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thebigslim

Offline (the 01/24/2015 at 5:36am) | Search for a member

thebigslim

4Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 17 July 1979 (35 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 14013
  • Number of comments : 102
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About thebigslim : Smartass by nature..... and is it just me, or is it next to impossible to get your own FML published on here?

thebigslim's page activity

Visits<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 3:09pm<b>alecfreddie</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 6:55pm<b>horsehaed7</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 3:35pm<b>calvo_07</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 1:10am<b>ForeverAlone247</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 12:13am<b>dylanger16</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 3:43pm<b>MrAwesomenezz</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 3:08pm<b>lndala</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 1:32pm<b>HialedMovie</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 1:13pm<b>noik01</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 10:56am<b>moonchic</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 9:49am<b>CFB_FRS</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 8:02am<b>BigJoeZD</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 7:59am<b>AnnaDeWitt</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 3:46am<b>leaswaim</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 3:43am<b>3051628</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 3:12am<b>cole_tyler42</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 1:33am<b>thepurplewalrus</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 12:56am

Liked!<b>calvo_07</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 7:10am<b>dylanger16</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 9:43pm<b>Shrekie</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 6:50am<b>chefcow</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 8:31am

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thebigslim's favorite FMLs

Today, I accidentally drank my sister's science project. Her science project consisted of taking a glass of orange juice and putting maggots in it to see if they would live. I thought it was just pulp. FML

#14820384
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38622) - you deserved it (22587)

On 02/02/2011 at 11:46pm - misc - by Username -

Today, while my boyfriend was inside me, he got a text message. He actually stopped thrusting to reply. FML

#14808267
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34558) - you deserved it (5514)

On 02/02/2011 at 4:48am - intimacy - by fml -

Today, while in my room sleeping, my little brother deemed it necessary to come in and drop a book on my face. When I sat up with a now bloody nose, he looked at me, pointed, and said "You've just been facebooked" and ran away giggling. FML

#14806356
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43484) - you deserved it (7947)

On 02/02/2011 at 12:57am - kids - by Malakai - United States

Today, I was startled awake at 4am by a loud and awful sound. Completely serious, I asked my fiancé if he had just shit his pants. His response: giggles followed by a softly whispered "maybe". FML

#14794923
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36471) - you deserved it (4814)

On 02/01/2011 at 8:43am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I decided to wake my fiancé up by giving him a blow-job. When he finally started to wake up he called me by his ex's name. FML

#14791115
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39411) - you deserved it (5706)

On 01/31/2011 at 7:33pm - intimacy - by MollyMadamme -

Today, I broke my arm. When I got home from the doctors with my cast, I fell asleep on the couch from the medicine. When I woke up, there were swastikas, "I love the KKK", and multiple penises written all over my cast. My dad thought it would be funny. FML

#14750549
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32607) - you deserved it (3948)

On 01/28/2011 at 11:10pm - health - by Mervin22 - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my girlfriend, who's on a diet, refused to give me a blow job because my sperm would "add useless calories" to her day. FML

#14677100
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36684) - you deserved it (13432)

On 01/22/2011 at 7:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my girlfriend was going down on me, when I heard my dog start growling. He must have thought my girlfriend was hurting me, because out of nowhere and before I could do anything, he attacked her. FML

#14675565
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30157) - you deserved it (5082)

On 01/22/2011 at 4:24pm - intimacy - by ohsnap (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I sneaked into my girlfriend's house for some romantic time. Before going into her room, I took a dump in the bathroom. Once I was done, I not only noticed that there was no toilet paper left, but I heard her and her 6'5, heavyweight boxer, ex-marine father, talking outside the bathroom door. FML

#14673565
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10513) - you deserved it (44305)

On 01/22/2011 at 12:39pm - love - by jester777 (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my dentist pulled a pubic hair out of my braces. FML

#14672798
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18366) - you deserved it (50914)

On 01/22/2011 at 11:04am - intimacy - by mortified (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, while skiing, I really needed to pee. The instructor pointed me towards some bushes. I slid over to them, and pulled my panties down. My skis then started sliding back down the slope. I ended up gliding through the bushes, all the way down to the rest of the group. FML

#14670797
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29185) - you deserved it (7648) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/22/2011 at 3:49am - misc - by sandra22 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I braved the winter weather conditions to get to a clinic for a prescription anti-diarrhea medication. When I arrived to find it closed, I turned around to walk to my car where I slipped on the ice. The impact made me simultaneously bruise my elbow and shit myself. FML

#14660867
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32639) - you deserved it (3212)

On 01/21/2011 at 10:13am - health - by chelseaface (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was chosen by my coworkers to explain to my elderly boss that ''tossing the salad'' isn't another expression for saying ''brainstorming''. She didn't believe me. Guess we will all keep ''tossing the salad'' for new ideas each afternoon. FML

#14646268
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21877) - you deserved it (2827)

On 01/20/2011 at 1:01am - intimacy - by welly223 (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was at the grocery store with my dad. He let out a very silent but foul abomination of a fart. The people behind us started gagging, so he turned, pointed at me and said "That was my daughter." FML

#14622916
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31739) - you deserved it (3383)

On 01/18/2011 at 3:28am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had an asthma attack because I was masturbating too vigorously. FML

#14614726
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17546) - you deserved it (43181) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins



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