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theboringdolphin

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theboringdolphin
  • Town/Country : New Jersey, United states
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 30 August 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 826
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About theboringdolphin : hi everyone(: I love people with an awesome sense of humor, I love to read & listen to music, and I love to watch anime haha ok bye! (:

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

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theboringdolphin's favorite FMLs

Today, my brother tried to pay me to teach him how to French-kiss, so he wouldn't screw up on his first date. I'm shocked that the weirdo managed to get a date in the first place. FML

#21094457
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37478) - you deserved it (3506)

On 03/23/2014 at 4:25pm - love - by doesn't fuck on the first, thank god (woman) - United Kingdom (Southend-on-Sea)

Today, I learned that most teenagers would rather grab free candy from the broken vending machine than help the guy stuck underneath it get free. FML

#21093947
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39781) - you deserved it (4500)

On 03/23/2014 at 12:05am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up, ate breakfast, and left my dorm room, only to see about half a dozen people and my roommate shuffling around in the hall. Their zombie outfits and limping were so realistic that I freaked out and ran back inside, screaming. They think it was the greatest prank ever. FML

#21093670
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36879) - you deserved it (9374)

On 03/22/2014 at 5:08pm - misc - by campus pussy (man) - United States (California)

Today, at a family gathering, it emerged that my now ex-fiancé has been sleeping with his brother's girlfriend for some time now. A fight broke out, the police were called, and more than one of his relatives are blaming me for him cheating with her. FML

#21093499
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36011) - you deserved it (2872)

On 03/22/2014 at 1:31pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, once again I was told I looked a bit like Lindsay Lohan. I can't figure out if they mean the young, good looking one, or the current cracked out rehab version. FML

#21093234
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35320) - you deserved it (3648)

On 03/22/2014 at 3:18am - misc - by Jen__ - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got to spend 4 hours on a bus with a group of selfie-taking teenagers who spent the majority of the time trying to harmonize while singing various songs. I'm pretty sure half of them were tone deaf. FML

#21092926
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34927) - you deserved it (3314)

On 03/21/2014 at 7:59pm - misc - by please stop singing!!!! - United States (Florida)

Today, my mother took me to go and see my grandfather, who I hadn't seen since I was 4. The first thing he said to me was, "Pfwoarr, look at those tits." FML

#21085518
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45102) - you deserved it (4119)

On 03/13/2014 at 5:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I started my first job as a power line technician. My boss's first words to me were, "I have a good feeling about you, kid!" That would've been great if he hadn't said, "Although, the last time I had a good feeling, the guy died." right afterwards. FML

#21085148
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38995) - you deserved it (2920)

On 03/12/2014 at 8:11pm - work - by Anon - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I met my mom's new business partner for the first time. I shook his hand, and introduced myself as "Lisa's daughter". I'm a guy. FML

#21085066
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33083) - you deserved it (10836)

On 03/12/2014 at 6:23pm - work - by CurtisWogan (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was so tired that I fell asleep on a bus. When I awoke suddenly, half of the bus was staring at me, with some people chuckling and smiling. I have no idea what I did. FML

#21084790
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40994) - you deserved it (4694)

On 03/12/2014 at 11:33am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my 3-year-old son discovered his testicles. When I asked him what they were, he replied, "They're my balls! They make my winkie happy!" Now he won't quit singing it. FML

#21084464
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36264) - you deserved it (5260)

On 03/11/2014 at 11:34pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

#21083446
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44396) - you deserved it (6059)

On 03/10/2014 at 8:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I had to bail my brother out of jail because he started a fight with a guy who didn't like owls. FML

#21082949
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41892) - you deserved it (3696)

On 03/10/2014 at 4:22am - misc - by are you kidding me? - United Kingdom (Ealing)

Today, my mother decided to tell me about how my twin brother almost killed me in the womb when his cord wrapped around my neck. When she left the room, he said, "You won't be so lucky next time." FML

#21081555
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40970) - you deserved it (3836)

On 03/08/2014 at 6:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went on a date with a girl my friend set me up with. I thought we got along great, until after dessert, when I asked if she'd be interested in doing this again. She just said, "Nahhh" then got up and casually left, stiffing me on the bill. FML

#21074975
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41049) - you deserved it (4333)

On 03/01/2014 at 1:46pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)



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