smiling_elephant

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smiling_elephant

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 10812
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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smiling_elephant's page activity

Visits<b>anonymous0110902</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 9:58am<b>BlondBombShll88</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 5:22pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:35pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 12:24am<b>omgwtfswak</b> - the 09/06/2009 at 3:56pm<b>username666</b> - the 05/21/2009 at 5:15pm<b>assman266</b> - the 05/21/2009 at 10:04am<b>candraalyssa</b> - the 04/23/2009 at 10:38pm<b>littlebumblebee</b> - the 04/23/2009 at 10:30pm<b>SEKxy</b> - the 03/30/2009 at 11:49pm<b>cyberhoy</b> - the 03/21/2009 at 2:25pm<b>Andy_King</b> - the 03/21/2009 at 1:54pm

smiling_elephant's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

smiling_elephant's favorite FMLs

Today, I went over to surprise my girlfriend of two years with flowers and dinner at her apartment. After I knocked, a handsome young man answered the door. Thinking I had the wrong apartment, I apologized, only to hear my girlfriend's voice call from the background, "Baby, who's there?" FML

by willywonks / 03/21/2009 at 1:33am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I went skinny-dipping with my best friend. We were on the beach and it was fairly crowded but we got in the water at this really secluded area. While we were swimming I looked up to see a homeless man wearing my clothes, walking away. FML

by cjj325 / 03/20/2009 at 7:35pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I texted my college boyfriend to tell him how terrible I felt about cheating. He replied saying he was so relieved because he had been cheating on me with a girl in his dorm. I was talking about my math exam. FML

by gentileman / 03/16/2009 at 1:11pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy

Today, my first girlfriend of over 3 years left me for another guy. She said she's looking for someone who can financially provide for her in the future. The dude owns a T-Mobile kiosk. I'm going to medical school. FML

by thankskimi / 03/15/2009 at 2:29pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

by thatsucks / 02/28/2009 at 6:10am / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Love

Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'virginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'virgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML

by The Sbeak / 02/13/2009 at 10:54am / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy