About ttelracs : My name is Scarlett (Ttelracs backwards) and I am 100% not funny, so I do my best to not try to be but it can be hard to resist sometimes. I apologize in advance. Most of my input on here involves cynical comments, sarcasm, and rejected FML's. I am also very awkard.
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ttelracs's favorite FMLs
by SierraDiaz2097 / 03/23/2013 at 1:44am / United States (Mississippi) / Love
by nraecher / 03/23/2013 at 12:43am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
Today, my psycho abstinence-only sex ed teacher claimed condoms give 50% protection at most against pregnancy. I couldn't help but correct her. She apologized for her "mistake", saying, "It's just that we're not ALL sluts, Kara." Now everyone thinks I'm a raging whore. FML
by Anonymous / 03/22/2013 at 8:34pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by eww. / 03/22/2013 at 1:28am / Australia / Love
Today, I found out my mom thought I was a lesbian because I dated a girl in high school. I didn't date anyone in high school. Apparently, guys never asked me out because my best friend told everyone that I was her girlfriend. I had a two-year lesbian relationship that I never knew about. FML
by SmallAngel / 03/21/2013 at 8:35pm / United States (Colorado) / Love
Today, I woke up to my cat giving birth, on my bed. I adopted her from a friend, who told me she was spayed. Now I have a giant mess and a cat who won't let me move either her or her babies. Guess I'm sleeping on the couch for a while. FML
by DommeAshlee / 03/21/2013 at 2:42pm / South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal) / Animals
by ldn / 03/21/2013 at 1:54pm / Slovenia (Bohinj) / Intimacy
Today, I was walking by the side of the interstate because my car broke down. A nice young man stopped and asked if I was tired of walking. I said yes, to which he replied, "Try jogging asshole" then laughed and drove off. It was raining balls. FML
by WetWalking / 03/21/2013 at 9:31am / United States (Texas) / Transportation
Today, there was a new girl in one of my classes. We both corrected a classmate on his grammar, so, trying to make a new friend, I leaned back to her and said, "Haha, fellow Grammar Nazi?" She gave me a disgusted look and told me she was Jewish. FML
by Anonymous / 03/21/2013 at 6:43am / United States (Michigan) / Work
by me / 03/21/2013 at 6:25am / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Miscellaneous
by seamonkeys / 03/21/2013 at 5:42am / United States / Kids
by tspence / 03/20/2013 at 6:08pm / United States (Ohio) / Kids
by Anonymous / 03/20/2013 at 12:08pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
by lp525252 / 03/20/2013 at 6:59am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
Today, I found a purse in the school bathroom. When I looked inside, there was an iPod along with some other expensive stuff in it. I took it to the office so the right owner would get it back. The owner passed me in the hall on the way there; she freaked out and punched me in the face. FML
by really? / 03/20/2013 at 12:55am / United States / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…