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starw0lf

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starw0lf
  • Town/Country : Maine, USA
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1210
  • Number of comments : 64
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About starw0lf : I have been an FML reader (lurker) for a while and decided to make an account just recently.

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starw0lf's favorite FMLs

Today, I argued with my girlfriend over her constantly wasting our money on acupuncture. She said if I could prove it was baloney, she would stop. After I showed her copious amounts of scientific proof debunking it as pseudo-science, she told me we're "taking a break" from our relationship. FML

#18987480
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19659) - you deserved it (9747)

On 02/03/2012 at 9:48pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I was left at the altar. For the second time. By the same man. FML

#18949271
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30323) - you deserved it (54904)

On 01/30/2012 at 12:37am - love - by givingup (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I got really bored so I posted on Facebook "Someone should kidnap me for the day." My mom commented, "The only things willing to kidnap you are aliens, and that would be because they'd mistaken you for a cow." 16 people liked her comment. FML

#18860865
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32628) - you deserved it (9599)

On 01/20/2012 at 10:15am - misc - by LonerCow (woman) - United States

Today, I'm supposed to start my new job as a Crime Scene Tech. Instead, I managed to electrocute myself with my hairdryer. I'll now have to attempt to explain to them that I really am qualified to safely operate an electrostatic lifting device, and other expensive equipment. FML

#18842553
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17297) - you deserved it (5790)

On 01/18/2012 at 6:15am - work - by Lyn (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I hosted a "Night Out Against Crime" party at our local park. Only three people came, they robbed our fundraiser booth. FML

#18839775
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22768) - you deserved it (4304)

On 01/17/2012 at 10:31pm - money - by no money anymore - United States

Today, I actually took pleasure in sniffing my armpits after 2 days of not showering. FML

#18783531
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7049) - you deserved it (34630)

On 01/12/2012 at 8:34am - health - by Anon (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was surprised that my husband suggested we take a shower together to save water. He also suggested we should wear our bathing suits so we don't have to see each others "privates." FML

#18744255
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49250) - you deserved it (4207)

On 01/08/2012 at 7:24am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I couldn't contain my laughter when a patient told me she'd named her unborn daughter Twinkie. FML

#18728006
398 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25775) - you deserved it (3601)

On 01/06/2012 at 5:49pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I realized that I've been intentionally causing arguments with my husband because the spare bed is more comfortable. FML

#18575911
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8658) - you deserved it (29576)

On 12/22/2011 at 12:31am - intimacy - by sninapeters - United States

Today, my mom was feeling down because of her gray hairs. In an attempt to cheer her up, I suggested that she dye them. Her hair turned orange. FML

#18569978
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20590) - you deserved it (4743)

On 12/21/2011 at 12:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out my boyfriend has been using my moisturiser as lube when he wanks. It's $90 per bottle. FML

#18542625
335 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26859) - you deserved it (11845)

On 12/18/2011 at 5:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, at my job as a waitress, I fell, landed on my ass, managing not to spill the drinks or drop the food in my hands. A little boy yelled "NINJA WAITRESS!" Every one at work has been calling me that all day, and purposely been trying to trip me to see if I could do it again. FML

#18390822
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33489) - you deserved it (5165)

On 11/30/2011 at 12:39am - work - by immy504 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I came home from a weekend trip with some friends, and walked straight in on my girlfriend cheating on me. She burst into tears and began apologizing. Her exact words were "I'm so sorry! I thought you were coming back tomorrow." FML

#18326234
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37627) - you deserved it (1960)

On 11/23/2011 at 12:03pm - love - by cheated - United States (New Jersey)

Today, as a support worker, I spent 45 minutes making various attempts to calm a violent autistic kid. Just as soon as I was sure the crisis was over, he beat me as hard as he could with the "Things I Can Do When I'm Mad" book I'd given him. FML

#18244836
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21318) - you deserved it (3011)

On 11/14/2011 at 8:37am - work - by metallifreak44 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, and all day, I was forced to listen to one of the kids in my apartment building play their recorder loudly and horribly. She started over whenever she missed a note. I was sick, was getting a migraine from it, and couldn't ask her to stop without her mom yelling at me. FML

#18242720
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20468) - you deserved it (2942)

On 11/13/2011 at 11:46pm - health - by mintypoison (woman) - United States (Washington)



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