Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

teresa96706

Online | Search for a member

teresa96706

6Fucked!

teresa96706teresa96706
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 13 June 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 9606
  • Number of comments : 178
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 27 posted

About teresa96706 : |Friendly|
|Hawaii Girl|
|University life|
|in a relationship|
|loves the aina (land)|
|open minded, generous|
|Only seen snow twice in my life|
|small town girl living in a lonely world|

teresa96706's page activity

Visits<b>panda4545</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 10:34pm<b>Dowbo</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 5:05am<b>z3r0d4z3</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 5:21am<b>stephenseiber1</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 7:16pm<b>_Alanna_xx</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 1:23am<b>Exaspera</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 2:42am<b>qsni</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 12:22am<b>Steve95401</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 10:19pm<b>FutBol_Fan_30</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 10:11pm<b>whereismyb4con</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 11:11pm<b>captainmarrr</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 10:31am<b>ocapi</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 4:56pm<b>torn616</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 3:11pm<b>Deluxe_1</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 11:12pm<b>0mysteriousman0</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 5:40pm<b>MELKOZAR</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 10:00am<b>martin8337</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 7:54am<b>Scryll</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 1:03am

Fucked!<b>Exaspera</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 7:50am<b>Steve95401</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 4:19am<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 6:35am<b>martin8337</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 6:03pm<b>whereismyb4con</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 9:17am<b>BlueDragonDC</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 12:05am

teresa96706's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of teresa96706's badges

teresa96706's favorite FMLs

Today, my long distance boyfriend got angry because I like touching myself while we sext. It "distracts" me from him. I'm sorry you turn me on. FML

#21447742
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22953) - you deserved it (2362)

On 07/26/2015 at 10:02pm - intimacy - by wot02 (woman) - United States

Today, about 30 seconds into my first blowjob, my girlfriend threatened to cut my balls off if I didn't "just fucking cum already". FML

#21446517
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24411) - you deserved it (2206)

On 07/24/2015 at 12:44pm - intimacy - by fuck (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my mom told me that she heard me and my best friend in my room grunting and talking about how hard we were. She said she loved me and accepted me no matter what. Thanks mom, but we were working out. FML

#21445547
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24151) - you deserved it (4891)

On 07/22/2015 at 4:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

#21442030
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33114) - you deserved it (2320)

On 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while lifeguarding over children at work, I started thinking about my girlfriend and got a hard on. Before I realized it, I saved a kid and then hopped out of the pool next to a 5 year old in front of my managers and a little over 50 patrons with a raging boner. My HR meeting is tomorrow. FML

#21437372
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25928) - you deserved it (6617)

On 07/06/2015 at 1:28pm - intimacy - by notacreep - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend called me while I was at work. He sounded very excited and told me he had a surprise for me. He doesn't usually do this kind of thing, so I was excited. When I came home, I found him naked, with "Bone Appetite" written right above his penis. FML

#21432853
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25969) - you deserved it (3361)

On 06/27/2015 at 2:37pm - love - by stillhungry - United States (California)

Today, the new girl told me that a guy at the back of the class was being creepy. I looked over and saw him picking his nose and flinging boogers at the girls sitting in the front. That guy is my boyfriend. FML

#21431826
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26772) - you deserved it (6200)

On 06/25/2015 at 3:16pm - misc - by sweetsixteenyay - United Kingdom (Caerphilly)

Today, my husband and I broke the news to my 10-year-old son that in about 8 months, he'll have a baby brother or sister. I knew he never wanted a sibling, but I didn't expect him to throw a tantrum, then look at me through teary eyes and scream, "Why can't you keep your fucking legs closed?" FML

#21423894
317 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35261) - you deserved it (6972)

On 06/10/2015 at 12:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I found out my husband potty trained my stubborn three year old son who prefers diapers. He managed this by peeing with him and "sword-fighting" with their urine streams. I now have to clean pee off the ground every time he urinates. FML

#21421959
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25146) - you deserved it (2234)

On 06/06/2015 at 9:17pm - kids - by diapersplease (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I asked my boyfriend to come hang out with me. He said he was busy and had to do homework. Since he never studies, I got suspicious and went to check up on him. I found him playing dress-up with his cat. He's 17. FML

#21421616
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26918) - you deserved it (4329)

On 06/06/2015 at 1:52am - animals - by iamfab - Australia (Queensland)

Today, for my birthday, my boyfriend made me a coupon book. I thought it was sweet until I noticed they were all conditional. For example; "Give your boyfriend a blowjob and he'll give you a 10 minute back massage!". They're all like that and he's mad because I refuse to use them. FML

#21417382
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28787) - you deserved it (2925)

On 05/28/2015 at 11:39pm - intimacy - by shmoooopie (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got so used to using this FML app while going to the bathroom that when I opened it, I accidentally peed a little. FML

#21415171
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26204) - you deserved it (10574)

On 05/24/2015 at 9:14pm - misc - by Anon - United States (Ohio)

Today, my grandmother yelled at me for driving erratically. I was "driving" in a video game. FML

Today, I woke up to the sound of my little sister knocking on my door. Today's my birthday, so I thought she'd surprise me with something. Instead, she just asked me, "How's it feel to be a year older and still alone?" I just turned 20. The truth hurts. FML

Today, while teaching my class, I hooked my laptop up to the projector and put on a documentary. I left it playing and went to the toilet. When I came back the whole class was talking to my mother. She must've Skyped me while I was gone and someone answered the call. FML

#21409928
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32623) - you deserved it (7089)

On 05/14/2015 at 8:42am - work - by HiddlePuff - Australia



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: