About thatkidhesh : dropped out of college. now I sponsor kids to college. God's been good. follow me on Twitter for more @heshdesilva. views expressed here are entirely my own, how you take them is up to you.
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thatkidhesh's favorite FMLs
Today, my therapist told me to write any negative thoughts that I had on a piece of paper and then set fire to it. When I lit it in the trash can, huge flames broke out and I had to throw the trash can out my window to keep from setting my house on fire. FML
by Anonymous / 07/11/2013 at 3:10am / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous
by whowhat / 07/11/2013 at 2:26am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, a coworker complimented me on losing weight, and said that she wished she could drop a few pounds too. I was too embarrassed to tell her that the only reason I've lost weight is because I haven't been able to afford to eat. FML
by shouldbehappyiguess / 07/11/2013 at 2:20am / United States (Florida) / Work
Today, I got head lice, so I went to a store to buy medicated shampoo. When checking out the cashier saw my shampoo and asked me to leave immediately to protect the other customers. He didn't let me buy the shampoo. FML
by frustrated / 07/11/2013 at 12:52am / United States (Tennessee) / Health
Today, while jogging, a guy tackled me and got my iPhone. Being a good runner, I caught up with him and grabbed him. Next thing I knew, I was on the ground with a policeman yelling in my ear. The guy got away. FML
by anonymous / 07/05/2013 at 2:11am / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to my parents' house. I recently lost about 30 lbs. My mom hugged me and said, "Aww, you're not my chubby baby girl anymore." She then said she wished I were still fat because she missed it. She's the reason I lost the weight; she used to tease and taunt me. Thanks Mom. FML
by me / 06/28/2013 at 11:51am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/27/2013 at 12:58pm / Finland (Western Finland) / Health
by confusedbagel / 06/27/2013 at 2:22am / United States (California) / Work
by the_lonely_life / 06/26/2013 at 9:02pm / United States / Intimacy
by theunluckylifeofme / 06/26/2013 at 4:33pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 06/26/2013 at 12:42pm / United States (Colorado) / Animals
Today, I used a public restroom. I saw my sister's shoes walk into the stall next to me, so I gave her a little nudge with my foot. We then nudged each other until I walked out and saw a homeless man with the same shoes as my sister. He then tried to hold my hand. FML
by Anonymous / 06/25/2013 at 12:56am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, after going out to dinner with my girlfriend, we went back to my place and things started getting hot. I went in the bathroom and put on a green condom. She wouldn't have sex with me because it looked "like a cucumber" and "cucumbers are nasty." FML
by dan / 06/25/2013 at 12:22am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
by myfavoritesgouda / 06/24/2013 at 1:20am / United States (New York) / Work
Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML
by jgtrflynn / 06/24/2013 at 12:37am / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy
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