snippit

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Offline (the 10/10/2015 at 6:49am)

snippit

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2182
  • Number of comments : 68
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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snippit's page activity

Visits<b>shebewoofle</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 10:33am<b>mggorman88</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 12:11am<b>nwaugh72</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 4:55pm<b>thomasrasmussen7</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 9:37pm<b>FaultInMyStars</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 12:17am<b>WaistDownUnder</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 5:16pm<b>Smoot7</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 1:07am<b>sisas</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 9:41am<b>sophzxc</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 7:15am<b>xReDMemory</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 7:26am<b>simplysarcastics</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 7:22pm<b>MissEris</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 2:23pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 9:09am<b>bigjenny19735</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 3:30pm<b>Rozza17</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 6:59am<b>gracehi</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 6:11am<b>andy594328</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 11:28pm<b>heirofhope</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 11:58pm

Fucked!<b>mggorman88</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 6:10am

snippit's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of snippit's badges

snippit's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend used various infomercial phrases like, "Wait, there's more!" during sex. FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2012 at 1:16am / United States (Nebraska) / Intimacy

Today, my mom threw my tampons in the garbage and said that from now on, I'll be buying pads instead. Turns out she read a scare story going around by email that all the local teens are soaking their tampons in alcohol and inserting them anally to secretly get drunk. FML

by jannister / 08/13/2012 at 3:25pm / Germany (Thuringen) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was digging in my lawn, trying to ignore the suspicious glances coming from my nosy fuckball of a neighbor. When he asked what I was doing, I replied with dripping sarcasm, that I was digging up the schoolkids I killed last year. Fifteen minutes later, the cops he called arrived. FML

by diggingaplotforone / 08/11/2012 at 7:47pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work, I was forced to nod and smile as a pregnant, fifteen-year-old, brain-dead Jersey Shore wannabe cussed me out for being rude by using words from a "foreign language" during our conversation. I used the word "pretentious." FML

by mikeissad / 08/11/2012 at 3:37pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I received a "get well soon" card in the mail, which I found just a little odd, since I was feeling completely fine. Not an hour later, I tripped and fell down a flight of stairs. FML

by Anonymous / 07/24/2012 at 1:36pm / United States / Health

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

by Bontempi / 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, when I woke up, I noticed something crawling on my bed. A white faced wasp was dragging the corpse of a rather large spider. I'm not sure what I was more disturbed about; the fact that the wasp was dragging something twice its size, or that these bugs even live in my house. FML

by klanciee / 07/15/2012 at 10:00pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed making out. He then tried to unhook my bra. After a full minute of trying unsuccessfully, he shouted "Fuck you, bra!" before hiding his face in the pillows. FML

by Anonymous / 07/01/2012 at 7:08pm / Intimacy

Today, I discovered my cat's favorite hobby: sitting butthole-first on my favorite makeup brush. FML

by audreyav / 06/30/2012 at 4:10am / United States (Oregon) / Animals

Today, I saw a large spider carry away the body of a dead spider in the bathroom. In my anthropology class, we learned one of the first signs of civilization is caring for the dead. First, they become civilized, and next, they take over. I will never sleep again. FML

by BloodFaerie / 06/30/2012 at 2:49am / United States (Georgia) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found out that the only way I can convince my husband to start working out is by convincing him that we are training for when the "zombie outbreak" happens. FML

by zombieguyswife / 06/28/2012 at 7:44pm / United States (Missouri) / Health

Today, I went to see a movie with my girlfriend and a few others. Mid-way through, I noticed my girlfriend giving a hand-job to my best friend. I couldn't believe my eyes, and I confronted them. He claimed he had been asleep, she claimed she was mopping up a spill, and I'm now single again. FML

by aranya / 06/14/2012 at 6:51pm / Netherlands (Overijssel) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend ended our relationship. He called me from his mobile phone, claimed to be a trauma surgeon, and told me with a bad German accent that my "boyfriend" had been in a fatal car crash earlier in the day. What the hell is wrong with this idiot? FML

by Anonymous / 05/23/2012 at 1:20pm / Switzerland (Zurich) / Love

Today, I was browsing the web on my boyfriend's laptop, when I idly clicked a bookmark. It turned out to be his private blog, where he most recently spoke in very creepy detail about his efforts to make me love him, remarking that, "Soon, I'll plant my seed in her breeding hips." FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2012 at 4:49pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I tried to swallow a spoonful of cinnamon. I ended up vomiting chunks of burgers, all while bleeding from the nose and suffering throbbing testicles. I then had to clean it all up. FML

by TLJ321 / 05/18/2012 at 3:41am / Health