Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

suslord

Search for a member

suslord
  • Town/Country : Fremont, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 90
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About suslord : The gang's all here.
Supreme.

suslord's last visitors

pratikp03usmcfieldswindellCandyDawgBlack_Knight80MilkshakeSwagger

suslord's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of suslord's badges

suslord's favorite FMLs

Today, my non-English-speaking grandma bought me a new t-shirt. It would've been sweet if it didn't have the word "bondage" written on the back in pretty, bold letters. I had no choice but to wear it while we went shopping. FML

#21094283
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32127) - you deserved it (3084)

On 03/23/2014 at 12:59pm - misc - by Anonymous - Egypt

Today, I found out what it feels like to be slapped in the face with a potted cactus. FML

#21088237
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39963) - you deserved it (5222)

On 03/16/2014 at 3:28pm - health - by thanksdad (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I waited on a gentleman and his lady friend at my restaurant. They ordered some of the most expensive items on the menu, and I thought I'd get a nice tip. Instead, he tipped me a scrap of paper, containing a drawing of a cock jizzing on a caricature of my face, and the word "Thanks." FML

#21088206
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40241) - you deserved it (3292)

On 03/16/2014 at 2:53pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that my 15-year-old son is a prolific creator of My Little Pony themed hentai. I'm not a judgmental man, but he's probably going to hell. FML

#21082455
390 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39070) - you deserved it (7057)

On 03/09/2014 at 6:32pm - kids - by ashamed father (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to an auction for the first time. When the run-down house I wanted to bid for came up, I opened bidding at £12,000 and surprisingly won. Feeling pleased, I turned to the person next to me and said, "Lucky me!" She replied, "Yes, lucky you!" and then under her breath said, "Cockhead". FML

#21080041
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34036) - you deserved it (7887)

On 03/06/2014 at 9:52pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I was playing an intense game of Flappy Bird. I was so excited at being about to beat my high score that I got a hard-on. FML

#21074219
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37053) - you deserved it (16416)

On 02/28/2014 at 5:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Russian Federation (Moskva)

Today, on Facebook, someone wrote a status implying that she was going to kill herself. I called a mutual friend, asking to check up on her. The next status the girl puts up said, "Someone thought I was going to commit suicide! Haha what a loser!" FML

#21071970
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46581) - you deserved it (3974)

On 02/26/2014 at 4:31am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, I joined my friends out birthday clubbing. After I'd gotten a little drunk, a few guys asked for my number. I rattled off random numbers, until I accidentally said my mother's. Guess who woke up to a text at 2:17 in the morning, containing a picture of a penis. FML

#21022033
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26108) - you deserved it (33842)

On 01/08/2014 at 7:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: