tisiphone

Search for a member

tisiphone

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3878
  • Number of comments : 584
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 5 posted

About tisiphone : I was a soldier for years, and I currently work in telecommunications. I love riding motorcycles, marksmanship, playing video games, and embarrassing men at all of the above. >;) I don't flame, but I'm not afraid to tell it how it is. If you don't act like a complete idiot, I'll do my best to stick up for you.

Some of my very favorite FML posters for their reason, humor, and just plain being awesome are:
Perdix
Freeze
RedPillSucks
Monikabug
Cinn
PsychoMerk
capilot
catkat1988

tisiphone's page activity

Visits<b>sandormatyi</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 1:47pm<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 10:30pm<b>NYGiants1925</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 12:38am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 8:45am<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 3:21am<b>Bulbadragon</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 7:24am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 8:50pm<b>jv622rg</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 2:54am<b>jacob_coryell98</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 4:28am<b>Amateur_Dank</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 1:59am<b>jcates2685</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 5:00pm<b>onedreamluvme</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 10:25am<b>GroupWorkSucks</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 10:37am<b>DoomSkuller</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 1:20am<b>gbankston7</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 7:07pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 10:04pm<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 9:49pm<b>sleepwalker13</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 10:26pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 2:45pm

tisiphone's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

tisiphone's favorite FMLs

Today, my physics teacher accidentally lit me on fire. FML

by human torch / 03/18/2010 at 11:22am / United States / Health

Today, I woke up crying in the middle of a nightmare in which my boyfriend of 8 months shot me through the heart whilst laughing as I screamed 'I Love You'. After I told him about this, he took me into his arms as I cried, stroked my back and said, 'What kind of gun was it?' FML

by justlittleoldme / 03/12/2010 at 8:17am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Love

Today, while playing Star Wars: The Force Unleashed, my phone rang, and I instinctively tried to pick it up with the Force. I kept trying until it stopped ringing. FML

by analinguist / 02/20/2010 at 2:04pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Geek

Today, the pictures from last night's party were put on Facebook. The pictures that show me getting in a drunken fight with a girl and her putting my face through the wall. FML

by creamed / 02/20/2010 at 12:29pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to a dress up party. The theme was pirates and prostitutes. At the door I was handed a voucher that said: 'Thank you for dressing up. Collect your free drink at the bar.' I didn't dress up. FML

by notaprossie / 02/03/2010 at 3:42am / South Africa (Gauteng) / Miscellaneous

Today, I caught my boyfriend cheating so I broke up with him. As revenge he threw my PS3 and XBox out of the window when I wasn't in our house. I got those consoles out of the spare money my three jobs had brought in - the same three jobs I had to get because he refused to get a job of his own. FML

by GamerGirl / 01/30/2010 at 10:17am / United Kingdom (St. Helens) / Love

Today, after having been a vegetarian for 8 years because I'm opposed to cruelty to animals, I lost a bet and had to eat a whole cheeseburger. I loved it. FML

by Anonymous / 01/29/2010 at 2:25am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my college professor/employer failed to send in a letter I had been counting on for a scholarship application. He has also decided not to pay me for the last two months. I'm not going to make rent. Apparently this is the punishment you get for politely declining a date with a married man. FML

by nothotforteacher / 01/07/2010 at 2:13am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of Fight Club. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband of five years told me he's leaving me and will be gone when I return from Iraq. When I told him I love him and asked him not to go, he said he won't file divorce papers just yet, but he's moving out-of-state because "we need time apart." I've been gone for most of the year. FML

by everyonesdivorced / 10/02/2009 at 12:47pm / Iraq (Baghdad) / Love

Today, I took a cute girl out to an arcade date, and mercilessly dominated her in every game there, to the point she refused to talk to me afterwards. Gamer Pride: 1 - Getting Laid: 0. FML

by razgriz1 / 08/20/2009 at 1:45am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I was at my job as a flight attendant. A passenger on my plane stopped breathing and turned blue. As I cleared his airways and was busy strapping an oxygen mask to his face, the passenger behind him tried to hand me her trash. Apparently I'm a walking trash can, no matter what I'm doing. FML

by skygoddess / 07/28/2009 at 3:29am / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, my girlfriend of eight years explained to me that the Egyptian pyramids were built by aliens from Mars. I have a B.S. in Biology and an M.S. in Anthropology, and I am working on my Ph.D. She thinks I'm an irrational idiot for telling her she is wrong. FML

by published_anthropologist / 07/23/2009 at 2:13am / United States / Work

Today, I was driving and saw two hot girls on the sidewalk so I rolled down the window to whistle at them. However, I failed to notice that the car in front of me had stopped at a red light. I rear ended the car, the girls ran away laughing their asses off, and now I have to pay for the damage. FML

by embarrassed / 07/21/2009 at 12:14am / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation

Today, I called the police regarding people speeding down my street because I was worried for my young kids. On the way home from my daughters ballet class I got pulled over 2 houses away from my house and got a $150 speeding ticket. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2009 at 4:15pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation