About tootsie68 : Hello there! Thank you for creepily stalking me. You may go along your way now...
tootsie68's FML badges
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
tootsie68's favorite FMLs
Today, my boyfriend told me that he'd never made a girl orgasm. I didn't think much of it until he decided to go down on me. Every time he got me close to orgasm, he'd stop and ask, "Are you about to come?" or "Does that feel good?" Now I can see why he's never made a girl orgasm. FML
by Anonymous / 04/02/2012 at 10:07pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/02/2012 at 1:01am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
by ohgod... / 04/01/2012 at 10:18pm / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/01/2012 at 9:53am / Australia (Western Australia) / Transportation
by no one / 03/29/2012 at 2:29pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, my professor called me out in the middle of a lecture to ask why I was bleeding. I then had to explain to him, in front of around one hundred of my fellow classmates, that my largest zit had burst. FML
by Jayne / 03/29/2012 at 12:45am / United States / Health
by anonymous / 03/22/2012 at 12:46am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
Today, I was on a date with a guy I've been crushing on. In the middle of the dinner, he said he had to go get something from his car. When I asked what it was, he smiled and said it was a surprise. I waited for my surprise for half an hour. Then I decided to pay the bill and go home and cry. FML
by kingpig / 02/02/2012 at 1:00pm / Sweden (Skane Lan) / Love
by jjs51 / 01/23/2012 at 5:36pm / United States / Transportation
by toothpaste / 01/19/2012 at 7:17am / Australia (New South Wales) / Transportation
by appropriatepolice / 01/16/2012 at 3:19am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, during swimming in PE, I kept noticing a stinging feeling on my scrotum. Every time I jumped into the water I would feel a sharp stab. After the full hour of hell, I went to the bathroom and looked in my new trunks. The designer had left their sewing needle in the crotch netting. FML
by CantPublish / 01/14/2012 at 10:07pm / United States / Health
Today, I found out why my room-mates and I have been ill for the past week. Apparently a rodent climbed into our water cooker and died. I have been drinking tea and eating noodles that have been tainted by a corpse all this time. FML
by hannaaaahr / 01/11/2012 at 3:08pm / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Health
by Anonymous / 01/10/2012 at 12:43pm / India / Kids
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got…