summerguy97

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summerguy97

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7518
  • Number of comments : 166
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About summerguy97 : She wants the D!!!

summerguy97's page activity

Visits<b>bryce0110</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 1:47pm<b>rivimatt</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 11:55pm<b>Idgits</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 4:45am<b>totallynotemily</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 5:59pm<b>jamaarlove</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 2:33am<b>jill97</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 1:49am<b>IAm123</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 2:16pm<b>tamannab97</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 7:36pm<b>NateshN</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 6:13pm<b>Superwalkatural</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 6:07am<b>HelenKeller1</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 1:46am<b>justolyvia</b> - the 09/12/2015 at 3:53pm<b>Theater_Chef_3</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 10:26pm<b>ChocolateScyther</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 11:50am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 7:36pm<b>kukumber</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 3:43pm<b>_Willa_</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 12:33pm<b>Slerth</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 12:23am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 1:36am<b>Jodencrans</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 8:04pm

summerguy97's FML badges

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100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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summerguy97's favorite FMLs

Today, while going down on my girlfriend, I finally managed to give her an orgasm. During that orgasm, she tore out a clump of my hair, causing me to scream in pain. She scowled and said, "Ah shut it, ya little bitch." FML

by dating walter white's gf apparently / 04/06/2013 at 3:13pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, my mom has forbidden me from drinking skim milk, because my sister is upset that I'm skinnier than her. The same sister who refuses to drink any other milk than 2% chocolate. FML

by jll14 / 03/31/2013 at 6:27pm / Malaysia (Sabah) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to visit some family out of state for my niece's birthday. I couldn't think of what to get an 8-year-old so I got her a Barbie doll. Everyone else got her money, iPods, game consoles, etc. When she got to mine she asked "how do I turn it on?" Then threw it away when she couldn't. FML

by The_Black_Jesus / 03/31/2013 at 9:32am / United States / Kids

Today, my now ex-girlfriend posted on Facebook that I called her a "fucking bitch". Our mutual friends were all outraged, and demanded that I treat her with respect. What she failed to mention was that I said it after finding out that she's been sleeping with my "best friend" for the past year. FML

by Hellosinglelife / 03/28/2013 at 6:35pm / Trinidad and Tobago (Saint George) / Love

Today, I was chatting with a co-worker, and she mentioned she has trouble swallowing pills. I replied that I'm lucky, because I have next to no gag reflex. Half the guys at the other registers abruptly went silent, and I'm now being constantly hit on. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2013 at 4:56pm / France (Champagne-Ardenne) / Work

Today, I was at the pool when I saw a man eating the food I had ordered near my seat. I immediately ran up to him and asked him to stop stealing my food. I took the food away and threw it in the trash. Seconds later the attendant came out with my actual food. FML

by Hahamaster333 / 03/27/2013 at 9:02pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

by anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm / United States (Hawaii) / Intimacy

Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm for the first time. She's a screamer. Her dog must have thought I was attacking her, because he immediately came over and started savaging me. FML

by Anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 2:26pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that what my husband meant by "we should try swinging" is "I really want to have sex with this one friend of yours, and if you so much as make eye contact with any guy I'm going to totally flip out and threaten to kill him and you." FML

by SwinginSolo / 03/26/2013 at 8:07am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was walking my dog when he stopped in the middle of the street and took a dump. I looked around furtively but saw nobody, so I just kept walking. I stepped in it on the way back home. FML

by BaliTheDog / 03/24/2013 at 7:01pm / France / Animals

Today, I found out that my picture from a dating profile was so "hilarious" that people have been posting it on Instagram with mean captions. FML

by And I'm still single / 03/24/2013 at 4:59am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, after I had changed my number to get away from my abusive ex, my mom decided to give him my new one. She insists that I need to give him another chance. FML

by Anonymous / 03/23/2013 at 4:15pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend of seven years. He stared at me, then said "Yeah, okay then. I'm gonna watch TV now." He then turned on the TV and watched Top Gun. Not quite the response I was hoping for. FML

by Jessica / 03/23/2013 at 3:00pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I was feeling sick and fainted while teaching my kindergarten class. I came to when one boy poured a cup of water on my face. Three kids were crying into my walkie talkie telling the office I was dead, and the rest of the class had disappeared. FML

by kindergarten teacher / 03/23/2013 at 9:25am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was feeling a bit insecure about my body, and I told my boyfriend I don't know how he can even stand to have sex with me. He replied, "I know, right?" FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2013 at 7:21pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love