suslord

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Offline (the 12/27/2014 at 7:55pm)

suslord

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 671
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About suslord : The gang's all here.
Supreme.

suslord's page activity

Visits<b>PrincessBambii</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 3:27am<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 4:15pm<b>iPixelCheese</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 2:22pm<b>SychoticFML</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 11:35pm<b>SuperCaroline131</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 4:20am<b>ihavenolifehaha</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 2:43am<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 6:16pm<b>El_Mojiiito</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 6:42am<b>hulopro</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 5:22pm<b>jcross01</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 11:12pm<b>kayse</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 12:41pm<b>pratikp03</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 9:07pm<b>mnie</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 3:47pm<b>windell</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 3:21pm<b>SharpShot86</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 9:23pm<b>bolaric</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 5:08pm<b>acidburnz1107</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 12:09am<b>CandyDawg</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 11:39pm

suslord's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of suslord's badges

suslord's favorite FMLs

Today, my brother thought jumping out and punching me in the stomach would cure my hiccups. Yeah. Didn't work. FML

by Anonymous / 08/27/2014 at 5:56pm / United States (Oregon) / Health

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. I had to use the bathroom part way through, and ended up taking the foulest dump of my life. I cracked open a window on my way out, but my boyfriend's dad went in soon after, quickly retching and booming "What the fuck?!" FML

by great 1st impression / 05/25/2014 at 12:09pm / United Kingdom (Derby) / Miscellaneous

Today, to teach my 14-year-old son a serious lesson for bullying a child at school again, I grounded him for the rest of the year. He just snorted and said, "Cool, I'll just jack off all year then! Thanks, mum!" and happily retreated to his bedroom. FML

by Satan's Mum / 05/06/2014 at 2:38pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids

Today, I asked the girl I like if she had her eye on anyone, subtly hinting that I wanted to date her. I sat there while she confessed her love for her cousin. FML

by Wowthanks / 05/04/2014 at 8:13pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, I asked my son to go to the grocery store across the street and pick up some lettuce. He sighed and said, "Why don't you just order it on Amazon?" FML

by nh-Amazon / 04/27/2014 at 7:01pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, my non-English-speaking grandma bought me a new t-shirt. It would've been sweet if it didn't have the word "bondage" written on the back in pretty, bold letters. I had no choice but to wear it while we went shopping. FML

by Anonymous / 03/23/2014 at 12:59pm / Egypt / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out what it feels like to be slapped in the face with a potted cactus. FML

by thanksdad / 03/16/2014 at 3:28pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Health

Today, I waited on a gentleman and his lady friend at my restaurant. They ordered some of the most expensive items on the menu, and I thought I'd get a nice tip. Instead, he tipped me a scrap of paper, containing a drawing of a cock jizzing on a caricature of my face, and the word "Thanks." FML

by Anonymous / 03/16/2014 at 2:53pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I found out that my 15-year-old son is a prolific creator of My Little Pony themed hentai. I'm not a judgmental man, but he's probably going to hell. FML

by ashamed father / 03/09/2014 at 6:32pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I went to an auction for the first time. When the run-down house I wanted to bid for came up, I opened bidding at £12,000 and surprisingly won. Feeling pleased, I turned to the person next to me and said, "Lucky me!" She replied, "Yes, lucky you!" and then under her breath said, "Cockhead". FML

by Anonymous / 03/06/2014 at 9:52pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I was playing an intense game of Flappy Bird. I was so excited at being about to beat my high score that I got a hard-on. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2014 at 5:26pm / Russian Federation (Moskva) / Intimacy

Today, on Facebook, someone wrote a status implying that she was going to kill herself. I called a mutual friend, asking to check up on her. The next status the girl puts up said, "Someone thought I was going to commit suicide! Haha what a loser!" FML

by Anonymous / 02/26/2014 at 4:31am / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, I joined my friends out birthday clubbing. After I'd gotten a little drunk, a few guys asked for my number. I rattled off random numbers, until I accidentally said my mother's. Guess who woke up to a text at 2:17 in the morning, containing a picture of a penis. FML

by Anonymous / 01/08/2014 at 7:53pm / United States (South Carolina) / Miscellaneous