Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

slayertack

Offline (15 hours ago) | Search for a member

slayertack

7Fucked!

slayertack
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 21 November 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2111
  • Number of comments : 66
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About slayertack : Video games, metal and snowboarding.

slayertack's page activity

Visits<b>Spencyy</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 11:07am<b>Danielique</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 5:18pm<b>fourth_line_dust</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 3:48pm<b>abNormal62</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 1:49pm<b>oldmanringo</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 5:23pm<b>booze_n_bitches</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 8:19pm<b>petrine</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 11:46pm<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 8:35pm<b>kikoma</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 2:53am<b>yerawizardlizzy</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 10:53pm<b>cutycat136</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 5:59pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 6:53am<b>SweetIam</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 12:15am<b>Kiernan151</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 1:21am<b>myanichole</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 4:57pm<b>Mar29luckyduckie</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 11:43pm<b>ForeverSilent101</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 2:43pm<b>dillonfi</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 8:31pm

Fucked!<b>booze_n_bitches</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 2:19am<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 2:35am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 12:53pm<b>cottoncandylips</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 5:07pm<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 4:37pm<b>Pandacupcakelove</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 10:56am

slayertack's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of slayertack's badges

slayertack's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the park playing Frisbee with my friends, when I saw a boy sitting on a bench looking rather sad. "Hey!" I yelled, and he looked up at me. I lightly threw the Frisbee in his direction, and it hit him in the face. He was blind. FML

#20788974
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57023) - you deserved it (17825)

On 07/17/2013 at 7:15pm - kids - by WasntMe - United States

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

#20787584
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59410) - you deserved it (7023)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was in a restroom, reading this site, when another gentleman walked in. He washed his hands, dried them, nodded at me, then left. It wouldn't ordinarily be so weird, except I was in a one-person restroom. FML

#20784458
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51495) - you deserved it (8509)

On 07/15/2013 at 3:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, after asking my psychiatrist about natural alternatives to medication for my depression, she replied, "Why not Zoidberg?" FML

#20744996
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32724) - you deserved it (6064)

On 06/24/2013 at 6:12pm - health - by thanksdoc (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML

#20743795
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83311) - you deserved it (7608)

On 06/24/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by jgtrflynn (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I took my cat to the vet. The creepy vet looked me in the eyes and said, "This isn't the only pussy I'll be checking out today." FML

#20742647
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54408) - you deserved it (3903)

On 06/23/2013 at 1:26pm - misc - by o_O (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, it's been weeks since some asshat started placing gnomes in my front and back yards. I resorted to setting up cameras, which I thought had deterred the idiot, until I walked into my kitchen this morning and found two gnomes on the counter. Nothing on the tapes. I'm freaking out here. FML

#20742609
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61987) - you deserved it (4080)

On 06/23/2013 at 1:02pm - misc - by ilivealoneandwhatthefuck (man) - Guam

Today, being near-broke, I resorted to shopping at Walmart. Barely ten minutes in, an obese sack of lard posing as a human being shoved me away from the bacon I was looking at. I fell, busted my lip, then got screamed at by another woman for not watching where I was going. FML

#20741232
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51322) - you deserved it (11933)

On 06/22/2013 at 4:55pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I ordered some burgers at a fast food joint. When I said, "No lettuce," the cashier looked dumbfounded and asked, "What's that?" I literally had to say, "The green stuff" before she got it. I'm losing hope. FML

#20724048
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53062) - you deserved it (3629)

On 06/13/2013 at 6:12pm - misc - by thatisfuckedup - United Kingdom

Today, I left my dog in the car while I quickly ran into a store. I came out to a woman smashing at my window, screaming that it was too hot in the car for the dog and saying I was being inhumane. The car was still running and the air conditioning was on. FML

#20721457
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59761) - you deserved it (8561)

On 06/12/2013 at 12:47pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my friend told me he had just robbed a bank and needed a place to hide. Thinking he was joking, I let him in so we could hang out. 15 minutes later, the cops storm into my apartment. Now I'm an accomplice in a crime I thought was a joke. FML

#20718656
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60861) - you deserved it (16786)

On 06/10/2013 at 11:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I walked in on my dad masturbating to a nude photo of my mum on the computer. She passed away four years ago. FML

#20713899
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69077) - you deserved it (13012)

On 06/08/2013 at 4:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Bromley)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69893) - you deserved it (19784)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my mom took me to a bar to cheer me up after being dumped. Two cute guys around my age kept looking over at us the whole night. When I told my mom, she said she was going to get them to come talk to me. Instead, she ended up leaving with both of them. FML

#20679725
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56675) - you deserved it (4764)

On 05/22/2013 at 1:10pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I received a slip through my door saying that the package I'd ordered couldn't be delivered today because no-one was home to sign for it. I got the slip just in time to watch the guy who put it through my letterbox get in his van, look me in the eye and drive off. FML

#20670426
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49361) - you deserved it (3638)

On 05/18/2013 at 5:41am - misc - by JACKxRAWR (man) - United Kingdom



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: