Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

slayertack

Offline (yesterday at 3:27am) | Search for a member

slayertack

4Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 21 November 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1737
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About slayertack : Video games and snowboarding.

slayertack's page activity

Visits<b>myanichole</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 4:57pm<b>Mar29luckyduckie</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 11:43pm<b>ForeverSilent101</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 2:43pm<b>dillonfi</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 8:31pm<b>PaigeLeeAnn11</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 9:57pm<b>Pandacupcakelove</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 1:58am<b>cottoncandylips</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 1:03am<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 12:37am<b>GrimmCrimm45</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 9:47pm<b>Nameless_Fellow</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 11:44am<b>jfreeman86</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 11:48pm<b>butlins11</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 4:53pm<b>kaycrazyy</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 12:17pm<b>rachgrrr19</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 12:13pm<b>gracehi</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 11:44am<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 10:37am<b>Cherryta</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 9:52am<b>Sansa_Kroma</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 9:42am

Liked!<b>cottoncandylips</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 5:07pm<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 4:37pm<b>kjax</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 3:10pm<b>Pandacupcakelove</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 10:56am

slayertack's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of slayertack's badges

slayertack's favorite FMLs

Today, I ran out of breath while mowing the lawn. I was on a riding lawn mower. FML

#16650975
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9984) - you deserved it (50026)

On 06/13/2011 at 9:08pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, my mom confused me with my dad. She got in the shower with me. FML

#15883377
311 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83385) - you deserved it (6245)

On 04/22/2011 at 7:11am - intimacy - by Damian -

Today, I came home to find that all my porn magazines have been "censored" with a black sharpie. FML

#15874125
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24033) - you deserved it (51651)

On 04/21/2011 at 2:30pm - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, I painted a kids room at my new nanny job while the dad "helped" by staring at my ass and telling me how hard it is to position your "junk" correctly when wearing a speedo. First day on the job. FML

#15865508
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37945) - you deserved it (3443)

On 04/20/2011 at 9:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was running late for school because I had a huge stomach ache. To save on time, I took a taxi. When the taxi driver hit a bump, I lost control of my bowels and shit myself. Not only do I have to wash my underwear in the sink at school now, but I had to pay the driver extra to remove the smell from his car. FML

#14731547
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28291) - you deserved it (5238)

On 01/27/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by Username - Romania (Ilfov)

Today, while giving a brief presentation at work, I blanked out on what I was going to say. I tried to make a joke and tell them I'd had a brain fart, but all I managed to say was "I farted". Well, at least they all laughed. FML

#14211006
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30262) - you deserved it (8151)

On 12/15/2010 at 6:57am - work - by Mike -

Today, after doing a graveyard shift at work, I took the bus home. I fell asleep on the way and woke up 25 miles away from my bus stop. I took another bus heading back and couldn't stay awake. I then woke up where I started from. FML

#10707019
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30396) - you deserved it (12916)

On 05/23/2010 at 3:29am - work - by Around - United States (Florida)

Today, I was on a stationary bike at the gym. I got into a conversation with a very attractive female gym-friend. I felt something cool "down below". I looked down and saw one of my testicles had sneaked out of a hole in my shorts, I quickly looked up only to see her staring at the same thing. FML

#6665165
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20643) - you deserved it (4471)

On 12/08/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by fatguyinalittlecoat (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, at work we were gathered to be told some bad news. One of our colleagues would be taking indefinite leave because his wife had dropped their newborn baby. I accidentally laughed at the image. FML

#6043300
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13015) - you deserved it (55000)

On 10/28/2009 at 6:29pm - work - by R (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, I heard my dad screaming in the hallway. Thinking he was having a heart attack I ran to the hall without looking where I was going. I slipped and slid towards my dad in what turned out to be a mass quantity of diarrhea from one of my two dogs. He was screaming because he stepped in it. FML

#5330246
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37125) - you deserved it (3883)

On 09/18/2009 at 10:27am - animals - by poopEVERYWHERE (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mom drove me to football practice. On the way she told me that she thought I was gay and that my friend was my lover. After 15 agonizing minutes of this, we get to my practice only to be greeted by my shirtless friend wearing a pink bandana saying "Man, you hit me hard last night." FML

#4421825
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76167) - you deserved it (6573)

On 08/10/2009 at 3:10am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him I had none, he yelled angrily "who comes to this city without money?" I replied "apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML

#4029321
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45667) - you deserved it (26311)

On 07/25/2009 at 12:39pm - money - by re2K5 (man) - Korea Republic of (Kyongsang-bukto)

Today, I caught some perverts sitting in a car in front of my house, spying on my neighbors. When they refused to leave, I grabbed a baseball bat and they sped off in a hurry. Later, those same perverts came back to arrest my neighbors for drug trafficking. I had threatened cops. FML

#3419869
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47617) - you deserved it (10755)

On 07/02/2009 at 3:22am - misc - by DaveAlmighty (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my 'girlfriend', who I've been emailing with, was really my friend playing a prank on me. He asked me for naked pictures of myself and I sent them to him. FML

#2842632
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21984) - you deserved it (73232)

On 06/12/2009 at 9:47pm - love - by Paco4242 (man) - United States (Colorado)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: