starryeyed_0811

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starryeyed_0811

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 27 January 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2285
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About starryeyed_0811 : That's my dog. Not me....just in case there was any confusion. I love FMLs! I get some type of twisted joy by reading other people's bad experiences. Well yea that's it. "Hugga Mugga." : )

starryeyed_0811's page activity

Visits<b>frranman</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 8:38pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 7:20pm<b>PostItSticker</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 6:44pm<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 1:28pm<b>andyhitts25</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 2:55am<b>flufee2</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 4:28pm<b>suplarai</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 10:58pm<b>Katiakatxx</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 8:16pm<b>StiffPvtParts</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 6:22am<b>Just_Ya</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 7:49am<b>rebecca_xo</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 2:36pm<b>amtkldr</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 11:53am<b>poulkrebs</b> - the 11/11/2013 at 4:54pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 7:54pm<b>RichardDickanus</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 7:41pm<b>vj21</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 6:17pm<b>chargers2588</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 11:36am<b>vanessuhm</b> - the 10/24/2013 at 5:26am

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starryeyed_0811's favorite FMLs

Today, my greatgrandpa came over for dinner. Halfway through the meal, he pooped himself. My family went through the rest of the meal acting like we hadn't noticed to avoid embarassment. As it was coming to an end, my sister came home and immediately yelled, "Ew! Did someone poop?" He cried. FML

by PoorGramps / 12/09/2009 at 2:39am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finished a 50 page term end thesis essay on the history of Russia. Looking over the final requirements once more, I find I made just a tiny little mistake. It was supposed to be a thesis on "Prussia". The paper's due tomorrow. FML

by WTFFAIL / 12/03/2009 at 4:08am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I asked my boss a simple question about a problem I was having with a project I am currently doing. He replied: ''You don't worry your sweet little ass about it babe". My boss is my girlfriend's father. Nice. FML

by GiWi / 11/18/2009 at 11:45am / Ireland (Cork) / Work

Today, I had a police officer come to my house because I've been reported missing. My friends online decided to call the police because I haven't signed in for 6 days. FML

by iheartvodka / 11/07/2009 at 1:55am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was babysitting a really annoying kid who wouldn't listen to me, and threw his food through the kitchen, so I punished him. When his mother came home he ran to her and said, "Mommy, mommy, it's not true what you told me, fat people are NOT nice!" FML

by Chubby / 11/02/2009 at 3:39pm / Belgium (Antwerpen) / Kids

Today, I was out for a nice walk and saw a man being attacked by a large crowd. Instinctively I ran to help him. I pushed one "thug" off him and that little time allowed him to escape. I later found out the man I saved had just keyed someone's car and they had intervened. Guess whose car. FML

Today, I am in a very long line at the supermarket, gazing about in complete boredom when I spot a lady cradling what appears to be a cute newborn baby. Being enamored of all babies, I get off the line, go over and say "Oh, what a cute little baby!" The lady was holding a coconut. FML

by BEE / 10/10/2009 at 6:35pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my college roomate and I received our first pieces of mail. We were very excited because our mailbox wasn't empty anymore. She got a package of home baked cookies in the mail from her family. I got a letter from a stranger in prison. FML

by mahlee / 10/06/2009 at 12:32am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I found out he was seeing someone behind my back: my ex-boyfriend. FML

by Anon / 10/03/2009 at 7:43am / Australia (Australian Capital Territory) / Love

Today, I was in a video chat with an old friend who I haven't talked to in years, and my mom walks in. The first thing she says is, "Did you close the toilet after you pooped? Cause today on the news I heard that your poop particles can fly up to 25 feet, landing on your toothbrush." FML

by Poop / 10/01/2009 at 9:09pm / United States (New Jersey) / Health

Today, I was working at a hospital-level rest home. I was making the rounds when I noticed a woman was sitting in her (electric) wheelchair in the middle of the hall. Going closer I saw her battery was flat so I said "Uh-oh! Looks like you've died." She bawled her eyes out and said "Not yet." FML

by Anonymous / 09/09/2009 at 5:58am / New Zealand (Otago) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met some of my boyfriend's family for the first time. His aunt said I was really cute, which made me happy. As we were leaving I said "Your aunt thought I was cute." His reply..."Yeah, well, my aunt's on drugs". FML

by me / 09/06/2009 at 5:33pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, I was cutting the grass when I saw a man staring at me from my neighbor's garage. This went on for 5 minutes until I finally yelled 'hello'. There was no response, and I was creeped out, so I called my neighbor. It was a life-sized Paul McCartney cutout. FML

by cachow / 09/06/2009 at 12:35am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I skipped class to take the girl I like to the airport, and after giving her a goodbye hug I kissed her on the cheek. She laughed and said "Maybe we should discuss some boundaries when I get back." FML

by strikeout / 09/03/2009 at 10:47pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I finished writing the most perfect love letter for this girl at summer school. At the end of the letter I signed: Your secret admirer. Cute, right? Not really. Turns out I was so anxious to finish the letter that I ended up writing my name at the bottom. FML

by footyfallout / 08/16/2009 at 1:17am / Canada (Quebec) / Love