About ss521 : Hi! I like to go on this site on my phone when I'm bored or sad because it makes me laugh. Although, I am very easily amused. But um yeah. not much that's interesting about me. I'm very friendly and love to talk and meet new people tho!
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ss521's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 05/13/2013 at 7:51pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
by gamerguru13 / 04/21/2013 at 8:26am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/19/2013 at 10:55pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
Today, I finally got to conduct my first questioning of a suspect, who had been arrested in connection with a car theft. As I recited the Miranda warning to him, my mind went totally blank, and after a few seconds, he sarcastically continued the speech for me. FML
by Anonymous / 01/17/2013 at 12:15pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work
by Obi1Shinobi / 10/30/2012 at 10:27am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML
by -___- / 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Kids
by Optimus_Prime97 / 05/02/2012 at 10:39pm / United States / Money
by uh-oh / 03/25/2012 at 1:49am / Australia (New South Wales) / Animals
by Anonymous / 11/24/2011 at 5:35am / United Kingdom / Work
by Anonymous / 04/03/2011 at 11:14am / United States (Texas) / Love
by lookslikeaboyapparently / 10/19/2010 at 5:23pm / United Kingdom (Falkirk) / Miscellaneous
Today, my husband and I took a walk on the wharf. We walked by a Wax Museum and in front of the museum there was a bench with a very realistic wax man sitting on it. I got very close to his face and yelled over to my husband how realistic the wax man looked. Just then, he coughed. FML
by Anonymous / 02/13/2010 at 8:21pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML
by ....... / 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids
by yourmom / 06/16/2009 at 12:06am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, it's my birthday. I have gotten three calls all day. The first one was my fiancé, saying he wanted his ring back. The second one was my best friend, confessing to me that she had been sleeping with my fiancé for the past three months. The third was the dentist's office singing me a happy birthday. FML
by Anonymous / 05/14/2009 at 1:43pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…