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thebigslim

Offline (the 01/29/2016 at 7:18pm) | Search for a member

thebigslim

7Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 17 July 1979 (36 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 15428
  • Number of comments : 104
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About thebigslim : Smartass by nature..... and is it just me, or is it next to impossible to get your own FML published on here?

thebigslim's page activity

Visits<b>celebi82</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 5:58pm<b>grunt2423</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 10:20pm<b>wobbly1</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 2:23pm<b>Winterborn253</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 2:16pm<b>maddod26</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 12:21pm<b>Justin1459</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 12:06am<b>Marmarfarfar</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 4:12pm<b>marvelvsdc</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 12:05am<b>Laeffy</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 2:30pm<b>ben57rocks</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 8:20pm<b>glossykarma</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 11:00pm<b>nuka_cola</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 5:34pm<b>XxeftxX</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 5:01pm<b>skylercoombs</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 9:40pm<b>caaguilar</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 8:05pm<b>deathcreep25</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 9:23pm<b>Airshock22</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 7:51am<b>nothemother</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 10:42am

Fucked!<b>Marmarfarfar</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 10:12pm<b>caaguilar</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 2:05am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 10:54pm<b>calvo_07</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 7:10am<b>dylanger16</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 9:43pm<b>Shrekie</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 6:50am<b>chefcow</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 8:31am

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thebigslim's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that fist pumping during sex is not romantic. FML

#16525505
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42020) - you deserved it (6510)

On 06/06/2011 at 3:44am - intimacy - by ... - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I got pulled over for going about 88mph. When the cop asked why I was speeding, I replied, "I was trying to go back in time". He didn't like that answer and gave me a ticket. FML

#16248002
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12795) - you deserved it (67873)

On 05/19/2011 at 1:30am - work - by 613tanner -

Today, I was at Walmart with my mom, when a guy next to me let out a series of vicious farts. Assuming it was me, my mom chewed me out in front of the guy and made me apologize. The man looked at my mom and said, "Children, they're so immature." FML

#16237035
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45058) - you deserved it (3732)

On 05/18/2011 at 12:08pm - misc - by nicknick2 (woman) - United States (Delaware)

Today, I got a boner in the MRI machine while my pelvic bone was being scanned. FML

#16218945
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50023) - you deserved it (8041)

On 05/17/2011 at 6:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, I went bowling with some friends. After a few beers I was showing off spinning the ball around on the tip of my finger. One trip to the ER and two crushed nuts later, I've found that mixing alcohol and heavy shiny balls is not a good idea. FML

#16216813
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10717) - you deserved it (49911)

On 05/17/2011 at 12:28am - intimacy - by paulwatson93 (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, while tanning on a family cruise, I woke up to a crowd of people staring at me in disgust. Apparently, I'd fallen asleep, developed a boner, and started french-kissing the air. I had to sit through both the surveillance tapes and a grand bollocking from security in the aftermath. FML

#16161351
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41530) - you deserved it (10471)

On 05/13/2011 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by f*cks_sake - United States (Ohio)

Today, my phone alarm woke me up. It had fallen under my boyfriend's bed. Naked, I got on all fours to retrieve it. My boyfriend's dog stuck his nose in my ass. FML

#16101317
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45389) - you deserved it (18462)

On 05/09/2011 at 2:08am - intimacy - by coldwetnose (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend kindly let me know that she didn't care that I am 'below average' in the penis department because it will leave her nice and tight for her next boyfriend. FML

#15948281
343 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70416) - you deserved it (7816)

On 04/27/2011 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I promised my boyfriend a blow job every time he does the dishes. Every dish in the house has been washed three times already. FML

#15718627
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21382) - you deserved it (70249)

On 04/10/2011 at 1:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, while making my son lunch, he pooped, took off his diaper, stepped in it, and then climbed to the gate to call for me. When I arrived, he had a big smile on his face and exclaimed, "Look!" Shit footprints were everywhere. FML

Today, my girlfriend hid my car keys and decided that she wouldn't give them back until I succeeded in giving her an orgasm. FML

#15689615
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19682) - you deserved it (78724)

On 04/08/2011 at 1:24am - intimacy - by failure -

Today, I was at the mall with my friends, when a creepy man sat at the table next to us, and started rubbing his crotch, his gaze never leaving my feet. FML

#15482559
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40196) - you deserved it (4068)

On 03/25/2011 at 1:31pm - intimacy - by ewww - United States

Today, at work, a coworker started to tell me about his weekend, without me even asking. Halfway through his story, I started to daydream and lost track of time. Bored, I told him, "Hey man, I'll call you back, I've got to get back to work." Then I remembered I wasn't on the phone. FML

#15441546
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12692) - you deserved it (44836)

On 03/22/2011 at 11:46pm - work - by PFCdavila (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my friend convinced me that a staple gun doesn't work on skin. I decided to put this new piece of information to the test. FML

#15239631
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9071) - you deserved it (96280)

On 03/08/2011 at 10:50am - misc - by ouch (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I discovered that sea-sickness also applies when making love on my girlfriend's new water bed. FML

#15226088
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42692) - you deserved it (5888)

On 03/07/2011 at 2:28am - intimacy - by dizzy (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)



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