Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

torio123

Offline (yesterday at 4:35pm) | Search for a member

torio123

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 27 June 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3729
  • Number of comments : 83
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About torio123 : don't touch me

torio123's page activity

Visits<b>Toughsky</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 1:25pm<b>Mitchellbassists</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 6:57pm<b>darrend1196</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 1:05am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 10:40pm<b>BlankSteve</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 5:18pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 3:11pm<b>yewanchor</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 4:08pm<b>garadan1</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 1:22am<b>JR7ISME</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 2:02pm<b>silon5</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 8:45pm<b>CamS115</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 1:06pm<b>LittlestPrincess</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 3:28am<b>decimater</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 11:00pm<b>blackhawkdown69</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 1:03am<b>sillylittlesheep</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 3:58am<b>Demonking</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 8:55am<b>ThatSlappinBass</b> - the 02/07/2014 at 6:28pm<b>AGhost5445</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 9:01pm

torio123's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

You sure know how to party?

You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

See all of torio123's badges

torio123's favorite FMLs

Today, the kids I babysit hid from me. While I was looking for them, I stepped on multiple strategically-placed Lego bricks. When I yelped from the pain, the kids jumped out and threw soccer balls in my face. FML

#20556944
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39130) - you deserved it (4862)

On 03/23/2013 at 7:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was feeling generous, so I made my roommate's favorite meal for her when she got home. When she did return home, she flipped her shit for no reason, screaming that she would pee on everything I love. Considering our history, I'm going to start checking my things for urine. FML

#20522100
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26362) - you deserved it (2251)

On 02/25/2013 at 7:44pm - misc - by sniperkit (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was taking a stroll in our yard, when my mother decided it would be hilarious to run me down with her Segway. FML

#20498382
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24460) - you deserved it (3327)

On 02/08/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I made a new friend: the cricket the doctor pulled out of my ear canal. FML

#20479072
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33036) - you deserved it (3174)

On 01/26/2013 at 12:53am - animals - by Ear Invasion - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I saw my crush at the grocery store. He saw me and started walking towards me. I got so excited that I farted when he came near. FML

#20402614
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34185) - you deserved it (9200)

On 12/16/2012 at 7:58pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was in a public toilet, enduring an extremely awkward silence between myself and the person in the next stall. In my rush to get out of there, I managed to get my ass stuck in the toilet seat, and ended up being pulled out by the maintenance men. FML

#20177662
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17892) - you deserved it (7179)

On 11/25/2012 at 1:56am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my cat went into labor. This is surprising since 6 years ago, we paid to have her spayed. FML

#20174337
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25239) - you deserved it (1805)

On 11/22/2012 at 8:34pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, after finishing a test, I decided to draw to pass the time. My teacher looked at the drawing and gave me a referral to the principal for drawing an "anti-Semitic picture." I'd drawn Superman. FML

#20163905
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19796) - you deserved it (1579)

On 11/15/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by Superman (man) - United States (California)

Today, I delivered a pizza to a guy so high out of his mind that I had to let myself in and set it down on a table, because he'd forgotten how to walk, and was on the ground sobbing. FML

#20157750
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26924) - you deserved it (1942)

On 11/10/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by anon - United States (Washington)

Today, I had to buy a new vacuum cleaner. My previous one stopped working, because apparently, my boyfriend has been using it to suck up our puppy's shit from the floor. FML

#20155036
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22860) - you deserved it (2192)

On 11/08/2012 at 2:03pm - love - by 99Problemsandfml - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to buy a new vacuum cleaner. My previous one stopped working, because apparently, my boyfriend has been using it to suck up our puppy's shit from the floor. FML

#20155036
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22860) - you deserved it (2192)

On 11/08/2012 at 2:03pm - love - by 99Problemsandfml - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad looked at him and said, "Nice outfit, but it's a little late for Halloween." Before I could intervene, my boyfriend said that joke had been done to death, to which my dad retorted, "Yeah, so has your mum." Instant fistfight. FML

#20144826
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29348) - you deserved it (3006)

On 11/02/2012 at 7:50pm - love - by for fuck sake dad (woman) - Ireland (Limerick)

Today, while giving a speech at work, I started sneezing. After what seemed to be the last sneeze, I went on talking. Apparently it wasn't, and I blew out my eardrum. FML

#20141826
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22935) - you deserved it (1546)

On 10/31/2012 at 5:03pm - work - by SoSoRachel - United States (Illinois)

Today, at the age of 57, my dad got a unicorn tattooed on his shoulder. FML

#20120590
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23425) - you deserved it (3943) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/17/2012 at 1:18am - love - by Anonymous - France (Bretagne)

Today, I woke up after having a dream which included sex with a very hot guy. I realized it's about time I get laid, because the hot guy was Brock from Pokémon. FML

#20119984
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31288) - you deserved it (6240)

On 10/16/2012 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by L (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: