Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

thatotk

Offline (yesterday at 9:23pm) | Search for a member

thatotk

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 29 December 1992 (23 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 11463
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About thatotk : You better not pout. You better not cry. You better not shout, I'm telling you why. If you make a sound, you.. will die.

thatotk's page activity

Visits<b>lulumars</b> - yesterday at 9:14pm<b>Sudoc</b> - yesterday at 4:46pm<b>chrisjw27</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 11:50am<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 2:25pm<b>JuzReading</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 5:35am<b>lirideout</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 3:28am<b>RandEm2497</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 1:48am<b>annarcheer</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 8:59am<b>Space_Teddy</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 6:41pm<b>jen1682</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 3:20pm<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 10:00pm<b>its_bree</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 5:19am<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 6:37pm<b>stickingems</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 10:35pm<b>neomimaylee</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 1:10am<b>omfgorlaith</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 6:15pm<b>seth7_</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 3:42pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 10:47pm

Fucked!<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 4:05pm

thatotk's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of thatotk's badges

thatotk's favorite FMLs

Today, while relaxing in the kitchen drinking coffee, my dad suddenly rushed in, knocking me over and causing me to spill boiling hot coffee all over myself. Then, my dad thought it would be a good idea to grab the sprayer from the sink and douse me with cold water in order to "put me out." FML

#15805377
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30817) - you deserved it (3783)

On 04/16/2011 at 8:46am - misc - by inalotofpain (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after receiving the third call this week from teachers about my son falling asleep in class, I decided that it would be a good idea to hide his Xbox controllers. He decided it would be a good idea to hide my diabetes medication. FML

#15805325
389 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49243) - you deserved it (18713)

On 04/16/2011 at 8:35am - health - by bbedlock (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob for the first time. This is the moment he chooses to exclaim, "Wow, you really do have a lot of dandruff!" FML

#15805096
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44073) - you deserved it (12231) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/16/2011 at 7:28am - intimacy - by Proprepourtant - France

Today, my wife and I were planning our nursery for our future child. She said that we'd be painting it pink either way. I asked what would happen if we had a boy. She said "Oh, he'll be gay" with a menacing glare. I'm worried. FML

#15804993
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42961) - you deserved it (6866)

On 04/16/2011 at 6:59am - misc - by Worried (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I ran a red light in front of a cop and got pulled over. My friend thought it would be funny to throw a knife in my lap and scream "Help me officer, he has a knife!" FML

#15773415
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48707) - you deserved it (7328)

On 04/13/2011 at 6:57pm - misc - by FrOsTy25 -

Today, I freaked out when the remote wouldn't unlock my car. I stood in the rain trying to open the door. Unsure of what to do next, I called my boyfriend. He told me to "put the key in the door". I had forgotten about that option. FML

#15772637
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9765) - you deserved it (65760)

On 04/13/2011 at 5:44pm - misc - by andimanastudent (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went on a date for the first time in eight months. He didn't make a move. I then asked if we were on a date. He said, "I don't know, I guess." I can't tell either. FML

#15705235
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31025) - you deserved it (5446)

On 04/09/2011 at 4:08am - love - by confused (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was having some intense sex with my boyfriend. I was wailing so loud that my neighbors decided to call the police on us. According to them, it sounded like I was "being tortured to death". FML

#15698653
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20134) - you deserved it (36770)

On 04/08/2011 at 7:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my husband told me that he can't find his passport. We're supposed to be leaving for Prague in two days. He's known about the trip for months. It was the anniversary vacation that was going to help our frayed relationship. Now my money is going to a hotel in Prague, but I'm not. FML

#15691728
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29928) - you deserved it (4116)

On 04/08/2011 at 7:07am - misc - by stuckhome (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend's parents visited us. When everyone was chatting in the room, I needed to go to the bathroom. I got up and wanted to walk away when I sneezed, and farted at the same time. I thought they didn't hear it, until my boyfriend's brother said: "That wasn't just a sneeze was it?" FML

#15662595
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34192) - you deserved it (5266)

On 04/06/2011 at 7:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML

#15619603
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78369) - you deserved it (6255)

On 04/03/2011 at 11:14am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was in the shower 'grooming' myself for my second anniversary with my boyfriend. Halfway through the hot water ran out. I now have the choice of going with the low 'half-fro' or risking hypothermia. My boyfriend thinks hypothermia would be the better option. FML

#15617500
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17528) - you deserved it (27244)

On 04/03/2011 at 5:35am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I attended a funeral. During the minute of silence, my phone went off. My ringtone is "It's good to be alive". FML

#15616538
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21362) - you deserved it (57055)

On 04/03/2011 at 3:02am - misc - by JJMan217 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I saw my dad's friend across the street working on my neighbor's roof. To continue the airsoft war we'd been having I shot at him with the sniper gun I bought. I hit him, and he fell off the roof. I ran over to see if he was ok. It wasn't my dad's friend. FML

#15431141
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14438) - you deserved it (51438)

On 03/22/2011 at 12:31pm - misc - by FailedSniper (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my son was on Facebook while he was supposed to be studying. He called me a liar and accused me of making up excuses to chew him out. How do I know he was online? He liked and commented on a video I posted. My son is a dumbass. FML

#15398872
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50160) - you deserved it (8532)

On 03/20/2011 at 12:10pm - kids - by parenting_failure (man) - Sent from mobile version



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: