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thebigslim

Offline (the 05/24/2015 at 7:03pm) | Search for a member

thebigslim

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 17 July 1979 (35 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 14403
  • Number of comments : 102
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About thebigslim : Smartass by nature..... and is it just me, or is it next to impossible to get your own FML published on here?

thebigslim's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 4:54pm<b>Chrissyella</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 7:29pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 3:09pm<b>alecfreddie</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 6:55pm<b>horsehaed7</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 3:35pm<b>calvo_07</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 1:10am<b>ForeverAlone247</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 12:13am<b>dylanger16</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 3:43pm<b>MrAwesomenezz</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 3:08pm<b>lndala</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 1:32pm<b>HialedMovie</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 1:13pm<b>noik01</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 10:56am<b>moonchic</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 9:49am<b>CFB_FRS</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 8:02am<b>BigJoeZD</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 7:59am<b>AnnaDeWitt</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 3:46am<b>leaswaim</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 3:43am<b>3051628</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 3:12am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 10:54pm<b>calvo_07</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 7:10am<b>dylanger16</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 9:43pm<b>Shrekie</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 6:50am<b>chefcow</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 8:31am

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thebigslim's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized how out of shape I am, when I couldn't finish masturbating because I ran out of breath. FML

#14954867
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15439) - you deserved it (59044)

On 02/13/2011 at 4:01am - intimacy - by RyanM - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I noticed that after a month of using my gel, it never seems to empty. I then found out my older brother and his friends had been pumping their man-juice into it. FML

#14838014
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68513) - you deserved it (6291)

On 02/04/2011 at 9:08am - intimacy - by theish -

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70166) - you deserved it (6588)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I accidentally drank my sister's science project. Her science project consisted of taking a glass of orange juice and putting maggots in it to see if they would live. I thought it was just pulp. FML

#14820384
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38677) - you deserved it (22607)

On 02/02/2011 at 11:46pm - misc - by Username -

Today, while my boyfriend was inside me, he got a text message. He actually stopped thrusting to reply. FML

#14808267
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34619) - you deserved it (5516)

On 02/02/2011 at 4:48am - intimacy - by fml -

Today, while in my room sleeping, my little brother deemed it necessary to come in and drop a book on my face. When I sat up with a now bloody nose, he looked at me, pointed, and said "You've just been facebooked" and ran away giggling. FML

#14806356
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43539) - you deserved it (7957)

On 02/02/2011 at 12:57am - kids - by Malakai - United States

Today, I was startled awake at 4am by a loud and awful sound. Completely serious, I asked my fiancé if he had just shit his pants. His response: giggles followed by a softly whispered "maybe". FML

#14794923
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36516) - you deserved it (4819)

On 02/01/2011 at 8:43am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I decided to wake my fiancé up by giving him a blow-job. When he finally started to wake up he called me by his ex's name. FML

#14791115
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39469) - you deserved it (5711)

On 01/31/2011 at 7:33pm - intimacy - by MollyMadamme -

Today, I broke my arm. When I got home from the doctors with my cast, I fell asleep on the couch from the medicine. When I woke up, there were swastikas, "I love the KKK", and multiple penises written all over my cast. My dad thought it would be funny. FML

#14750549
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32671) - you deserved it (3950)

On 01/28/2011 at 11:10pm - health - by Mervin22 - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my girlfriend, who's on a diet, refused to give me a blow job because my sperm would "add useless calories" to her day. FML

#14677100
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36743) - you deserved it (13449)

On 01/22/2011 at 7:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my girlfriend was going down on me, when I heard my dog start growling. He must have thought my girlfriend was hurting me, because out of nowhere and before I could do anything, he attacked her. FML

#14675565
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32235) - you deserved it (5301)

On 01/22/2011 at 4:24pm - intimacy - by ohsnap (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I sneaked into my girlfriend's house for some romantic time. Before going into her room, I took a dump in the bathroom. Once I was done, I not only noticed that there was no toilet paper left, but I heard her and her 6'5, heavyweight boxer, ex-marine father, talking outside the bathroom door. FML

#14673565
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10533) - you deserved it (44353)

On 01/22/2011 at 12:39pm - love - by jester777 (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my dentist pulled a pubic hair out of my braces. FML

#14672798
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18397) - you deserved it (50943)

On 01/22/2011 at 11:04am - intimacy - by mortified (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, while skiing, I really needed to pee. The instructor pointed me towards some bushes. I slid over to them, and pulled my panties down. My skis then started sliding back down the slope. I ended up gliding through the bushes, all the way down to the rest of the group. FML

#14670797
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29234) - you deserved it (7655) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/22/2011 at 3:49am - misc - by sandra22 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I braved the winter weather conditions to get to a clinic for a prescription anti-diarrhea medication. When I arrived to find it closed, I turned around to walk to my car where I slipped on the ice. The impact made me simultaneously bruise my elbow and shit myself. FML

#14660867
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34266) - you deserved it (3356)

On 01/21/2011 at 10:13am - health - by chelseaface (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



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