About sweatypandalove : Go fuck a landmine.
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Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
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sweatypandalove's favorite FMLs
by cdestarac / 01/10/2012 at 1:07am / United States (Texas) / Love
by thankzbabe / 01/04/2012 at 7:32am / United States / Intimacy
by ikungfuyou / 12/27/2011 at 2:11am / United States / Intimacy
by chunkymonkey / 11/23/2011 at 6:54pm / Health
Today, I was working alone in the office with my brother. He's run out of work to do, so has been singing Disney songs loudly and badly, throwing stationery at me, and just now snuck up on me from behind and wrapped duct tape round my face. It's just us in the office next week. FML
by whyarewerelated / 09/08/2011 at 11:41am / United Kingdom (London) / Work
by thatoneguy / 09/05/2011 at 4:23pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
Today, my dad told me I'm no longer allowed to see my boyfriend. Apparently there is a deer camera above my driveway that snaps pictures whenever it senses movement. Too bad I didn't know that when I was giving my boyfriend head in the driveway. FML
by Username / 08/31/2011 at 3:36am / United States / Intimacy
Today, the guy I've had the biggest crush on came to my house to pick me up for our first date. As we were leaving, my father screams out "Do you still have diarrhea?" I don't have diarrhea. My dad thinks he's so funny. FML
by Anon / 08/04/2011 at 4:30am / United States (Nevada) / Love
by ugly / 06/26/2011 at 3:02am / United States / Kids
by sllaggy / 04/18/2011 at 5:34am / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML
by ouch / 03/28/2011 at 11:33pm / United States (Arizona) / Love
by straightasaneedle / 02/02/2011 at 12:11pm / Germany (Hessen) / Love
by Anonymous / 12/18/2010 at 6:47pm / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for cumming inside her because she didnt want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. She's on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML
by Tai / 10/31/2010 at 9:30am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/29/2010 at 9:23pm / United States (Minnesota) / Love
- Today, I found out my ex from over a year ago is still very much in love with me. I found this out… Today, my mom told me my grandfather, the most influential man in my life, died. I had a breakdown… Today, I was smashing my lover and as soon I was about to nut, I tried to pull out but I stubbed my…