starryeyed_0811

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starryeyed_0811

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 27 January 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2199
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About starryeyed_0811 : That's my dog. Not me....just in case there was any confusion. I love FMLs! I get some type of twisted joy by reading other people's bad experiences. Well yea that's it. "Hugga Mugga." : )

starryeyed_0811's page activity

Visits<b>frranman</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 8:38pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 7:20pm<b>PostItSticker</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 6:44pm<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 1:28pm<b>andyhitts25</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 2:55am<b>flufee2</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 4:28pm<b>suplarai</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 10:58pm<b>Katiakatxx</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 8:16pm<b>StiffPvtParts</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 6:22am<b>Just_Ya</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 7:49am<b>rebecca_xo</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 2:36pm<b>amtkldr</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 11:53am<b>poulkrebs</b> - the 11/11/2013 at 4:54pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 7:54pm<b>RichardDickanus</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 7:41pm<b>vj21</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 6:17pm<b>chargers2588</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 11:36am<b>vanessuhm</b> - the 10/24/2013 at 5:26am

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starryeyed_0811's favorite FMLs

Today, I got into a fight with my girlfriend. After yelling and arguing my point, my cat got up and jumped up next to her on the bed. He sat down, and they both glared at me until I left. FML

by Anonymous / 12/03/2012 at 2:02pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, my friend spilt orange juice all over my iPad. She then went ahead to clean it off by rinsing it with water. FML

by Ashley / 12/02/2012 at 5:16am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was stuck in the bathroom yelling for someone to get me toilet paper. My grandpa slips a small leaf under the door and says, "This is what I used in my day." FML

by Obi1Shinobi / 10/30/2012 at 10:27am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my family and I are sitting in our house while Hurricane Sandy is going on. My grandma is freaking out because she believes it's our recently deceased dog Sandy getting revenge for putting her to sleep and getting a new dog. FML

by With_Love929 / 10/29/2012 at 5:45pm / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, I realized that my life would make an excellent meme: Nerd girl goes to college, finally loses virginity; gets chlamydia. FML

by Unfortunate / 10/07/2012 at 8:24pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I found out my little brother is a highly committed Nazi. He goes to meetings and everything, my parents think it's great he is "getting out and developing a social life." FML

by he is going to hell / 09/18/2012 at 5:46pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met a really cute girl at a club. At first, she told me I was cute. Then, she slurred that I look like "a spork on legs." Then she sprayed the inside of my mouth with vomit as she kissed me. FML

by anonymous / 09/02/2012 at 6:31pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, the pharmacist warned me that my antibiotics might cause slight gastrointestinal distress. The fact that I have been on the john for the past 90 minutes drenched in sweat would lead me to believe our definitions of "slight" are a bit different. FML

by jdch_99 / 08/29/2012 at 9:12am / United States / Health

Today, I was rotated to the graveyard shift at my job. My only co-worker is a twenty-something Paris Hilton wannabe who won't shut up about her belief that she's the reincarnation of Whitney Houston. FML

by bellsucker / 08/04/2012 at 6:15pm / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, my girlfriend opened my refrigerator and began her standard moan: "You're a pig, you never clean up. Look at that egg, it makes me want to throw up, it's gone black, it’s covered in fuzz, IT'S GOT HAIR ON IT!" I got up to check it out. It was a Kiwi fruit. FML

by opinaise / 08/02/2012 at 9:00am / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Love

Today, I took my 2-year-old son to the ear doctor, since he'd stopped responding whenever I call him. The doctor told me that his ears are just fine. He's just ignoring me. FML

by fml / 07/29/2012 at 8:20am / Japan (Saitama) / Kids

Today, my mom wanted to send me a picture of me at graduation, saying that I looked pretty in it. It was a picture of a different girl; definitely not me. Way to go, mom. FML

by Anonymous / 07/08/2012 at 11:17am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to Busch Gardens. Trying to cool off, I got on a ride that soaked me to the bone. For the rest of the time I was there, my bra was visible through my clothes, along with the "Hell Yeah" printed on my underwear. FML

by taylortotscx / 05/27/2012 at 1:15pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my husband is the biological father of my baby sister. FML

by Anonymous / 05/10/2012 at 4:17pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, feeling desperate, I asked my dad for advice on how to get a girl. He asked me why I want to even date. I panicked and said I just wanted to make someone happy. He told me that if I wanted to make someone happy, I should "just start by getting a goddamn vasectomy". FML

by AnonymousUser / 05/04/2012 at 8:01pm / Australia (Queensland) / Love