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tinkrocks98's FML badges
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tinkrocks98's favorite FMLs
Today, fed up with my nerdy appearance, I got my hair shaved off, hoping for a Walter White kind of look. I didn't think it was too bad, but not even an hour later, I'd already been called a "fat Bruce Willis" and compared to a freshly circumcised penis. FML
by richard / 03/21/2014 at 12:10pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by madib33 / 01/11/2014 at 12:49am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I walked in on my daughter lighting candles around one of her friends, who'd fallen asleep while her other friends chanted something in a different language. They still won't tell me what they were doing. FML
by Anonymous / 12/22/2013 at 10:36am / United States / Kids
by Anonymous / 12/21/2013 at 2:13pm / Sweden / Kids
by confsused / 12/16/2013 at 12:49pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by lavenderpiss / 12/15/2013 at 9:04pm / Australia (South Australia) / Kids
Today, while waiting in the queue at a supermarket checkout, my three-year-old daughter yells out, "Mom! Mom! Is that a man or a lady in front?" Embarrassed, I reply, "Honey, can't you see that it's a... it's a... a..." FML
by [...] / 12/12/2013 at 9:28am / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Kids
Today, my boyfriend let me be the first one to read the novel he dropped out of college to write. Turns out it's titled "A Brief History of Ass" and is an incoherent ramble about every time we've had anal sex. FML
by Anonymous / 12/11/2013 at 7:51pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by MissDQ / 12/02/2013 at 8:47am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous
Today, concerned about my daughter's recent behavior, I looked through her web browser history. I found web searches for information on how to make a bomb to blow up a "horse". I'm not sure if she's illiterate, but either way it seems I need to get her some help. FML
by Anonymous / 12/01/2013 at 4:43pm / United States (Hawaii) / Kids
by MissDQ / 11/30/2013 at 4:07am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous
by I don't know, son / 11/15/2013 at 8:53pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
by snowwhite / 10/28/2013 at 12:51am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy
by clean / 09/16/2013 at 3:51am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids
Today, as I was getting my nails done at a salon, the owner pulled my head back against the chair in front of all the customers and began to tweeze my eyebrows. When I exclaimed that I didn't pay for that service, she replied, "I don't care. This needs done." FML
by BaMiTsAnYa / 09/15/2013 at 9:21pm / United States (Florida) / Transportation
- 1Today, I found out my parents have been slipping birth control pills into my morning orange juice… 2Today, I found out my husband has been catfishing my sixteen year-old brother for over a year. FML 3Today, I babysat a kid who was such a bratty little prick that I actually considered walking out on…
- Today, trying to flirt with a girl, I was trying to make it out as if I had a great sex life. I got… Today, I was in the middle of having sex with my girlfriend. I told her that I loved her. She asked… Today, I was talking dirty with someone on the phone, when at one point I said, "Oh yeah, you like…