away from all hell breaking loose, I instinctively tried to save my game, before remembering I wasn't playing a video game. I really need to get a life. FML

by Anonymous / 02/03/2013 at 4:57pm / Australia / Love

Today, my girlfriend yelled at me for breathing too much. FML

by cj123 / 12/23/2011 at 3:43am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told a guy at work about my boyfriend. His immediate response was to ask me if I was making him up. He's the third person to react this way. FML

by UglyApparently / 10/05/2011 at 12:03pm / United Kingdom (Leeds) / Work

Today, my fiancé played Rockband drums from the bathroom while taking a crap. He actually managed to properly hit notes. FML

by Anonymous / 09/07/2011 at 7:02pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I picked up on a telemarketer and started speaking in Portuguese. It turns out that this particular telemarketer spoke it as well. Every time I hung up, he called back. Telemarketers get really excited when they find out someone else speaks their language. FML

by Anonymous / 04/19/2011 at 11:05pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (Wiltshire) / Geek

Today, I found out that if you cry yourself sleep and forget to take off your mascara, your top and bottom lashes will stick together. Leaving you unable to open your eyes. FML

by chelsea / 03/07/2011 at 5:23pm / Health

Today, I took my iPod to Walmart to replace the battery. They tell me to call Apple. I go home again and call Apple. They tell me to call Walmart. I call Walmart. They tell me to bring it in. FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2010 at 6:04pm / United States (New York) / Geek

Today, I was at a public pool. A very fat kid yelled, "Cannon Ball!" He jumped right on me. FML

by Collin / 06/10/2010 at 3:59pm / United States (New Jersey) / Health