Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

thedeadmen

Offline (the 03/10/2015 at 12:33am) | Search for a member

thedeadmen

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 659
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About thedeadmen : Ask

thedeadmen's page activity

Visits<b>Tressa1982</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 10:33pm<b>TahoeFMler</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 3:42am<b>nikki10118</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 3:21pm<b>ezrajab</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 12:51am<b>KingZach</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 7:08am<b>salyhahaha</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 6:16pm<b>SunTzu2</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 12:19pm<b>boxers4lyfe</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 2:39pm<b>JulianaBlackburn</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 5:31pm<b>grtfuldeadlovr</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 8:50pm<b>charcharthunder</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 6:54pm<b>stacey2570</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 8:41pm<b>oJoy</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 2:21pm<b>emeraldisle</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 11:52am<b>OneGirlsLife</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 4:16pm<b>jubejube239</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 8:04pm<b>MajesticTololosh</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 8:08am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 12:56pm

thedeadmen's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of thedeadmen's badges

thedeadmen's favorite FMLs

Today, my mother, her fiancé, and I were having dinner together. My mother was joking that she wasn't sure she could hold him down, as he used to "get around." She turned to talk to the waiter and my future step-father looked me up and down and winked. FML

#18279508
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32535) - you deserved it (2189)

On 11/18/2011 at 6:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, a cute guy in a bar came up to me, and we started chatting. I'm a natural blonde, and he commented on how nice my hair was. He then followed this up with, "Does the carpet match the curtains?" FML

#17485415
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32202) - you deserved it (4628)

On 08/15/2011 at 11:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up to my mom washing the dishes completely naked. Sadly, I was more surprised by the fact she was doing the dishes than the fact that that she was strutting about in her birthday suit. FML

#17330120
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32080) - you deserved it (2692)

On 08/01/2011 at 8:55am - intimacy - by notsurprised (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found that the love of my life is 3.5 inches, fully erect. My cell phone is bigger than that. FML

#15749213
779 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67044) - you deserved it (14096)

On 04/12/2011 at 12:00am - intimacy - by Artic (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while at a party, a cute topless woman sat next to me to flirt with the guy on the other end of the couch. This is the closest I've been to a pair of boobs in 3 years. FML

#15036556
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32159) - you deserved it (6261)

On 02/19/2011 at 2:57am - intimacy - by Username - China

Today, I found out that my wife named our son after her ex boyfriend. FML

#13633122
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31402) - you deserved it (2501)

On 10/28/2010 at 11:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I decided to wear string panties. While in line at the mall, they became untied. I was wearing a skirt. FML

#12781216
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13562) - you deserved it (34297)

On 08/28/2010 at 12:54am - misc - by wearingshorts - United States (New York)

Today, I met a guy online, and I realized the cyber sex I had with him was better than the sex I get from my boyfriend. FML

#7873279
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7625) - you deserved it (27841)

On 02/04/2010 at 9:51am - intimacy - by erin - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend asked me "is it in yet?" FML

#7335788
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27079) - you deserved it (6321)

On 01/14/2010 at 9:06am - intimacy - by anun (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I rejected my wife for sex. She then started to masturbate next to me. I got an erection. She then rejected me for sex. FML

#6927698
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6625) - you deserved it (72432)

On 12/24/2009 at 8:10pm - intimacy - by paidback - United States

Today, I discovered that my bed has a flea infestation. I discovered it after sleeping naked in it for about an hour. FML

#6883824
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24802) - you deserved it (5381)

On 12/22/2009 at 1:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I told my boyfriend that since I lost my job I can't afford a Christmas present for him, or anyone. He said trying anal would be fine. FML

#6456555
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22409) - you deserved it (11511)

On 11/26/2009 at 12:31am - intimacy - by ehwat (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, it was my boyfriends birthday and I saw he was logged in on ooVoo. He sent me a request to video chat so I decided to take off all of my clothes to surprise him. Little did I know, his entire family was at his house and at the computer because he, "wanted to show them what a great girlfriend I am." FML

#4050970
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23616) - you deserved it (69853)

On 07/26/2009 at 9:05am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had my first kiss standing in front of my front door. It was really cute, the way you normally think about first kisses. When I got inside, I realized my mom had been watching out her second story bedroom window taking pictures. She put them on Facebook captioned 'My baby's first kiss!' FML

#3302714
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (91740) - you deserved it (6526)

On 06/28/2009 at 11:53am - misc - by steven (man) - Cayman Islands

Today, my husband and I were getting it on when we heard a little giggle. I put on my robe and looked outside my room to find that no one was there. So we continued. I later called my seven year old son and out he came crawling from under the bed. FML

#3127990
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47133) - you deserved it (10237)

On 06/22/2009 at 7:41pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: