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tommyfox

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tommyfox
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 709
  • Number of comments : 125
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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tommyfox's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

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tommyfox's favorite FMLs

Today, it took me a full ten minutes to finish on the toilet. I was babysitting at the time, and it took the kids those ten minutes to destroy the kitchen and shave the cat. FML

#13840378
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23084) - you deserved it (6770)

On 11/14/2010 at 12:18pm - kids - by nicki - United States (Illinois)

Today, while I was at my boyfriend's house, I got my period. About an hour after I tell him I just got my period, he impatiently says "Is it over yet?" FML

#11977098
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36914) - you deserved it (5475)

On 07/19/2010 at 2:38am - intimacy - by MandMandM (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I finally got my first kiss. I was so excited, I pissed myself. FML

#11324047
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38603) - you deserved it (26474)

On 06/20/2010 at 1:12am - love - by PissyPants (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mom asked me to clean beneath my brother's bed for money. I found a rotten apple, a picture of my best friend, and a dead bird. I got $10. FML

#7420452
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24034) - you deserved it (3913)

On 01/18/2010 at 3:04pm - kids - by Brotherssuckkk - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend dumped me so he could sleep with my mom without feeling guilty. FML

#7304423
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27456) - you deserved it (2455)

On 01/12/2010 at 6:54pm - intimacy - by notasgood (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend and I were sitting downstairs with my mom. We heard the dog running around upstairs and called it down. It came running down the stairs. With a used condom in its mouth. The same condom my girlfriend and I lost two weeks ago. It put it directly in my mom's hands. FML

#6356025
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12921) - you deserved it (5463)

On 11/18/2009 at 4:35pm - intimacy - by Tucker (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was really, REALLY tired at work. I went to the restroom to take a little break, and must have dozed off, because I was awoken by my boss, knocking on the door of the stall. Apparently, I had been snoring. FML

#5661357
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9804) - you deserved it (26270)

On 10/05/2009 at 12:36pm - work - by sleepytime (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, during foreplay, I was trying to be sexy. But instead I fell off the bed, landed in the laundry basket, and was attacked by the dog. FML

#5163461
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13386) - you deserved it (3535)

On 09/10/2009 at 2:18am - intimacy - by Loveless (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my 6 year old daughter somehow learned about sex. She also had the open house at her school where she meets her new teachers. When the teacher asked where she came from, she said, "My daddy's happy sacks." FML

#4713882
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33845) - you deserved it (3867)

On 08/21/2009 at 5:28pm - intimacy - by Ben (man) - United States

Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend. We went inside the theatre and he saw a couple of his friends. Instead of saying hi and coming back to watch the movie with me, he ditched me for them. When I reminded him he was forgetting something, he grabbed the popcorn out of my hands and left. FML

#4603530
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50059) - you deserved it (5217)

On 08/17/2009 at 3:49pm - love - by ditched (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was going on a first date with a girl I really like. We were going to see the new Harry Potter movie, and she told me she was getting all dressed up. It was only after I picked her up I realized she meant that she was dressing nicely. I was dressed as Harry Potter. FML

#3866065
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25961) - you deserved it (58206)

On 07/18/2009 at 9:26pm - misc - by harrysolo (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to a pet store to adopt a dog. I got a medium sized lab, a dog crate, and a few toys, then put his crate in the back of my truck and the dog in his crate. On the way home I realized I forgot dog bowls and some dog food. I went back, and when I got back out to my truck, my dog was gone. My stereo too. FML

#3739737
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47179) - you deserved it (7508)

On 07/14/2009 at 4:55am - animals - by doggone (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my cousin and I found out that when a girl puts a flower in the right side of her hair, it means she's available. The bigger the flower, the more available she is. My eleven year old boy cousin told me to "cut down a palm tree and put it in my hair". FML

#2671287
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63048) - you deserved it (6435)

On 06/06/2009 at 8:38pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I woke up and went into the bathroom and noticed a dark mass in the toilet. Thinking someone took a dump and didn't flush, I approached the toilet ready to dispose of it. That's when I noticed its whiskers and ears. It was a rat, and it was alive. FML

#1763886
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52351) - you deserved it (2821)

On 05/08/2009 at 11:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I left the sliding glass door to our townhouse open because it was such a beautiful day. Our new puppy, whom we have been potty training, peed in the yard and I praised him relentlessly. He then walked inside the house, pooped on the carpet, and ran back outside. FML

#1590703
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38051) - you deserved it (5210)

On 05/03/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by lalibear (woman) - United States (Oregon)



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