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skxrot

Offline (the 11/08/2014 at 10:14pm) | Search for a member

skxrot

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  • Number of visits : 196
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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skxrot's favorite FMLs

Today, I looool woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn . FML

#21147237
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47099) - you deserved it (4033)

On 05/21/2014 at 12:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

2day the man sitting next to me on the train tried to sneak a dead cat into my bag while I was sleeping. mega FML

#21121912
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42671) - you deserved it (3548)

On 04/24/2014 at 4:52pm - animals - by now have a cat - United States (Illinois)

Today... I cummed home from a night out with the lads. My girlfriend refused to make love to me... saying mah sperm were drunk an would raise hell in her uterus. FML

#21055858
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45213) - you deserved it (14731) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/09/2014 at 10:39pm - intimacy - by vegas-81 - France

Today, I overheard boyfriend bragging to his friend about finally giving me an orgasm yesterday, but that he got scared because orgasm face made me look like ( a camel having a stroke. ) FML

#21007355
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47280) - you deserved it (5378)

On 12/27/2013 at 3:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Jamaica (Saint Andrew)

Today, after having recently told 4-year-old daughter that she won't grow big and tall if she doesn't eat her veggies, she decided to pass this wisdom on to a midget that we passed in the store. FML

#20877041
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57417) - you deserved it (9340)

On 09/11/2013 at 2:10pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I went on a blind date. Sadly, I wasn't blind enough. real FML

#20111868
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10549) - you deserved it (28220)

On 10/11/2012 at 10:02am - love - by goodeyesight (man) - Brazil (Sao Paulo)

Today, while helping mah father build a shelf, I suggestd that we should probably use the instruction manual. He suggestd I should probably shut the fuck up and do it his way. FML

#18738481
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27055) - you deserved it (14021)

On 01/07/2012 at 7:12pm - misc - by Jman6295 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today , I Couldn't Contain My Laughterhen A Patient Told Me She'd Namd Her Unborn Daughter Twinkie. Real FML

#18728006
401 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32680) - you deserved it (4937)

On 01/06/2012 at 5:49pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today , At Work , I Slippd And Fell On My Backside!! The Creepy Security Guard Offerd To 'kiss It Better.' FML

#18724362
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28007) - you deserved it (2937)

On 01/06/2012 at 6:40am - intimacy - by only 10 more hours to go (woman) - United States

Today, I tried exercising. Myhole house shook. FML

#18691343
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25774) - you deserved it (13161)

On 01/02/2012 at 10:47pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today , I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working , so I put it between mah knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately , I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out , I was trying to pop the cat. FML

#18312960
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34474) - you deserved it (6040)

On 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm - animals - by furryballoon (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I Found Out That My 20-year-old Boyfriend Won't Touch My Boobs Because He Is Afraid His Parent Will Find Out. FML

#18203488
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42556) - you deserved it (5082)

On 11/09/2011 at 5:48pm - intimacy - by Great... (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, ma mom instructed me to never scream wen bieng attacked by a rapist. Apparently it would only anger im, causing looool im to cop ma boobs off and superglue ma eyes sut. FML

#17853519
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36088) - you deserved it (2904)

On 09/28/2011 at 2:47am - intimacy - by Sabraynay -

Today I Ran Over Mah Neighbors' Cat. I Didn't Want It To Look Like I Killed It So I Putted It Under Mah Other Neighbor's Car So It Would Look Like They Ran Over It. The Cat's Owner Were Watching Me. Big Fat FML

#13137769
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7608) - you deserved it (72286)

On 09/21/2010 at 12:49am - animals - by awesome - United States (Arizona)

Today, I had to explain to my son that his dad was too busy in a raid on World of Warcraft to be at his award ceremony. FML

#7816615
489 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47450) - you deserved it (37016)

On 02/02/2010 at 3:30pm - kids - by fuckmylife (woman) - United States (Maryland)



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  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

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