trucanadian

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trucanadian

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 31 December 1989 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 37182
  • Number of comments : 55
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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trucanadian's page activity

Visits<b>standley1212</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 11:28pm<b>welp_alright</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 2:01pm<b>melons</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 8:12pm<b>redstone7693</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 10:55pm<b>malishka18</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 11:22pm<b>xKrisSmoove</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 11:42am<b>ldkmnh</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 4:15am<b>RarityRoyale</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 12:11am<b>TheUndepented</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 12:29am<b>coolguy24301</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 3:43pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 2:10am<b>lisaint</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 4:15pm<b>bethluvsyou</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 4:11am<b>lzmo</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 6:20pm<b>dancerkatie95</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 2:50am<b>katiembee</b> - the 06/14/2013 at 6:01pm<b>jk811</b> - the 05/07/2013 at 12:27am<b>PIEMAN2014</b> - the 01/04/2013 at 6:23pm

trucanadian's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

trucanadian's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

by creepermagnet / 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

by creepermagnet / 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, it was really windy and rainy causing me to trip and knock into a little kid. While still gathering myself, I apologized and patted the kid on its' head. Then I see people around me starting to laugh. I turn and look at the kid, and discover I've been interacting with a trash can. FML

by trashcanned / 04/06/2009 at 7:47am / United States (Virginia) / Kids

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

by konens_dick / 03/22/2009 at 6:38am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I was having sex with a guy I met and in the middle of it his mother called him. After stopping to answer the phone, he tried to put me on with her because she didn't believe anyone would actually sleep with him. FML

by MarMar / 03/15/2009 at 4:47pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I decided to tell my mom about my choice to wait to have sex until after marriage. Coming from a very christian family I thought she would be proud. Instead she laughed and said, "is that your excuse for not being able to get laid?" and walked out of the room. FML

by sucks / 03/12/2009 at 1:53pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I walked behind a girl I hooked up with last weekend while she was on the computer in the library. I noticed she was looking at my facebook page and got excited. Then I heard her say to her friend, "This is the one smallest penis I have ever seen." FML

by Noname / 03/11/2009 at 4:29pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I tried to prove to my dad that he snores by secretly putting a tape recorder under his bed. I soon found out my parents had sex that night. Apparently, my mom likes to talk dirty. FML

by Zack / 03/11/2009 at 2:57pm / Israel (Tel Aviv) / Intimacy

Today, while showering in my dorm, a hand reaches through the curtain and grabs my ass. I hit the person on the other side of the curtain. He opened the curtain thinking that I was his girlfriend. He apologized and he had sex with his girlfriend in the shower stall next to me. FML

by Noname / 03/11/2009 at 3:37am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time in our relationship and it was great. He drove me back to my house and walked me to the door, then instead of kissing me goodbye he patted me on the back. Twice. FML

by petpeeeve / 03/10/2009 at 10:53pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was the only one in an elevator when an attractive girl came in, talking on her phone. She told her friend, "I have to go, there's a cute guy on this elevator." Before I could even react, she turned to me and said, "Sorry for lying, I really wanted to get off the phone with her." FML

by TuralSucks / 03/10/2009 at 9:10pm / United States (Nebraska) / Love

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was having birthday dinner with my girlfriend and her parents, when her Dad asked what I got her she replied "He said he was going to give me a Pearl Necklace when we get home." I realized then that my girlfriend did not know what I meant by 'Pearl Necklace.' FML

by Ethan / 03/09/2009 at 9:35am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

Today, I opened my birthday present from my grandfather. It was a map of the USA color coded by regional percentage of available men. FML

by Noname / 03/07/2009 at 11:28pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter asked me when was the first time I had sex. After I told her 22 she quickly shouted, "Beat ya!" She's thirteen. FML

by Noname / 03/06/2009 at 2:04pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy