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thecouchisalive

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thecouchisalive

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1218
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About thecouchisalive : I have no social life so I read FML's all day every day. Still haven't gotten one posted...

thecouchisalive's page activity

Visits<b>lhuss12</b> - 3 hours ago<b>stuckintime</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 10:38pm<b>kansah</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 7:03am<b>darthgagemo</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 3:58am<b>FloWPs</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 3:24pm<b>chloesma</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 10:28pm<b>Hash13</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 8:42am<b>royr7395</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 1:30am<b>gis0392</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 11:20pm<b>zBerryz</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 11:25pm<b>juststephhere</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 11:41pm<b>tazmanmike2013</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 1:26am<b>colton_colton</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 3:27pm<b>samanthagood</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 11:52pm<b>kmarshofmywindow</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 12:58pm<b>jaydoug92</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 11:46pm<b>GEORGETOWN_22</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 2:47pm<b>powerkeep</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 10:40am

Fucked!<b>gshocker20</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 6:48pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 1:03pm<b>lhuss12</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 10:42pm

thecouchisalive's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of thecouchisalive's badges

thecouchisalive's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my class to name some West African countries. Several of them thought Ebola was a country. I teach an AP history class. FML

#21400396
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19924) - you deserved it (2005)

On 04/27/2015 at 12:58am - work - by advanced history teacher (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, a friendly game of Cards Against Humanity somehow ended in a screaming match, my best friend's mother pulling out her tits, and me getting bit in the foot by a dog. FML

Today, my 13-year-old sister told me that she wants to get pregnant soon to stop her periods for a while. I can't believe we're related. FML

#21393492
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30861) - you deserved it (2405)

On 04/14/2015 at 11:49am - health - by TheGoodSister - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my husband and I caught our 12-year-old son "experimenting" with a 5-foot tall stuffed Mickey Mouse. He even made sure to rip Mickey's pants off. FML

#21392745
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28471) - you deserved it (3008)

On 04/13/2015 at 1:35am - intimacy - by bigmouthedmommy - United States (California)

Today, a little girl from my Sunday School class approached me and told me she had a stomach ache. She seemed very upset and her face was discolored so I took her to the nurse. While we were walking out the door, I looked down and saw a half-eaten crayon on the floor. That'll do it. FML

#21392424
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24004) - you deserved it (1876)

On 04/12/2015 at 3:49pm - health - by drewcaver - United States (Texas)

Today, for the first time in my life, a girl showed interest in me. She sent me a text message saying she wanted to come over and fuck my brains out. This would've made me the happiest guy alive, if only she weren't my extremely drunk sister. FML

#21391907
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32402) - you deserved it (2595)

On 04/11/2015 at 4:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I got grounded because my mom found a condom in the bathroom trashcan and assumed it was mine. I took the blame because I was too embarrassed to admit that it must have belonged to my 13-year-old brother, since I'm still a virgin at 19. FML

#21391452
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30165) - you deserved it (4646)

On 04/10/2015 at 7:16pm - misc - by uglybrother (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out just how much my dog likes ice-cream when she tackled a little girl at a park for hers. FML

Today, I saw one one of my cat's hairs on my sweatpants and wanted to remove it. It wasn't a cat hair, but a pubic hair that has found its way through my panties and sweatpants while being still attached to me. FML

Today, I found my first bra and tried it on. It still fits. FML

#21388113
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31292) - you deserved it (3277)

On 04/05/2015 at 3:18pm - misc - by Itsbeen8years (woman) - Slovakia (Bratislava)

Today, at the DMV I was told I had to prove, with a doctor's note, that I was an amputee and my disability was permanent to get my placard. Apparently, setting my prosthetic leg on the counter wasn't proof enough, and is considered "threatening". The police were called. FML

#21386342
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38243) - you deserved it (2085)

On 04/02/2015 at 2:43am - health - by usadisvet (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I woke up this morning in a panic. Last night, I heard scratching at my door, but I thought it was just my cat and went back to sleep. This morning, it hit me that my cat is 600 miles away living with my mom in Iowa. I'm terrified to even sleep now. FML

#21370427
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61) - you deserved it (2564)

On 03/08/2015 at 10:41am - animals - by no salt, no burning, just STFU (man) - United States

Today, at a music festival, some douche unzipped the back of my skirt, exposing my Ninja Turtle undies to everyone before running off. FML

#21369215
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30881) - you deserved it (4507)

On 03/06/2015 at 9:03am - misc - by no touching - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my mother walked in on me watching porn. As punishment, she sat down and made me watch the rest of it with her as she gave play-by-play commentary. FML

#21368964
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43237) - you deserved it (19577)

On 03/05/2015 at 10:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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