Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

thatotk

Offline (the 05/19/2015 at 9:55pm) | Search for a member

thatotk

1Fucked!

thatotk
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 29 December 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 9125
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About thatotk : You better not pout. You better not cry. You better not shout, I'm telling you why. If you make a sound, you.. will die.

thatotk's page activity

Visits<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 2:25pm<b>Sudoc</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 6:14am<b>JuzReading</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 5:35am<b>lirideout</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 3:28am<b>RandEm2497</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 1:48am<b>annarcheer</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 8:59am<b>Space_Teddy</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 6:41pm<b>jen1682</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 3:20pm<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 10:00pm<b>its_bree</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 5:19am<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 6:37pm<b>stickingems</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 10:35pm<b>neomimaylee</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 1:10am<b>omfgorlaith</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 6:15pm<b>seth7_</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 3:42pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 10:47pm<b>krupa1017</b> - the 03/08/2014 at 3:46pm<b>ticia002</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 9:58am

Fucked!<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 4:05pm

thatotk's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of thatotk's badges

thatotk's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend called me and told me he wanted me to stay the night. I decided to wear my sexiest outfit for him so I put on my kinky nurse outfit and drove over to his house. I let myself in his front door, to which I found 40 of my closest friends staring at me for my surprise birthday party. FML

#5762164
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33995) - you deserved it (19173)

On 10/10/2009 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by perfectmoment - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at work, my husband came in and brought me flowers and a card for our anniversary. I opened the card to find a condom. I ran over and closed the door and we immediately got at it in the middle of my office. Halfway through, I realized I have been laying on the intercom button. FML

#5721043
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9792) - you deserved it (30487)

On 10/08/2009 at 12:32pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out that the student tutor my son advised me to hire was my son's girlfriend. I have been paying her $20 an hour for the last 3 weeks to make out with my son in his room. FML

#5708797
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32404) - you deserved it (15673)

On 10/07/2009 at 7:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out that my sister who is 16 years older than me is actually my biological mother. She and my parents decided it was best that I didn't know who my real mother was, and to be raised by my grandparents as their child. I've always hated my sister. FML

#5701860
327 comments

I agree, your life sucks (175745) - you deserved it (8979)

On 10/07/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by dinosaurman (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was teaching a woodshop class. We were using power tools, including drills, and pieces of pine wood. While helping a kid to hold a piece to practice drilling, he went too far forward with the drill. It went through my hand. FML

#5697763
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47142) - you deserved it (10924)

On 10/07/2009 at 3:05am - work - by screwed (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had a surprise birthday party for my mom who turned 57. About an hour into the party, I look over at my mom and she was grinding all over my best friend while holding a bottle of tequila in her hand, and a pair of leopard skin panties hanging out of her pants. FML

#5640699
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37024) - you deserved it (3654)

On 10/04/2009 at 12:25pm - misc - by KmartFart - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was woken up from a nap by my cat attacking my face. Evidently, my husband thought it would be funny to shine a laser pointer on my cheek. FML

#5608454
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32382) - you deserved it (2953)

On 10/02/2009 at 6:23pm - love - by Zamaria - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend decided to be very naughty and placed her underwear in my backpack. I wish she had told me, because it slipped into a folder that contained my project data for my professor. So, after class, I got sent to the Dean of Students' office to talk about sexual harassment. FML

#5605525
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34936) - you deserved it (2928)

On 10/02/2009 at 3:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I open my front door and saw a covered basket with a card from my girlfriend on it. I picked it up and read, "Hope this cheers you up." I uncovered the basket to find a golden labrador puppy. Its eyes were closed and it wasn't breathing. FML

#5541044
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68935) - you deserved it (2901)

On 09/29/2009 at 12:17am - misc - by rainedaddy (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, was my first day as a bouncer. I was a bit late and didn't meet all the staff. Later that night, some fairly drunk guy was trying to force his way in, I told him we were at capacity and that he would have to wait. He kept trying and I ended up pushing him to the floor. He was the owner. FML

#5519720
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38072) - you deserved it (12789)

On 09/28/2009 at 12:11am - work - by Baboosh (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend got pulled over and arrested for driving with a suspended license. Instead of getting my car impounded, his friend thought he'd do me a favor and drive it back to me. He doesn't know how to drive stick and blew my engine. My boyfriend is in jail and I no longer have a car. FML

#5286823
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37914) - you deserved it (5971)

On 09/16/2009 at 2:12am - love - by takingthebus (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while my girlfriend and I were getting it on, she suddenly stopped and yelled "STOP!". I stopped, scared I'd hurt her. She then yelled "HAMMER TIME!" and started to dance. We never finished. FML

#5286193
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28654) - you deserved it (5093)

On 09/16/2009 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I found out the high school I have been doing at home for the past 3 years isn't accredited and doesn't count for anything. I'm 18 and starting high school as a freshman next year. FML

#5252040
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54866) - you deserved it (17789)

On 09/14/2009 at 2:58pm - misc - by diplomaless (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I played a goth character in my friend's student film with goth clothes, lip ring, eyeliner, etc. We went into Starbucks at break and an elderly man came up to me and said "Your kind is the reason for all the bad stuff in this world" and then spat in my $5 drink. FML

#5141250
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44008) - you deserved it (5079)

On 09/09/2009 at 12:15am - misc - by comet5002 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was sitting on my boyfriends lap and we were hanging out, talking, and enjoying each other's company. Then he looked into my eyes and right when I thought he was going to kiss me, he said "I can feel your heartbeat on my dick." FML

#5136668
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21984) - you deserved it (4373)

On 09/08/2009 at 9:26pm - intimacy - by awkwardbf (woman) - United States (Washington)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: