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snippit
  • Town/Country : Australia
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 520
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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snippit's favorite FMLs

Today, I met a guy at a bar and we went back to my room. We start having sex and about 30 seconds in he stops and says it's not right - he likes me too much for a one night stand. He gives me his number, a kiss on the cheek and leaves. Turns out he already came. I call his phone - wrong number. FML

#139747
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73356) - you deserved it (17920)

On 02/25/2009 at 11:51pm - intimacy - by jsw029 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted me to be her first and last...with plenty of people in between. FML

#102962
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59515) - you deserved it (4731)

On 02/22/2009 at 10:10am - intimacy - by Charles (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I realized the annoying squealing I hear every night isn't my guinea pig. Apparently my brothers girlfriend makes that sound when they have sex. FML

#62926
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41539) - you deserved it (2714)

On 02/17/2009 at 8:00pm - intimacy - by KTK (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was passing a building and saw a fat, ugly person inside. I started to laugh and noticed it was my reflection. FML

#13325
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10335) - you deserved it (51535)

On 02/07/2009 at 1:16pm - misc - by name50 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I came home early from work and discovered my husband wearing a black babydoll nightdress, black stockings and high heels... He says it helps him to relax. FML

#5105
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28765) - you deserved it (2177)

On 02/02/2009 at 4:29am - misc - by a268 - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)

Today, I opened a packet of cereal and it exploded on my keyboard; now, my keyboard crackles. FML

#556
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12647) - you deserved it (9228)

On 12/20/2008 at 3:16am - misc - by Rabzouz - Sent from mobile version

Today, I surprise my girlfriend by turning up at her flat on her twenty-fourth birthday. She gets up from the couch as I enter and I shout: "Tonight, my cock is going to stab you twenty-four times!" (Okay, that's not smart). That's when her father glances over from the couch and greets me. FML

#509
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8332) - you deserved it (45949)

On 12/13/2008 at 10:58pm - intimacy - by Mateo - Sent from mobile version



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

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