slayertack

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Offline (the 06/19/2016 at 6:54am)

slayertack

15Fucked!

slayertackslayertack
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 21 November 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3239
  • Number of comments : 71
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About slayertack : Video games, metal and snowboarding.

slayertack's page activity

Visits<b>TheGoatTamer</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 4:53am<b>DerSuldam</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 5:04pm<b>burgermike92</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 2:01pm<b>KeatonHanson</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 6:00pm<b>DerrickJames</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 8:05pm<b>monk191</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 10:43am<b>Michael978</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 4:38pm<b>annoyedperson</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 2:36am<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 12:16am<b>LoneWolf2879</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 9:32am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 5:32pm<b>Dexter_39476</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 9:23am<b>Mrcherryberry</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 9:42pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 9:27pm<b>flyingmind</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 3:22pm<b>schroederk</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 1:50am<b>Cadillac_kid_15</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 10:54pm<b>lizzeh333</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 1:31am

Fucked!<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 3:27am<b>flyingmind</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 11:36am<b>schroederk</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 7:51am<b>Cadillac_kid_15</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 2:40pm<b>grac7</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 12:53pm<b>Quendolin</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 10:20am<b>demamcgirl16</b> - the 09/26/2015 at 5:47am<b>aishah77</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 10:45pm<b>booze_n_bitches</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 2:19am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 12:53pm<b>cottoncandylips</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 5:07pm<b>Pandacupcakelove</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 10:56am

slayertack's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of slayertack's badges

slayertack's favorite FMLs

Today, I ordered some burgers at a fast food joint. When I said, "No lettuce," the cashier looked dumbfounded and asked, "What's that?" I literally had to say, "The green stuff" before she got it. I'm losing hope. FML

by thatisfuckedup / 06/13/2013 at 6:12pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I left my dog in the car while I quickly ran into a store. I came out to a woman smashing at my window, screaming that it was too hot in the car for the dog and saying I was being inhumane. The car was still running and the air conditioning was on. FML

by Anonymous / 06/12/2013 at 12:47pm / United States (New Jersey) / Animals

Today, my friend told me he had just robbed a bank and needed a place to hide. Thinking he was joking, I let him in so we could hang out. 15 minutes later, the cops storm into my apartment. Now I'm an accomplice in a crime I thought was a joke. FML

by Anonymous / 06/10/2013 at 11:23pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my dad masturbating to a nude photo of my mum on the computer. She passed away four years ago. FML

by Anonymous / 06/08/2013 at 4:53pm / United Kingdom (Bromley) / Intimacy

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

by Samprib / 06/01/2013 at 1:09am / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

Today, my mom took me to a bar to cheer me up after being dumped. Two cute guys around my age kept looking over at us the whole night. When I told my mom, she said she was going to get them to come talk to me. Instead, she ended up leaving with both of them. FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2013 at 1:10pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I received a slip through my door saying that the package I'd ordered couldn't be delivered today because no-one was home to sign for it. I got the slip just in time to watch the guy who put it through my letterbox get in his van, look me in the eye and drive off. FML

by JACKxRAWR / 05/18/2013 at 5:41am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus". FML

by Sonofa / 05/17/2013 at 11:52am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I fell down the stairs. My mom came running from the other room because she thought it was the dog. She rolled her eyes and walked away when she saw it was me. FML

by typical / 04/13/2013 at 7:49pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was driving home from a friend's house after a night of partying. Suddenly, I had to poop worse than I ever had to in my entire life. The pain was so bad I had to pull over and pretend to be checking my tires while I let out the entire contents of my bowels onto the road. FML

by poopy pants / 04/07/2013 at 9:47pm / United States (Minnesota) / Health

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head during the horror flick we were watching. Little did I know, my girlfriend isn't a big fan of horror films. It was during a sex scene that intensified the moment. The same sex scene from which emerged a sudden jump-scare. I now have bite marks on my penis. FML

by Cliché... or Touché? / 03/17/2013 at 5:07am / Intimacy

Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend, when my upstairs neighbor decided to take the longest piss known to man. He moaned the entire time. FML

by Anonymous / 03/16/2013 at 2:19am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was taking a peaceful stroll in the local park when a curious turkey decided to follow me. Trying to shoo it away, I swung my leg at it, as if to fake kick it. Being the stupid animal it is, it decided to fly into my leg as I swung, causing my foot to connect to its neck. It died. FML

by Anonymous / 03/03/2013 at 9:40am / Australia (Queensland) / Animals

Today, I went to a paintball match with a group of friends, one of whom brought his dad along. His dad is a weight-lifting, wannabe alpha male fucknut who thinks that chokeslamming opponents is a legitimate close-quarters paintball tactic. My broken shoulder disagrees. FML

by Anonymous / 03/02/2013 at 1:59pm / United Kingdom / Health

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying I needed to come home immediately. When I got there, he informed me that the reason I needed to rush home from work was because he wiped a booger on the wall and it was in the shape of a penis. He said it's a sign, like when people see Jesus in toast. FML

by FlyingFist / 12/03/2012 at 7:38pm / United States / Miscellaneous