About stevenJB : 9/28/2016
Hey, you're my latest stalker. feel free to message me here or on kik "Lockolaine". otherwise here's the run down of me.
-I (used to) play guitar and bass, will start in again soon.
-enlisting in the Marines(leave for BC in feb)
-5´11 or 510 depending on who measures me
-gamer, mostly Wow, WoT, overwatch, starcraft 2 and fallout lately.
-listens to rock, metal mostly, a little bit of country, punk, some pop I just hear on the radio, symphony and some jazz as well.
-native American and used to have hair over a meter long.
-enjoy watching movies/anime
-can sing, but not amazingly
-heavy machinery operator/mechanic
-lives in South Dakota
-love dogs, though I don't have one myself :(
-enjoys firearms and long range shooting
-Love reading books, more into fantasy genre.
-I'll do a fuck for a fuck so feel free.
-my fml profile is around or close to 5 years old.
-enjoy running and working out.
--if you got any questions feel free to ask--
About stevenJB : 9/28/2016
stevenJB's FML badges
You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
stevenJB's favorite FMLs
Today, my wardrobe door jammed, and I couldn't change out into some nice clothes for my date. On the way there, my car broke down. Not wanting to be late and make a bad impression, I scuttled the rest of the way, only to find I'd been stood up. FML
by cheesfactor / 05/19/2012 at 3:50pm / Bulgaria (Ruse) / Miscellaneous
by maggierose171 / 05/19/2012 at 11:08am / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy
by msassy / 05/18/2012 at 10:46pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health
by Great. / 05/18/2012 at 11:05am / United States (Montana) / Love
by Vero / 05/17/2012 at 11:02am / Austria (Oberosterreich) / Love
Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML
by smart move there / 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm / Ireland (Kildare) / Intimacy
Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML
by lafinesse / 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm / Miscellaneous
by anonymous / 05/14/2012 at 6:31am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy
Today, I found out that a family member found a publisher for his book; his badly written, terribly sourced, historically inaccurate book that insults and misrepresents most world cultures and religions. If this actually makes it to print, I'll never be able to use my maiden name again. FML
by AmatureLitCritic / 05/14/2012 at 3:37am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML
by 504-A1 / 05/11/2012 at 6:02pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 05/11/2012 at 3:30pm / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Kids
by polimeros / 05/09/2012 at 6:19pm / Mexico (Queretaro de Arteaga) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 05/08/2012 at 9:59pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went with my boyfriend to the optometrist for him to buy contact lenses for the first time. He said the detail was much better than glasses. I excitedly asked him if he could see my freckles better now, and after a long and disappointed look at my face, he said "Nope, just more acne." FML
by Anonymous / 05/06/2012 at 12:41am / Canada (Alberta) / Love
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got…