About tifdunc : I live in America.
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tifdunc's favorite FMLs
Today, my daughter had ice cream while I was napping. She didn't want me to know so she put the bowl in the trashcan and put the spoon in the garbage disposal and turned it on, because she thought it would make the spoon disappear. FML
by cherbear1000 / 06/17/2013 at 12:33am / United States (Maryland) / Kids
Today, my grandson visited me, and asked if I had any pictures of myself from when I was a little girl. I happily looked for a few photos to give him, asking what had piqued his curiosity. He replied that he wanted some for a presentation he's doing on the Middle Ages. FML
by Anonymous / 03/22/2013 at 9:19pm / France (Lorraine) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was walking by the side of the interstate because my car broke down. A nice young man stopped and asked if I was tired of walking. I said yes, to which he replied, "Try jogging asshole" then laughed and drove off. It was raining balls. FML
by WetWalking / 03/21/2013 at 9:31am / United States (Texas) / Transportation
Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML
by sbutler / 07/14/2011 at 4:14pm / United States (Florida) / Work
by Anonymous / 06/29/2011 at 7:52pm / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy
by Fatty1970 / 05/22/2011 at 9:33pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
by omg / 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
by Anonymous / 01/11/2010 at 3:09am / United States (New York) / Kids
Today, my boyfriend asked me to marry him by handing me a ring and telling me, "Okay we're engaged now." I should have seen it coming when we started dating, I went to his house one night and as I was leaving he said, "Okay you're my girlfriend now." FML
by Anonymous / 09/22/2009 at 12:27am / United States (Oklahoma) / Love
by Pumpkin / 07/17/2009 at 10:00pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
by insideout / 05/10/2009 at 4:25pm / United States (Connecticut) / Intimacy
Today, I got a call from my child's preschool saying that "Mindy keeps saying she sits on her daddy's lap and plays with his peter." My daughter meant 'puter, as in computer. Now the school is worried my husband is a child molester. FML
by Gumfanatic302 / 05/06/2009 at 9:43pm / United States (Nevada) / Kids
Today, I was in an elevator with my brother and a woman. He signs to me that she has a 'damn fine ass'. I chuckle and then shake my head. He shrugs. A second later the woman signs to us, 'Rick, don't you remember me?' Turns out she helped teach my brother sign language when he was six. FML
by elevator-troubles / 03/18/2009 at 3:59am / Australia (Australian Capital Territory) / Miscellaneous
by Noname / 03/06/2009 at 2:04pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
- 1Today, I found out my parents have been slipping birth control pills into my morning orange juice… 2Today, I found out my husband has been catfishing my sixteen year-old brother for over a year. FML 3Today, I babysat a kid who was such a bratty little prick that I actually considered walking out on…