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turtles4life

Offline (14 hours ago) | Search for a member

turtles4life

2Fucked!

turtles4lifeturtles4life
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1939
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About turtles4life : I love animals and my pic is of my new puppy Loki! I also have a kitty and she is my baby ❤️

turtles4life's page activity

Visits<b>Miss_Whipped</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 3:41am<b>whoaitsamber</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 1:49pm<b>eureka03</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 9:10am<b>alcalaboy5</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 12:10pm<b>HairIsEverything</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 11:13am<b>SystemofaBlink41</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 11:41am<b>Epiccake</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 4:54pm<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 10:11am<b>Clam_igger</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 2:59pm<b>mrjc</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 1:25pm<b>ilovemsminaj</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 7:59am<b>olpally</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 1:12am<b>Raleaf</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 12:57am<b>DylanHasClass</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 12:49am<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 11:35pm<b>Lesser</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 10:03pm<b>cutycat136</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 8:15pm<b>ironhead</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 7:58pm

Fucked!<b>Lesser</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 4:03am<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 5:06pm

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turtles4life's favorite FMLs

Today, my little sister filled the huge house I spent over a week building in Minecraft with TNT. She then demanded I give her all the money in my wallet, or she'd blow it all up. She's now $86.25 richer, and my parents think it's too hilarious to make her give me my money back. FML

#21399271
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21609) - you deserved it (18470)

On 04/24/2015 at 11:23pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I caught my teenage daughter doing her laundry for the first time ever. She had piles of black and white, but then she threw them together in the washing machine. I told her blacks and whites were supposed to be separate, but she just said, "End the segregation, mom." FML

#21392458
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29223) - you deserved it (5014)

On 04/12/2015 at 4:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, at a mind-numbingly boring support session, everyone was talking about their hardships. One guy was talking about losing his leg in a car accident. I was half-asleep and asked without thinking, "Did you ever find it?" I almost shat my pants at the roomful of death glares that followed. FML

#21389976
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16733) - you deserved it (31715)

On 04/08/2015 at 12:08pm - misc - by S to the HIT (man) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up this morning in a panic. Last night, I heard scratching at my door, but I thought it was just my cat and went back to sleep. This morning, it hit me that my cat is 600 miles away living with my mom in Iowa. I'm terrified to even sleep now. FML

#21370427
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61) - you deserved it (2564)

On 03/08/2015 at 10:41am - animals - by no salt, no burning, just STFU (man) - United States

Today, while walking out of a store eating a candy bar, a homeless man tried to run up and steal my candy. I stuck a leg out and tripped him. The only thing I could think of to yell at him was, "Swiper no Swiping". My kids have ruined my coolness. FML

#21366982
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58) - you deserved it (18)

On 03/02/2015 at 11:57pm - misc - by Dad (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was doing laundry, so I decided to wash my cat's blanket. He chased me down the stairs into the basement, and I slightly closed the door behind me so he wouldn't follow me. He pushed the door shut, which automatically locks. I was trapped down there for 3 hours until my mom came home. FML

#21364131
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25741) - you deserved it (4958)

On 02/26/2015 at 7:08pm - animals - by jynxisadouchebag - United States (California)

Today, I was ringing up a woman at work. I saw she'd bought a birthday cake, so I smiled and said I hope whoever it was for has a happy birthday. She looked at me in disgust, told me to mind my own business, then called me a "chucklefuck bitch". Okay then. FML

#21345551
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28516) - you deserved it (2235)

On 01/28/2015 at 10:01am - work - by retailshell (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I witnessed my very overweight cat trying to jump over my fence, only to shit himself half way up, and then land in it. FML

Today, I realized my anger management has hit a new low when I screamed at a goose for being a goose. FML

#21309384
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27822) - you deserved it (7536)

On 12/01/2014 at 11:38am - misc - by WickedLittleDoll - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was selling winter-themed cookies at my university. I cheerfully asked a girl if she would like to buy cookies to support peer tutoring. Her response? "I don't eat food." FML

#21303227
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31523) - you deserved it (3537)

On 11/21/2014 at 8:51am - misc - by UTRejected (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I volunteered to tutor a 17-year-old girl in science. I had to explain in detail of what the real Big Bang theory was, as she only knew about the show. Later, I heard I was reported by her because apparently, "I was trying to convert her to Scientology." I now know why she needed a tutor. FML

Today, my 9-year-old daughter was acting out and wouldn't do her homework. I told her that if she didn't study, she wouldn't get her acceptance letter from Hogwarts. She looked into my eyes, straight through to my soul and said, "Hogwarts isn't real, retard." FML

#21280509
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34447) - you deserved it (12316)

On 10/18/2014 at 3:29pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I learned that if you give a squirrel a cookie, he'll climb up your pants in search of more cookies. FML

Today, coming home, I opened up my door to find my drunk boyfriend trying to teach our three baby parakeets to perch on his erect penis. FML

#21278553
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35683) - you deserved it (3742)

On 10/15/2014 at 7:36pm - misc - by facepalm (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I woke up to a mouse sitting on my pillow and chewing on my hair. FML

#21271220
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35681) - you deserved it (3041)

On 10/05/2014 at 1:04pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)



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