theboringdolphin

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Offline (the 08/05/2015 at 1:57am)

theboringdolphin

8Fucked!

theboringdolphintheboringdolphin
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 30 August 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5225
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About theboringdolphin : hi everyone(: I love people with an awesome sense of humor, I love to read & listen to music. I'm into Anime and I'm in a couple of fandoms. I'm not sure what else to say about myself but if you wanna know more feel free to leave a message!

theboringdolphin's page activity

Visits<b>dantee2005</b> - the 09/05/2015 at 11:50pm<b>hussamhasi</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 5:47pm<b>ricardof</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 4:41pm<b>Relf</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 1:07am<b>rydin10</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 11:52pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 7:40pm<b>Yazoo77</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 6:58pm<b>Fgjvshnb</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 8:06am<b>crudeandrudeguy</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 12:25am<b>ahmadmuneer</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 12:53am<b>MRITCHEZ</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 4:17am<b>marshm610</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 4:43pm<b>ausmoss123</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 2:18am<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 12:07am<b>elusiveshame</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 6:10am<b>jjumprope</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 11:42am<b>SimplyCyrax</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 11:19pm<b>Nagi</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 7:02pm

Fucked!<b>marshm610</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 10:43pm<b>elusiveshame</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 12:20am<b>jjumprope</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 5:42pm<b>eliiteXXXninja</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 11:55pm<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 7:39pm<b>1Nsan3</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 7:16am<b>S232Flash</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 11:05am

theboringdolphin's FML badges

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You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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theboringdolphin's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time in over a month. When I came, I thrust one last time and let out a huge fart. She couldn't keep her mouth shut about it, and now all our friends keep calling me "CumFart". FML

by I'll Make You FartCum / 01/02/2015 at 4:53pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up at 4am needing a piss, only to walk in on my fuckstick brother combing his pubes with our mom's toothbrush. FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2015 at 11:20am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I woke up after a night of New Year's Eve partying. I remember the night going great. What I don't remember is laying naked in the shower while my girlfriend ran water over my body to make me feel better. I also made my own funeral plans because I was convinced I was going to die. FML

by CK95 / 01/01/2015 at 6:02pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, is the fourth day of my husband's and my new diet and exercise routine. I've already caught him eating junk food 4 times. He has lost 2 lbs and I've gained 3. FML

by hungry / 01/01/2015 at 12:50am / United States / Health

Today, I could not decide what was sadder: the fact that I have to work on New Year's Eve, or that fact that working on New Year's Eve is still the most exciting thing I've ever done for New Year's Eve. FML

by MegaZeo / 12/31/2014 at 7:29pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I found out my 7-year-old daughter really did lie about my husband's "other girlfriend" as revenge for being grounded, and that he never cheated on me at all. We're well into our divorce proceedings and he won't forgive me for not believing him when he denied it. FML

by skanula414 / 12/31/2014 at 2:00pm / Sweden (Skane Lan) / Kids

Today, my elderly neighbour told me why my other neighbours don't talk to me. I'm a massage/physical therapist and treat clients, mostly athletes, in my home. My neighbours saw the steady stream of young, buff guys coming to my house and concluded that I'm a gay prostitute. FML

by Anonymous / 12/30/2014 at 10:34pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, I slept on the plane ride home and had a scary nightmare. I started screaming in my dream, so loud that it shocked the old lady sitting next to me into screaming as well. The whole plane began laughing as we were both screaming. FML

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Things got heated and I yelled, "Who's your daddy?" With a blank expression she replied, "I don't know." FML

by Anonymous / 12/28/2014 at 9:49pm / United States (Delaware) / Intimacy

Today, I texted my girlfriend, saying "Hey there." She quickly replied, assuring me that she's not cheating on me. Uh, okay. FML

by is_that_right / 12/27/2014 at 2:14pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my boyfriend sent me a screenshot of his phone's contact list, to show me the adorable photo of us he'd set as my contact image. I guess he didn't realize that a contact called "Side Babe" was just barely in the screenshot too. FML

by Anonymous / 12/27/2014 at 11:54am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I was trying to show my family a cool website. Unfortunately my porn instincts kicked in and I started typing the URL of my favorite porn site. I couldn't stop myself before it autocompleted. FML

by Anonymous / 12/26/2014 at 5:38pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to break up with my psychotic bitch of a girlfriend after months of abuse. When she opened the door, her 5-year-old son ran up to me, smiling and calling me "DADDY!" for the first time. Now I don't have the heart to dump the psycho and devastate her son. FML

by Anonymous / 12/26/2014 at 12:36pm / United States (Minnesota) / Love

Today, I found a hornet's nest in the backyard, so I called my brother over to take a look. He said "Hmm, wonder how fast you can run." then hurled a rock at the nest and sprinted back to the house. I wasn't so fast. I now feel like someone's beaten me half to death with a cactus. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2014 at 9:43am / United States (Virginia) / Health