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tjanes

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tjanes

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 2 January 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2061
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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tjanes's page activity

Visits<b>ProximityToDeath</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 2:47pm<b>horseh</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 9:56pm<b>Andrewski12</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 9:48am<b>TypicalDaniela</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 8:08pm<b>JuliaaNoelle</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 7:34pm<b>tartar18</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 12:21pm<b>Caraselle</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 8:33pm<b>justdance257</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 3:49pm<b>allie2590</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 1:46am<b>euphoricness</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 5:34pm<b>trbetit</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 9:24pm<b>djoudjou7598</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 11:01am<b>Pat_Tricksta</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 12:32am<b>Bola2nv</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 1:49pm<b>1sweetsin</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 3:13am<b>cerlia</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 2:59am<b>dejavudejavu</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 12:54am<b>jmarti1024</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 11:46pm

Fucked!<b>horseh</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 3:56am

tjanes's FML badges

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That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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tjanes's favorite FMLs

Today, while working at Home Depot, a customer tried to engage me in a conversation about which gardening tool would "hypothetically" be the best to kill his wife with. FML

#21132614
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43620) - you deserved it (3536)

On 05/06/2014 at 6:47pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, a bird got into the walls of my house through a hole. I located where it was by following the chirping and scratching sounds, and drilled a hole to get it out. I pulled out the drill, only to find the drill bit bloody. Suddenly, no more chirps. FML

#21131587
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50841) - you deserved it (17115)

On 05/05/2014 at 5:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, while I was making dinner, my husband argued that our new dog has intelligence issues, and we should give him away. I angrily defended the poor thing, and had almost won, until the dog walked over and licked the inside of the hot oven door. FML

#21126864
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44229) - you deserved it (5780)

On 04/30/2014 at 1:17am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, at my wedding, my husband stood up to give a speech. It started out beautiful, until he told everyone how he started to fall in love with me after I blew him on our first date. FML

#21118892
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54242) - you deserved it (13453)

On 04/21/2014 at 11:43am - intimacy - by Sue Ellen (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my guide dog sneezed so hard that it slammed its head on the floor and knocked itself out. I have to trust this dog with my life. FML

#21117679
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51837) - you deserved it (4536)

On 04/20/2014 at 12:03am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today, the clock in the study lounge was off, so I was half-an-hour late to class. I was too embarrassed to walk in late, so I sat for the next half-hour with my ear against the door trying to hear the lecture. People stopped to ask if there was something wrong with me. Yeah, probably. FML

#21096550
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35162) - you deserved it (10417)

On 03/25/2014 at 11:31pm - work - by SocialAnxietySucks (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my drunken self became a vaguely racist poet. I am now the author of a four-page poem entitled "Chocolate Men". FML

#21094789
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30405) - you deserved it (16232)

On 03/23/2014 at 11:40pm - misc - by chocochoco - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up, ate breakfast, and left my dorm room, only to see about half a dozen people and my roommate shuffling around in the hall. Their zombie outfits and limping were so realistic that I freaked out and ran back inside, screaming. They think it was the greatest prank ever. FML

#21093670
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39489) - you deserved it (10385)

On 03/22/2014 at 5:08pm - misc - by campus pussy (man) - United States (California)

Today, my 3-year-old son discovered his testicles. When I asked him what they were, he replied, "They're my balls! They make my winkie happy!" Now he won't quit singing it. FML

#21084464
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38032) - you deserved it (5528)

On 03/11/2014 at 11:34pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while having a sneak through my brother's browser, I found a bookmark for a Google Docs file. It was a short story involving him horrifically killing our entire family. It ended with the words: "And that is what happens when people don't respect the author's privacy." FML

#21073315
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25373) - you deserved it (55787)

On 02/27/2014 at 4:46pm - misc - by well SHIT (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, during class our teacher asked us, "Who is Uncle Sam?" A girl answered, "He's the guy who founded KFC, right?" I'm in an AP class and have to put up with these morons constantly. FML

#21071374
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42408) - you deserved it (4191)

On 02/25/2014 at 4:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out what a lightweight my girlfriend is. After having a couple of drinks, she began flirting, then grabbed my ass. She felt around a bit before freaking out and asking where my penis was. FML

#21067583
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49382) - you deserved it (5692)

On 02/21/2014 at 12:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz)

Today, I walked into my apartment and smelled something extremely repugnant. I asked my roommate what had happened and she said, "I didn't know how else to kill it!" She'd trapped a bat that was in our apartment, put it in the oven, and set it to 400 degrees. FML

#21067130
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49976) - you deserved it (4041)

On 02/20/2014 at 11:10pm - misc - by BakedBat (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I came home from a night out with the lads. My girlfriend refused to make love to me, saying my sperm were drunk and would raise hell in her uterus. FML

#21055858
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45248) - you deserved it (14735) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/09/2014 at 10:39pm - intimacy - by vegas-81 - France

Today, something ran across my foot while I was on the toilet. Hearing me scream, my husband ran in. We now have a new "pet" mouse named Jerry that I am not allowed to kill under threat of divorce. FML



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