About thatguy240 : What do I type here?
thatguy240's FML badges
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
What'cha looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
thatguy240's favorite FMLs
Today, while updating my résumé, I noticed that in my list of achievements it said "Torturing middle school students". I meant "tutoring", but I guess this explains why I'm still unemployed a year after I started looking for a job. FML
by fuckel4 / 07/01/2016 at 4:12pm / United States (Arkansas) / Work
by Anonymous / 07/01/2016 at 2:24pm / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 07/01/2016 at 12:23pm / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Kids
Today, I set up a hidden camera in my room so I could prove that my sister beats me up when my parents aren't home, since they always accuse me of lying about it. When I showed them, they wasted no time accusing me of "provoking" her off-camera. FML
by Anonymous / 07/01/2016 at 10:10am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, my doorbell rang while I was still in bed. I leapt out and immediately got a severe cramp in one leg, then, staggering around trying to throw some clothes on, I scraped the other leg badly enough to draw blood. When I got to the door there was nobody there, just a parcel on the doorstep. FML
by shouldhavestayedinbed / 07/01/2016 at 6:45am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
Today, I'm sleeping in a hotel with my grandparents for 2 days. They both talked in their sleep and snored for almost 3 hours straight, so I moved into the bathtub in the tiny bathroom to try to get some sleep. Just as I was falling asleep, the showerhead started to leak. Back to square one. FML
by tenhut / 07/01/2016 at 12:34am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, my eldest daughter told me about the sharp pains she's been having for the past couple of days. She also told me how she thinks it's really pointy carrots trying to escape her body. She's 11, and going to middle school. FML
by disappointed / 06/30/2016 at 11:31pm / United States (Maryland) / Kids
by bamrd / 06/30/2016 at 9:20pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
by Catnip / 06/30/2016 at 7:42pm / Germany (Hessen) / Love
Today, my sister asked me, while making a cup of green tea with honey, "I wonder why they call it honey," to which I reply, "Probably some Greek or Latin word meaning 'to sweeten'." She stops, turns and with a serious face asks, "Where exactly is Latin?" FML
by Anonymous / 06/30/2016 at 5:11pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boss threw me out of her office during a conference call for daring to correct her. The client fired the company because she subsequently got all the information on the call wrong, and plainly had no idea what was going on. From all the screaming, this is now all my fault. FML
by Anonymous / 06/30/2016 at 4:42pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Work
Today, I have put in many job applications and had many interviews for a variety of positions all of which I am highly qualified for. Today, I heard back from all but one that I am overqualified. Welcome to Walmart. FML
by collegekidproblems / 06/30/2016 at 3:35pm / United States (California) / Work
by mekiswrite / 06/30/2016 at 3:15pm / Canada (Alberta) / Work
by sayroshi / 06/30/2016 at 2:29pm / United States / Kids
Today, while I was riding the bus to work, I noticed the guy sitting across from me had shorts on. He also had no underwear on and I could fully see his "parts" just hanging there. I decided to switch seats but as I stood up to move, the bus jerked. I fell face forward right into his "parts". FML
by Justme / 06/30/2016 at 2:20pm / United States (Montana) / Transportation